The Ant and the Grasshopper

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Pburgh
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The Ant and the Grasshopper

#1 Postby Pburgh » Thu Mar 18, 2004 2:17 pm

The Ant and the Grasshopper
>>>OLD VERSION OF THE STORY:
>>>
>>> The Ant works hard performing his tasks all summer long, building his
>>> house and laying up supplies for the winter.
>>>
>>> The Grasshopper thinks he is a fool and laughs, dances and plays the
>>> summer away.
>>>
>>>Come winter, the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper has no food
>>> or shelter so he dies out in the cold. MORAL OF THE STORY: Work hard and
>>> be responsible for yourself.
>>>
>>>Keep Reading...
>>>MODERN VERSION OF THE STORY:
>>>The Ant works hard performing his task, building his house and laying up
>>> supplies for the winter.
>>>The Grasshopper thinks he is a fool and laughs, dances and plays the
>>> summer away.
>>>Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a Press Conference and
>>> demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed,
>>> while others are cold and starving.
>>> CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
>>> Grasshopper and to video him standing next to the Ant, who is sitting at
>>> his table filled with food.
>>> How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor Grasshopper
>>> is allowed to suffer so?
>> Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the Grasshopper, and everybody
>>> cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green".
>>> Jessie Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the Ant's house where
>>> the News Stations film the group singing "We Shall Overcome". Jessie
>>> then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the Grasshopper's sake.
>>> Tom Daschle and Walter Mondale exclaim, in an interview, with Peter
>>> Jennings that the Ant has gotten rich off the back of the Grasshopper,
>>> and both call for an immediate tax hike on the Ant to make him pay his
>>> "fair share".
>>> Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act",
>>> retroactive to the beginning of summer.
>>>
> The Ant is then fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of
>>> green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, the
>>> Ant's home is confiscated by the government.
>>> Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the Grasshopper in a
>>> defamation suit against the Ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
>>> federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single parent welfare
>>> recipients..
>> The Ant loses the case.
> The story ends as we see the Grasshopper finishing up the last bits of
>>> the Ant's food, while the government's house he is in, "which just
>>> happens to be the Ant's old house", crumbles around him, because he
>>> doesn't maintain it.
>> The Ant has disappeared in the snow.
>>>The Grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house,
>>> now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once
>>> peaceful neighborhood.
>>> MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican
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