TWW'S CRAZY NEWS STORIES

[TexasStooge]

BBC names "wrong Guy" in interview mix-up

LONDON, England (Reuters) - The BBC has revealed that a bewildered man it interviewed live on TV in the mistaken belief he was the editor of a technology website was, quite literally, "the wrong Guy."

He was Guy Goma, a graduate from central Africa, who had gone to the BBC's News 24 studios for a job interview.

Goma sat down in the BBC reception and waited to be called for the interview. A producer greeted him, led him to a studio, seated him on a stool and clipped a microphone to his lapel.

A business presenter then introduced the clearly startled Goma as the editor of a technology website and asked if he was surprised by computer company Apple's victory in a trademark dispute with The Beatles' Apple Corp.

He gamely answered, and grappled with two more questions about music downloading, before the flustered presenter thanked him and moved on.

It emerged only later that he was the wrong Guy, and that the producer mistook him for Guy Kewney, the real technology website editor.

Kewney, who watched the interview with astonishment at reception, said the mix-up was hard to explain because BBC staff had seen his picture in advance. Kewney is white and Goma is black.

The BBC apologized to Goma and invited him back to the studio Tuesday for a follow-up interview.

"(It was) very stressful," said Goma, whose first language is not English. "When I was on set already and we started already the presentation, I couldn't stop ... so at that time I said 'keep going'..."

The BBC has yet to say whether Goma got the job he applied for, as a data support cleanser.

[TexasStooge]

Castro says he's not wealthy, Forbes story untrue

By Anthony Boadle

HAVANA, Cuba (Reuters) - Cuban President Fidel Castro furiously denied on Monday a story in Forbes magazine that he was worth $900 million and said he would step down if the magazine could prove the assertion.

The financial magazine ranked Castro as the seventh wealthiest ruler in the world in its annual tally of the "Fortunes of Kings, Queens and Dictators."

Castro went on television brandishing a copy of the U.S.-based magazine to tell Cubans the story was a "repugnant slander" by a capitalist publication.

With Communist Cuba's Central Bank governor at his side, Castro challenged Forbes to prove the allegation.

"If they can prove that I have a bank account abroad, with $900 million, with $1 million, $500,000, $100,000 or $1 in it, I will resign," he said at the end of a four-hour broadcast.

"It is so ridiculous to say I have a fortune of $900 million, a fortune with no heirs. What would I need all that money for, if I will soon be 80 years old?

Castro, in power since a leftist revolution in 1959, says his net worth is nil and that he earns only 900 Cuban pesos ($40) a month.

Kings and sheiks of the oil-rich Gulf Arab states still top the Forbes list, published in its May 22 edition.

Castro ranked higher than Queen Elizabeth of Great Britain, whose fortune according to the Forbes amounts to some $500 million in estates, gems and a stamp collection built by her grandfather, but not Buckingham Palace or the crown jewels. The British monarch came to the throne in 1952, seven years before Castro seized power.

Castro last year threatened to sue Forbes after the magazine included him on its 2005 list with an estimated fortune of $550 million.

The Forbes estimate includes state enterprises that the magazine assumes he controls in Cuba, among them the Havana Convention Center, the Cimex retail conglomerate and a pharmaceutical company that exports vaccines.

Forbes said it assumed a portion of the profits of state companies goes to Castro and cited rumors of money stashed in Swiss bank accounts, but gave no details, saying former Cuban officials insist Castro has skimmed profits for years.

[TexasStooge]

Old Master Tiepolo promises art bargain for Italy

By Sophie Hardach

MILAN (Reuters) - Three perfectly preserved paintings by Old Master Giambattista Tiepolo that have been hidden from public view for centuries will go on sale for a fraction of their international market price later this month.

The snag?

They can never leave Italy.

Italy's government denied the required export license to the paintings because it considers them works of cultural and national significance.

While that considerably reduces the number of potential buyers, the fact that the paintings have always stayed close to home is also part of their appeal.

The Tiepolos were commissioned by the Sandi family of lawyers for their Venetian palazzo in the 1720s, and have remained in the same family, which moved them to a villa in mainland Veneto in the early 20th century.

Auction house Sotheby's will offer them for sale on May 30 and has shown them in Rome and Milan over the past few weeks.

"They always had the same owners so that was the first time they were shown to the public," said Sotheby's spokeswoman Wanda Rotelli. "That's also why they are so well preserved, it is really extraordinary."

The works are part of a series of five paintings, two of which are by Nicolo Bambini, depicting Greek and Roman myths as allegories on the power of eloquence and virtue. Tiepolo's works are titled "The Flaying of Marsyas," "Hercules and Anteus," and "Ulysses discovering Achilles among the daughters of Lycomedes."

The biggest Tiepolo painting measures 2.5 metres (8 ft) by 5.2 metres.

Tiepolo was in his 20s when he took on the commission, at the start of a career that made him one of the most important Italian Rococo artists and took him to Germany and Spain.

Sotheby's will offer the five paintings as a single lot and expects them to fetch 4 million euros ($5.12 million) at the auction, which Rotelli said was far below their estimated international market price -- which could be around $20-30 million.

She expected private Italian collectors or museums to bid for the paintings, or banks planning to make a donation -- although she also did not exclude that an American millionaire might be looking for a nice addition for his Venetian palazzo.

[TexasStooge]

Power Is Shut Off Over One Cent

FLINT, Mich. (AP) - It was just a penny, but to Consumers Energy it was enough to cut off power in a local home. Jacqueline Williams, 41, of Flint had an electricity bill of $1,662.08 and paid all of it, except for one cent. That wasn't enough for the power company, which blacked her out for seven hours Wednesday.

The CMS Energy Corp. subsidiary told Williams the power would not be turned on until the penny was received.

"I went down there, paid my penny and got a receipt," Williams told The Flint Journal.

Shortly after, the electricity was turned back on.

"All of this for one penny," said Williams, who went to the state Department of Human Services for help in April and was told the agency would pay most of the bill.

But she was still short more than $500.

Williams, a Social Security recipient, went to the Salvation Army, where she received $430.67, and Consumers agreed to match $430.66 toward the bill.

However, she was still one cent short.

A Consumers Energy spokesman said that the utility had no choice in the matter, though he was not aware of any similar incidents where service was stopped for one cent.

"This was the first one I've heard about," said Terry DeDoes. He said the company has many programs to help people who fall behind in their utility bills.

Williams said she doesn't want to find herself in the same situation again.

"I'm praying to God I stay on top of my bills," she said.
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Information from: The Flint Journal

[TexasStooge]

Tainted muffins sicken school workers

By BRAD HAWKINS / WFAA ABC 8

DALLAS, Texas - Seventeen employees at Lake Highlands High School were taken to the hospital with symptoms of food poisoning Tuesday afternoon.

An 18th worker was treated at the school, in the 9400 block of Church Road in Northeast Dallas.

All of those who were sickened were said to have eaten from the same batch of muffins in the teachers' lounge.

Dallas County Health and Human Services spokeswoman Jacqueline Bell said authorities were looking into several possibilities for the incident. She said criminal activity had not been ruled out.

School officials said they would review security camera footage that could indicate whether the muffins had been tampered with.

In an e-mail message to parents issued by Lake Highlands executive assistant Karen Clardy, the school said no students had fallen ill. The message also said all staff members seem to be "in good condition."

Lake Highlands High School, with an enrollment of about 1,900 students, is in the Richardson ISD.

[TexasStooge]

Doctor Catches 385-Pound Lemon Shark

By ADRIAN SAINZ, Associated Press Writer

MIAMI, Fla. - A doctor with a slew of world fishing records added another one to his collection when he caught a 385-pound lemon shark on fly tackle, the International Game Fish Association said Tuesday.

Dr. Martin Arostegui caught the heaviest fish ever documented on fly tackle, beating out a nearly 40-year-old record, IGFA world records coordinator Rebecca Reynolds said.

"We brought it in alive and we released it alive," Arostegui told The Associated Press in a telephone interview. "That to me is what made the catch very special."

Arostegui caught the lemon shark in flats near the Marquesas Keys west of Key West in early March.

He and Capt. Ralph Delph of Key West used a filleted barracuda tied to the boat to create a scent line that attracted the hungry shark, Arostegui said.

As he watched the shark approach, he switched to a fly rod with 12-pound tippet and a bright orange, 7-inch feathered fly streamer. Arostegui said he quickly moved it one time and hooked the fish.

He fought the fish for one hour, and at one point the shark opened its jaws and attacked Delph's 29-foot boat.

"He could have eaten half of me or even all of me in one bite," said Arostegui, who stands at 5 feet tall.

The next step was restraining and hauling aboard the dangerous shark. Delph gaffed it in the soft, fleshy part of its tail as Arostegui tied the fish in front of the tail with a cleated rope.

But the fish proved too heavy to bring aboard, so they enlisted the help of another fisherman and guide who were nearby. The four men wrestled the shark into a 10-foot long live well designed by Delph.

The 7 1/2-foot long fish was brought into Key West and weighed. After a 60-day waiting period, the fishing association confirmed the record catch, but placed it in the 16-pound tippet line class because Arostegui's weighed in at 13 pounds. A tippet is the part of a leader that a fly is attached to.

The previous record for heaviest fish on fly tackle was a 356-pound goliath grouper, also known as jewfish, caught by Bart Froth in Islamorada on 12-pound tippet. That record had been on the books since March 15, 1967.

Last year, Arostegui, of Coral Gables, received a lifetime achievement award from the IGFA for over 100 world record catches through 2004.

With his latest catch, Arostegui also beat his own 257-pound record for a lemon shark, and the heaviest shark on fly tackle, beating out a 353-pound hammerhead shark caught two years ago.
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On the Net: International Game Fish Association

[TexasStooge]

Seat Belt, Bra Save Woman From Gunshot

TAMPA, Fla. (AP) - A 44-year-old woman escaped serious injury from a gunshot Sunday thanks to her seat belt and a thick bra strap, authorities said.

Robin Key, 44, of Riverview, Fla., was shot through the windshield of the car she was riding in Sunday. She said she felt a searing pain in her shoulder.

Hillsborough County sheriff's deputies said a .38-caliber bullet smashed through the windshield then bounced off Key's shoulder — thanks to a seat belt and a thick bra strap.

The copper-jacketed slug landed in her lap.

"It's a big bullet, but you had all those forces acting against it," Hillsborough sheriff's spokesman J.D. Callaway told the St. Petersburg Times. "It's very rare that something like that occurs. She's very lucky. You know, we're just glad she came out OK."

Key said she didn't know why anyone would shoot her. Sheriff's deputies later arrested two men in connection with the shooting several hours later.

Authorities said they do not have a motive for the shooting.

[TexasStooge]

Dentist With Roaming Cat Gives Up License

SPOKANE, Wash. (AP) - An elderly dentist who let a cat roam through his examination rooms has voluntarily surrendered his license.

Henry G. Kolsrud, 82, also agreed he will never practice dentistry in Washington again, rather than face the possibility of sanctions, the state Department of Health said Monday.

An investigation of his office in early 2005 revealed unsafe and unsanitary conditions, according to the agency.

Among the allegations: Dental instruments were not sterilized between use; staff was inadequately trained; a cat was allowed to roam in examination rooms; cat food was kept in the same refrigerator as dental supplies and Kolsrud "scooped up feline feces and vomit with a spatula normally used for mixing dental impression fabrication material."

In May 2005, the state Department of Social and Health Services terminated Kolsrud's contract to provide Medicaid care to his low-income patients.

Last December, the dentist was ordered to appear before the state's Dental Quality Assurance Commission to answer charges of unprofessional conduct based on what inspectors saw and what they heard from current and former employees.

In January 2006, when the charges were announced, Kolsrud's attorney, Stephen Lamberson, said many of the allegations were "simply untrue" and others were the fabrication of "a disgruntled employee."

Kolsrud, who had practiced dentistry since 1953, in March signed a Health Department order agreeing to surrender his license.

[TexasStooge]

Crime-Fighting Cat Now Trying Therapy

NEW YORK (AP) - It's on to the next caper for Fred, the crime-fighting cat. The feline, part of an undercover sting in February to get a man pretending to be a veterinarian, is in the process of being certified as a therapy cat, according to his owner, Brooklyn Assistant District Attorney Carol Moran.

She told Newsday in Tuesday's editions that once the paperwork is filed, Fred will be part of a program that will bring him into schools to show children the importance of animal care.

The tabby received high marks on a behavioral test, Moran said, because he was comfortable with being petted and held by strangers and being in crowded spaces.

Fred posed as a patient as part of a sting operation that netted a man who allegedly treated an untold number of pets without a license.

[TexasStooge]

Rejected Candidate Says Kiss My (Bleep)

RICHMOND, Va. (AP) - Denied the Democratic nomination to run for Congress, a psychotherapist who conducts nude group sessions told party leaders in an e-mail to kiss his rump.

Democrats on Saturday chose no nominee rather than select Brad Blanton of Page County to challenge Republican Rep. Eric I. Cantor for his 7th District seat.

Blanton's e-mail, sent Sunday night, used a three-letter barnyard term, according to the Richmond Times-Dispatch. "If that is not clear enough for you, call me and I'll tell you in person," the newspaper quoted from the e-mail.

Henrico County Democratic chairman Tim Mitchell said Blanton's retort "proves that the Democratic Party and the process we use works well."

Two years ago, Cantor won three-fourths of the vote over Blanton, who ran as an independent. Blanton wrote in his e-mail that he might run as an independent this fall, attacking Democrats and Republicans alike if he does.
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Information from: Richmond Times-Dispatch

[TexasStooge]

Man Sentenced for Fraud Gets Gold Watch

DETROIT, Mich. (AP) - A former East Detroit school board member who was sentenced to one year in prison for his role in a bribery and embezzlement scandal received a $175 engraved gold-plated watch this spring for his 20 years as a municipal firefighter.

Eastpointe City Manager Randy Altimus said the city was "trying to do the right thing" when it gave the watch to Joseph Croff.

"What he did with the East Detroit School system didn't have anything to do with us," Altimus told The Detroit News for a story Tuesday. "He was eligible for a watch. He left the city before he was convicted."

Some residents said the honor angered them.

"The guy stole from us and now he gets an award," Kathy DiCenzo said. "I was just livid."

Efforts to reach Croff Tuesday at several telephone listings in Macomb County were unsuccessful.

Croff was indicted in 2002 and retired as a firefighter in 2003.

In 2004, he pleaded guilty in Detroit's U.S. District Court to one count of extortion. Croff said he received $75,000 in cash and merchandise from William Hudson and his company, Hudson Construction, over a four-year period without disclosing the gifts when voting in favor of Hudson's projects at the school.

Federal prosecutors say 20 people drained about $3 million from East Detroit and Clintondale Community Schools.
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Information from: The Detroit News

[TexasStooge]

Man Bolts Lamborghini on Wall in Mansion

NEWPORT BEACH, Calif. (AP) - Auto art has been taken to a new level after an Orange County man bolted a 1974 black Lamborghini Countach to a wall inside his home.

Millionaire Richard Moriarty hired a 70-ton crane to lower the Italian sports car into his mansion through a skylight in the living room.

On Friday, a five-man crew hung the 1,000-pound engineless vehicle from a steel-reinforced wall with loops of half-inch-thick steel cable.

Explaining the unusual placement for the car, Moriarty said, "I have a Lamborghini and I've got a big wall."

The car's engine was removed and transformed into a "200-mph coffee table," he said.

This isn't the first time Moriarty, an heir to the family that developed South Coast Plaza in Costa Mesa, has installed offbeat elements in his home. Previous innovations include an indoor rifle range and a 28-foot-high interior waterfall, architect Fleetwood Joiner said.

Moriarty's irreverent tastes don't stop at home decor.

The 58-year-old organized exotic parties in the 1980s, and more recently he planted a vineyard on his 3.5-acre estate and began bottling wines under such labels as "Wretched Excess" and "The Idle Rich."

[TexasStooge]

California home for sale for $75 million

CORONA DEL MAR, California (Reuters) - A Southern California oceanfront home would break a record if sold for its $75 million listing price, an analyst with the National Association of Realtors said Tuesday.

The 30,000-square-foot custom-built estate belongs to Frank Pritt, founder of software company Attachmate Corp. The estate features a car museum, entertainment complex, gymnasium and mini water park.

"It's a trophy home," said Carrie Williams, media director for the McMonigle Group, which listed the estate for sale. "It's secure and private -- for a celebrity, sports star or someone of that ilk."

The record U.S. home sale price was posted two years ago when Ron Perelman sold his Palm Beach, Florida, home for $70 million, according to the National Association of Realtors.
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WANTED: High-rollers in Las Vegas to buy a house for $75 Million in California!

[TexasStooge]

Boy Scouts to auction 101-yr old tall ship

NEWPORT BEACH, California (Reuters) - The Boy Scouts of America are auctioning off a 101-year-old wooden tall ship, once used to teach sailing techniques and maritime history, because it needs costly repairs.

For the past 35 years, the Boy Scouts have used the Danish-built Argus as a floating classroom. In February, it was found to have dry rot and the estimated $1.5 million needed for repairs made the vessel too costly to keep, Boy Scouts spokeswoman Lara Fisher said Tuesday.

The ship will be listed on http://www.ebay.com this week with a starting bid of $75,000, unless a benefactor appears before then.

"It is heartbreaking to us," Fisher said.

The ship operated without an engine around the Baltic until 1917, hauling lumber and cement. It ferried grain to Greenland and fish to Spain and was featured in the 1966 movie "Hawaii" starring Julie Andrews, according to a Web site about previous owner R. Tucker Thompson.

The Boy Scouts bought the ship from Thompson in the 1970s.

[TexasStooge]

Boogie knights...

By Gideon Long

LONDON, England (Reuters) - Anyone who thinks pomp, pageantry and arcane rituals have disappeared from modern British life should have been at Westminster Abbey Wednesday, where Queen Elizabeth oversaw a ceremony of the Order of the Bath.

In a rite dating back to at least the 12th century, the Queen "installed" eight new knights.

That means they now have their own carved wooden seats in a sumptuous chapel of the abbey and have the right to fly their personal flags, banners and crests above their seats.

The Queen, dressed in crimson robes lined with white taffeta, presided over the ceremony with her son and heir Britain's Prince Charles, Grand Master of the Order of the Bath.

The knights, all senior figures from the British military and intelligence services, had the order's distinctive badge -- a silver eight-pointed Maltese cross -- pinned to their robes.

The ceremony happens every four years, and the Queen attends it every eight years. It goes largely unnoticed, but this year's ceremony came amid growing discontent over the way honours like knighthoods are awarded.

Police have launched a probe into allegations that Prime Minister Tony Blair's Labor party nominated millionaires to the House of Lords -- parliament's unelected upper chamber -- in return for loans.

While the knights of the Order of the Bath are in no way embroiled in the probe, they are part of the same honours system which is coming under increasing scrutiny.

Hundreds of famous Britons, including rock star David Bowie, artists Lucian Freud and David Hockney, author Doris Lessing and dramatist Harold Pinter have all declined honours.

In 2003, black British poet Benjamin Zephaniah publicly rejected an honor, the Order of the British Empire (OBE), because he said it reminded him of "thousands of years of brutality" committed in the name of British imperialism.

ELITE CLUB

There is no doubting the prestige of the Most Honorable Order of the Bath, to give it its full name.

Past knights have included Lord Nelson and the Duke of Wellington as well as Field Marshals Kitchener and Haig, architects of British military strategy in World War One.

People are nominated to the order on the basis of their service to the nation, particularly in times of war.

Foreigners can also be admitted as honorary members. Former U.S. Presidents Ronald Reagan and George Bush are among those who have been allowed in to this elite club.

The Order of the Bath gets its peculiar name from its origins in the Middle Ages, when knights bathed on the eve of their investiture as a symbol of spiritual purification.

A document from 1128 describes how one knight "immersed his body in a bath and was afterwards habited by the attendants in crimson robes, while a sword was girded about his body and golden spurs placed upon his heels."

The order all but disappeared in the 17th century but was revived in 1725 by King George I and has been investing new knights ever since. It opened its doors to women in 1971.

With its ornate costumes and quirky titles -- one of its officials is known as The Gentleman Usher of the Scarlet Rod -- the Order of the Bath is, for some, a quintessentially British institution.

For others, it is a relic of the past which has little relevance in a modern European state in the 21st century.

[TexasStooge]

Not always in tune with U.S. policies

By Esteban Israel

HAVANA, Cuba (Reuters) - Benjamin Treuhaft believes pianos are not a threat to U.S. national security even if they are played in Cuba.

Risking fines and jail for "trading with the enemy," the New York piano tuner has shipped 237 pianos to Communist-run Cuba since 1995 to replace old Soviet-made pianos damaged by tropical humidity and termites.

This week he returned to Havana with 200 lbs (100 kg) of tools and a dozen music lovers to help tune the second-hand pianos donated by Americans through his non-profit "Send a Piano to Havana" program.

The 58-year-old bandana-clad activist opposes U.S. trade sanctions against Cuba on humanitarian grounds and has been to Cuba 16 times defying a travel ban for Americans.

"I was hoping to break the embargo when I first came," Treuhaft said on Tuesday as he tuned a 1934 Story & Clark Baby Grand piano donated by a woman in Concord, California.

"There was a horrible situation for pianos. The climate, the conditions, the blockade against commerce and parts," he said.

In the mid-1990s Treuhaft was fined $3,500 for going to Cuba. That did not stop him. He refused to pay.

But things have got more complicated after the Bush administration began tightening restrictions on Cuba in 2002.

In March Treuhaft received a warning from the Treasury Department that he would face criminal penalties of up to 10 years in prison and $1 million in fines if he went ahead with a plan to set up a copper bass string factory in Cuba.

Treuhaft does not care that his venture violates U.S. laws designed to undermine Cuban leader Fidel Castro's 47-year rule and bring about political change in Cuba.

He plans to call the factory the Helms-Treuhaft Piano Bass String Company, in reference to former Republican Senator Jesse Helms who sponsored a 1996 law strengthening the embargo.

"This is a holiday trip. I like to tune pianos on my holidays," Treuhaft said.

[TexasStooge]

Hairloss ad breached industry code

LONDON, England (Reuters) - A British television advert for a hair-loss treatment endorsed by Australian cricketer Shane Warne was found in breach of industry rules Wednesday.

The Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) said the advert for Advanced Hair Studio was at fault because it had used a celebrity to endorse a treatment that involved medicine.

Warne, who is currently playing county cricket in England, is featured in the advert with the phrase "Warnie, Warnie, Warnie" and his quote saying "I've been hearing it for years but to me I've always taken it as 'warning.'"

"And that warning was that if I didn't do something about my hair loss, they may well have been chanting 'baldy.'"

In small text, the advert made reference to Advanced Laser Therapy (ALT), which uses a medicine, minoxidil. The ASA said readers could have inferred that Warne was endorsing ALT and ordered the company behind the advert to withdraw any mention of the treatment in adverts featuring Warne.

[TexasStooge]

Kentucky Family Fights to Keep Pet Lion

By SAMIRA JAFARI, Associated Press Writer

MELVIN, Ky. - Amid a backdrop of colorful swingsets, clunky cars and giggling kids, a beast with a thick mane and daunting eyes paces in his cage. To some around this small Appalachian town, he's a frightening menace. To others, he's the local mascot, a novelty.

But to the Collins family, he's "Kitty," their beloved pet lion.

"That's my kid," said 22-year-old Melissa Collins, a married mother of three, as she pet Kitty through his 300-square-foot chain-link cage.

County officials may try to force the Collins family to find a new home for Kitty soon, though the family says it will fight the effort.

A county ordinance that would bar animals deemed "inherently dangerous" by the state is up for a vote Friday. If it passes, Kitty would no longer be allowed to stay in this rural neighborhood, where homes are within a few yards of each other.

Pauline Hall, who lives three houses down from the Collins family, said she lives in fear of the lion.

"I think it needs to be in a different environment," Hall said. "Everybody here keeps their guns loaded."

A Kentucky regulation that went into effect in July prohibits transporting animals labeled inherently dangerous by the state Department of Fish and Wildlife Resources, such as vipers, alligators, bears, tigers and lions.

But folks like Barry and Melissa Collins, who owned dangerous animals before the rule went into effect, are allowed to keep them, said Laura Patton, a state wildlife biologist. Bringing in more dangerous animals or breeding the ones they already have is still against the rules.

The state does not have a law that specifically deals with the ownership of exotic wildlife, she said.

Large exotic cats, such as lions, tigers or leopards, make up a small number of the transport permits each year. The vast majority are for reptiles, such as anacondas, basilisks and bearded dragons.

The federal government only requires licenses for exotic animals if they are used for breeding or as an exhibition, so it was unclear how many people are keeping exotic animals as pets.

The Collinses said they were caught by surprise when the ordinance was proposed. They said they've heard a handful of complaints since they brought the lion home, but nothing serious.

"He's not bothering nobody," said Barry Collins. "Why take him from where he's happy and put him where he's not?"

When asked whether he considers his lion to be inherently dangerous, Collins insisted that any pet can behave unpredictably. He doesn't feel that Kitty is a threat to his 5- and 1-year-old boys or 3-year-old daughter.

Another neighbor, April Osborne, also defended Kitty: "I think they should be able to keep it — anything can turn on you. That thing is a big old baby."

Barry Collins purchased Kitty three years ago, when he was a 5-pound cub at a flea market. Collins said he obtained a state permit to bring the lion into Kentucky and a license to keep it in Floyd County.

But now that Kitty's purr has reached a deafening moan and his girth has exceeded 400 pounds, some Floyd County residents want him gone.

The only way to kick Kitty out of the neighborhood is with a county ordinance, said Floyd County Attorney Keith Bartley.

"I'm sure it is a big pet to the owners," Bartley said, "but the one time something goes wrong with a cat that size, someone's going to be really hurt or dead."

The Collins' also have a dozen dogs and a lizard.

They said all their pet purchases were a way to save the animals from harm or abuse. "If I can save one I will," Melissa Collins said.

Bartley said he's working with a local veterinarian to find a zoo or a wildlife sanctuary where the lion could be placed.

"It's not just about protecting those people living in Melvin, it's also about the lion itself," said Bartley. "If they love that lion, I don't believe they'd want it to live its entire life in a dog cage on a concrete pad."

Barry Collins said that if the ordinance fails, he may put up a privacy fence that would give Kitty more space to roam. For now, he is trying to sway the vote of county officials by encouraging friends and supportive neighbors to speak up for Kitty.

"I'm going to fight it all I can," he said, adding that he would appeal the vote if the ordinance passed. "I'm going to drag it out as far as I can."

[TexasStooge]

Dog Rescues Boy, 9, From Colorado River

GLENWOOD SPRINGS, Colo. (AP) - A Labrador retriever rescued a 9-year-old survivor of Hurricane Katrina from a river after the boy's raft hit a log and he fell overboard, authorities said.

Ryan Rambo, 9, whose family moved to this western Colorado town last year after the hurricane struck their Marrero, La., home, fell into the Roaring Fork River on Sunday, Garfield County Sheriff Lou Vallario said.

The 2-year-old Lab, named Zion, jumped in the river and swam to Ryan after he began screaming for help, said Chelsea Bennett, 13, the dog's owner.

Ryan held on to Zion as the dog swam back to the bank. The boy suffered only a scratch, said his mother, Deana Rambo.

"How ironic, isn't it?" Deana Rambo said. "We come here to get away from flood waters, and he nearly drowns in the river."

[TexasStooge]

Man Claims to Find Rodent Tooth in Peanuts

BELLEVILLE, Ill. (AP) - A man is suing Kraft Foods Inc., claiming he found what appeared to be a rodent tooth in a package of Planters peanuts he bought last year.

Carl Cornett, 52, filed the lawsuit in St. Clair County Circuit Court, seeking up to $55,000 in damages from the nation's largest food company. It was not immediately clear when the suit was filed.

A spokeswoman for Kraft, which packages Planters peanuts in Arkansas and Virginia, declined comment Tuesday to the St. Louis Post- Dispatch. Laurie Guzzinati said the Northfield-based company does not discuss pending litigation. The company did not immediately return a call from The Associated Press Wednesday.

The suit alleges that Cornett bought the peanuts at an O'Fallon store last August and later was eating them at his home when he bit into a "non-human animal tooth." Cornett's attorney, Jack Johnston, said the tooth "looks like it would be from a herbivorous rodent of some type."

According to the lawsuit, Cornett became physically and mentally ill, worried that he might have exposed himself to disease.

Johnston said Kraft asked him to submit the tooth for testing. Johnston declined, saying he refused to part with the evidence.
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If you found a surprise in a pack of peanuts, you can sure find a surprise in...Hamwinkies!


Image courtesy of E!'s "The Soup"