My Best Friend Mary Passed away today

[Rainband]

Please continue to Pray. thank you all

[DaylilyDawn]

Prayers still coming from Lakeland for Mary.

[Rainband]

Mary is fighting going to Hospice. She has made her peace with herself and both her boys have visited her. She doesn't have long now. She says she is tired and ironically last night she apologized to me. I said you don't owe me an apology. Please pray for Peace for her. God bless you all thank you

[dizzyfish]

Prayers for you all.

[Pburgh]

I know how much Mary means to you and you all are in my prayers. May she be free of pain and at peace.

((HUGS)) my friend
Karan

[DaylilyDawn]

I am praying that Mary will find peace and that you will find peace after she passes. Just reassure her that Hospice will not try to prolong her life but will make her remaining days more comfortable for her.

[angelwing]

Praying that Mary is at peace and also praying for you.

Mary

[vbhoutex]

Prayers still coming in from Houston that God's will be done. We're praying for you too Jon!!!

[Rainband]

thank you all

[TexasStooge]

Many prayers coming from the Dallas/Fort Worth area.

Had a similar situation where a fellow member of a Sci-Fi Club passed away late March. Last month, with the help of the City of Irving, we planted a Memorial Tree at a park where we usually held the water wars.

[Stephanie]

Prayers coming from NJ for Mary, her family and for you Jonathan!

May she be at peace.

[Thierry_Gironde]

I'm not religious, so I can't offer your my prayers, but I went through the same thing with my dad. Sometimes it seems that despite hope, beyond everything, whatever happens, just be with her. You don't have to talk, you probably both know each other's thoughts anyway. I might sound bleak, and generally that's the case, but promise you won't ignore her, as scary as it is to face something like this.

When my dad was diagnosed, I had just gotten out of the hospital after three weeks following a suicide attempt. I tried to hang myself from a cross beam that ran across the ceiling of my room. My dad knew I was depressed, and for whatever reason, he busted into my locked room on that particular day just as my vision started to fade. Three weeks later, roles reversed, and I withdrew. I avoided him in the house, I couldn't speak to him, I was scared to look at him. That only got worse as his cancer got worse. It was awful. He had just saved me from dying, but what could I do for him?

He went into hospice, but by then he was on so many painkillers, it was not comforting. To watch his body die, then to find his personality just vanished, I was willing to let that be my last memory of him; being wheeled down a hallway, a faint whisper of the person I'd relied on my whole life. And I regret that every day. I didn't say good bye, that I loved him, despite his being a major pain in the ass, but worse still, his last breath was in his hospice room, alone. Of course I couldn't have cured him, and really it didn't matter that his mind was so warped from meds, the greatest thing I could've done, the best way to express to him what I'd kept to myself, all I had to do was be there. Didn't have to talk, or look, or say goodbyes, he had be alone his whole life, all he wanted was someone at the chair beside him.

I can't take back my inaction, and I am fine in the thought that maybe I can't be forgiven for that, but that's why I won't offer prayers. Be strong for you, for Mary, and carry with you forever the meaning she gave to your life. Be sad, be angry, be whatever; as long as you're there, in person, in thought, in spirit, just don't throw anything away, face it all head on, tell fear you've got no regrets. And should the worst come, be sad in your own way. You might not cry, you might feel empty, but don't force yourself to grieve in steps.

I feel that sharing my story with people who are going through the same thing...is the only way I can thank my father for saving me from myself. I suppose this all is my prayer; if my advice, if my words are helpful to someone who may need them, I can forgive myself a little. I know its selfish, and I apologise. Just be for Mary what you've been so far, a best friend, and find strength in that bond, knowing you held onto it.

I hope this is helpful somehow. If you ever need to talk about it, I'm around. A complete stranger, sure, but the offer's there just the same. Tell Mary that someone she's never met is hoping the best for her and her family and friends.

[Pburgh]

Thierry, your experiences are now helping others thru their very difficult times. It's wonderful of you to reach out. I'm sure your Father knows how you felt and how you feel. At the time your Father was dying, you were still recovering yourself. I can't even imagine the negative thoughts you were rethinking. You know that you can't think of the should haves, could haves or would haves. You're a good person. Never forget that.

[Rainband]

I am sad to inform you all that Mary Lost her Battle with cancer this morning. Please know how grateful I am for all your thoughts and Prayers. I appreciate you all.

[DaylilyDawn]

((((Rainband))))) I hope you will remember that Mary will be with you as long as you remember the happy times you shared with her.

[Pburgh]

Special ((HUGS)) for you my friend. Please keep all those wonderful memories of Mary in your heart. Know that she is at peace and in a wonderful place where she no longer has any pain or suffering. She was so very brave and such an inspiration.

[CajunMama]

I'm sorry to hear this jonathan. I know words are of little comfort right now but try to remember she is at peace with no pain and that she will be looking down, watching over you, her friends and her family.

[vbhoutex]

Jonathan, I am not going to repeat everything above, as you know it is true. Know that there are big {{{{{HUGS}}}}} and many prayers headed your way from Houston.

[Category 5]

Deeply saddened to hear that. I lost my grandfather to lung cancer when I was 11 so I can feel your pain, you're all in my prayers.

[Rainband]

Thank you all.