The Cafeteria Lady—Spring Cleaning Time, Again. . . Already?
Posted: Tue Mar 02, 2004 3:06 pm
The Cafeteria Lady — Spring Cleaning Time, Again . . . Already?
by Martha Bolton
It’s spring and that means it’s time to start cleaning out some of those places you may have let pile up through the winter months. So, as a public service to Brio readers, here are a few tips on how you can know which area of your life might need the most immediate help.
You know cleaning time is long overdue in your room . . .
• if the milk in the glass on your nightstand matches the green in your comforter.
• if you catch your little brother tobogganing down your dirty clothes pile and you join him.
• if you’ve written more than three phone messages in the dust on your dresser.
• if you can hang ornaments from the cobwebs draping across your walls.
You know cleaning under your bed is the most crucial . . .
• if the dust balls have calcified and are large enough to bowl with.
• if there’s a “No Vacancy” sign on your roach motel for more than
three consecutive nights.
• if your mattress is starting to bulge upward.
• if there’s a glow coming from something in a fast-food bag.
You know your closet needs to be cleaned before anything else . . .
• if opening the door endangers everyone within a three-mile radius.
• if the moths are complaining about claustrophobia.
• if it takes mountain- climbing gear to work your way up to the top shelf.
• if you need a search and rescue team to find your cat who wandered in there four days ago.
You know your locker needs to be the first on your list . . .
• if more than three buzzards are circling it.
• if you can’t tell whether the sandwich that was left in there was tuna or peanut butter and jelly. (Especially because it looks more like tuna and jelly.)
• if you try to fold your gym shorts and they break in half.
• if you need the help of the varsity football team to close it.
• if it’s like a 24-hour Wal-Mart. It can’t close either.
by Martha Bolton
It’s spring and that means it’s time to start cleaning out some of those places you may have let pile up through the winter months. So, as a public service to Brio readers, here are a few tips on how you can know which area of your life might need the most immediate help.
You know cleaning time is long overdue in your room . . .
• if the milk in the glass on your nightstand matches the green in your comforter.
• if you catch your little brother tobogganing down your dirty clothes pile and you join him.
• if you’ve written more than three phone messages in the dust on your dresser.
• if you can hang ornaments from the cobwebs draping across your walls.
You know cleaning under your bed is the most crucial . . .
• if the dust balls have calcified and are large enough to bowl with.
• if there’s a “No Vacancy” sign on your roach motel for more than
three consecutive nights.
• if your mattress is starting to bulge upward.
• if there’s a glow coming from something in a fast-food bag.
You know your closet needs to be cleaned before anything else . . .
• if opening the door endangers everyone within a three-mile radius.
• if the moths are complaining about claustrophobia.
• if it takes mountain- climbing gear to work your way up to the top shelf.
• if you need a search and rescue team to find your cat who wandered in there four days ago.
You know your locker needs to be the first on your list . . .
• if more than three buzzards are circling it.
• if you can’t tell whether the sandwich that was left in there was tuna or peanut butter and jelly. (Especially because it looks more like tuna and jelly.)
• if you try to fold your gym shorts and they break in half.
• if you need the help of the varsity football team to close it.
• if it’s like a 24-hour Wal-Mart. It can’t close either.
