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the miracle of toilet paper
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 1:43 pm
by chadtm80
the miracle of toilet paper
The Miracle of Toilet Paper:
Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically
telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.
"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of
toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds". Willing to
try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the
mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I ask.
"They will grow larger over a period of years," he replies. I stop. "Do you
really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day
will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without missing a beat he
says, "Worked for your butt , didn't it?" He's still alive, and with a
great deal of therapy, may even walk again.
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 1:47 pm
by GalvestonDuck
If that was the case, wouldn't she think her hubby would use it too, instead of doing the "shake?"
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 1:57 pm
by stormraiser
Once Jen reads that, Chad, we'll pray that your recovery goes well
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 1:57 pm
by vbhoutex
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 2:07 pm
by HurricaneGirl
Very nice!!
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 2:09 pm
by Guest
Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings.
So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...
P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 2:18 pm
by GalvestonDuck
mrschad wrote:Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings.
So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...
P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.
LOL, yup!
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 2:31 pm
by Stephanie
mrschad wrote:Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings.
So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...
P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.
LOL!!!! It's going to get ugly at their house!!!
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 2:33 pm
by stormraiser
In the words of a fellow board member
GalvestonDuck wrote:LOL, yup!
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 5:21 pm
by southerngale
LOL!! Get 'em Jen!
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 5:39 pm
by Brent
mrschad wrote:Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings.
So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...
P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 7:20 pm
by Josephine96
LOL
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 8:38 pm
by azskyman
I doubt very much Chad that the fat lip you wake up with tomorrow will have anything at all to do with toilet paper. You may need it to stop the bleeding though.
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 8:40 pm
by mf_dolphin
CHAD FOR PRESIDENT!!!!
Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 8:58 pm
by timNms
Chad, you are in BIG trouble!
Now I need to go get a tissue to wipe the tears from my eyes. I'm laughing so hard!
Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 1:14 pm
by Pburgh
How did I miss this yesterday!!!!!!!!
ROTFLMAO
Chad?????? Are you there???????? Can you hear me??????
Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 2:09 pm
by Guest
Chad and I always joke with each other about the opposite sex. For years now, even our friends "play" boys against girls. This goes along with almost everything we do (from card games, to whose the smarter sex, to who has final say, etc). The women almost always hold the upper hand (we have to let the men win sometimes so that they'll keep playing along). I guess Chad figures since this is his and Marshall's board, that the men might have a fighting chance. Wrong!!! lol. When are men ever going to learn?
...Jennifer...
Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 2:25 pm
by Pburgh
I guess if they want a board where they can win, they should start and "all male" board!!!!!!!lol
Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 2:36 pm
by GalvestonDuck
Pburgh wrote:I guess if they want a board where they can win, they should start and "all male" board!!!!!!!lol
But then who's going to correct them when they're wrong and tease them when they're silly? They can't do that on their own.
Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 2:47 pm
by Pburgh
Oh Ducky, you're so wise. I didn't think of that!!!lol
