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Tough being a man

Posted: Fri May 02, 2003 10:39 am
by bfez1
My oh my...somebody sure got it right......



Do you know how tough it is being a man???

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you're a male chauvinist.
If you stay home and do the housework, you're a pansy.

If you work too hard there is never any time for her.
If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation.
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your ass and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favouritism.
If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.

If you cry, you're a wimp.
If you don't, you're an insensitive bastard.

If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist.
If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
If she asks you, it's a favour.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep shape, you're sexist.
If you don't, you're unromantic.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
If you don't, you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers, you're after something.
If you don't, you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements, you're full of yourself.
If you don't, you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she's tired.
If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

If you want it too often, you're oversexed.
If you don't, there must be someone else.

NO WONDER MEN DIE BEFORE WOMEN! THEY WANT TO!!

Posted: Fri May 02, 2003 11:03 am
by chadtm80
EXACTLY!!!! Geesh get off our backs would ya???????????? ROFLMAO

Posted: Fri May 02, 2003 12:04 pm
by mf_dolphin
Men are so misunderstood! ;-) YES DEAR!

Posted: Fri May 02, 2003 6:47 pm
by streetsoldier
Can y'all say, "AMEN"? "AMEN!...and, AMEN!" (Note that no church service would ever end without a-MEN around...) :wink:

Just ask Bronwyn where she'd be without "A-MAN-zi"... :lol:

Posted: Fri May 02, 2003 6:57 pm
by JetMaxx
ROFL!! Now you know why I'm not married...it's just too stressful :lol:

Posted: Sat May 03, 2003 3:47 am
by streetsoldier
"Bumpity-bump-bump-bump!" :wink:

Posted: Sat May 03, 2003 8:48 am
by mf_dolphin
If you say "YES DEAR!" a lot Perry the stress goes way down LOL (It took two divorces to figure that out ;-) ) - 17years now so I know what I'm talking about :-)

Posted: Sat May 03, 2003 8:50 am
by azsnowman
I wear the pants in the family (when she tells me to!)

Dennis

Posted: Sat May 03, 2003 8:54 am
by mf_dolphin
ROFLMAO Dennis.....I see you have a very happy marriage too ;-) When Vicki and I got married, we came to an understanding about money:

What's hers is hers
What's mine is hers
What's ours is hers

We've never had an arguement about money! I have any! :-)

Posted: Sat May 03, 2003 9:56 am
by Amanzi
streetsoldier wrote:Can y'all say, "AMEN"? "AMEN!...and, AMEN!" (Note that no church service would ever end without a-MEN around...) :wink:

Just ask Bronwyn where she'd be without "A-MAN-zi"... :lol:



Oh my goodness.. where would I be? :lol: But where would all the woMAN be too?

Posted: Sat May 03, 2003 10:13 pm
by pojo
women's problems are caused by men

MENopause
MENstral Period
MENace
MENstration