5 kinds of sex

Chat about anything and everything... (well almost anything) Whether it be the front porch or the pot belly stove or news of interest or a topic of your liking, this is the place to post it.

Moderator: S2k Moderators

Post Reply
Message
Author
User avatar
mf_dolphin
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 17758
Age: 68
Joined: Tue Oct 08, 2002 2:05 pm
Location: St Petersburg, FL
Contact:
Contact mf_dolphin

5 kinds of sex

#1 Postby mf_dolphin » Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:50 pm

5 Kinds of Sex

1) The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honeymoon period, you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face.

2) The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage, you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen.

3) The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom.

4) The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Screw you!"

5) There is also a fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom!
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
Lindaloo
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 22658
Joined: Sat Mar 29, 2003 10:06 am
Location: Pascagoula, MS

#2 Postby Lindaloo » Fri Dec 10, 2004 4:05 pm

:blow: :A:
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
sunny
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 7031
Joined: Fri Aug 06, 2004 2:11 pm
Location: New Orleans

#3 Postby sunny » Fri Dec 10, 2004 4:08 pm

:D Good ones!!
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
vbhoutex
Storm2k Executive
Storm2k Executive
Posts: 29114
Age: 73
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 11:31 pm
Location: Cypress, TX
Contact:
Contact vbhoutex

Re: 5 kinds of sex

#4 Postby vbhoutex » Fri Dec 10, 2004 4:16 pm

mf_dolphin wrote:5 Kinds of Sex

1) The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honeymoon period, you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face.

2) The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage, you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen.

3) The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom.

4) The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Screw you!"

5) There is also a fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom!


:notworthy: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :notworthy:
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
yoda
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:51 pm
Location: Springfield VA (20 mins south of DC)
Contact:
Contact yoda

#5 Postby yoda » Fri Dec 10, 2004 5:02 pm

LOL!! Good one Marshall!
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
vbhoutex
Storm2k Executive
Storm2k Executive
Posts: 29114
Age: 73
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 11:31 pm
Location: Cypress, TX
Contact:
Contact vbhoutex

#6 Postby vbhoutex » Fri Dec 10, 2004 5:24 pm

yoda wrote:LOL!! Good one Marshall!


Yoda, stop looking!! You are too young for this!!! :lol: :lol: :wink: :wink:
0 likes   
Skywarn, C.E.R.T.
Please click below to donate to STORM2K to help with the expenses of keeping the site going:
Image
Top
User avatar
breeze
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 9110
Age: 63
Joined: Sat Feb 08, 2003 4:55 pm
Location: Lawrenceburg, TN

#7 Postby breeze » Fri Dec 10, 2004 5:29 pm

Isn't sex the number after five, Marshall??? 8-) :lol:
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
yoda
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:51 pm
Location: Springfield VA (20 mins south of DC)
Contact:
Contact yoda

#8 Postby yoda » Fri Dec 10, 2004 6:22 pm

vbhoutex wrote:
yoda wrote:LOL!! Good one Marshall!


Yoda, stop looking!! You are too young for this!!! :lol: :lol: :wink: :wink:


Too young? I don't think so David. I am of legal age, you know... :wink: :wink: :D :D

Don't worry, I am here to back up the guys!! :P
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
JenBayles
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 3461
Age: 62
Joined: Tue Aug 26, 2003 3:27 pm
Location: Houston, TX
Contact:
Contact JenBayles

#9 Postby JenBayles » Fri Dec 10, 2004 6:33 pm

yoda wrote:Don't worry, I am here to back up the guys!! :P


Sadly, a losing battle..... youth and inexperience shall never overcome old age and treachery.
:sadly: :hehe: :slime:
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
yoda
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:51 pm
Location: Springfield VA (20 mins south of DC)
Contact:
Contact yoda

#10 Postby yoda » Fri Dec 10, 2004 6:36 pm

JenBayles wrote:
yoda wrote:Don't worry, I am here to back up the guys!! :P


Sadly, a losing battle..... youth and inexperience shall never overcome old age and treachery.
:sadly: :hehe: :slime:


I don't think so. Remember, I am the Jedi Master Yoda. :D :D :D

I can hold my ground. Bring it on! :P

Don't worry men!! Matt is here! :grrr:
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
JenBayles
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 3461
Age: 62
Joined: Tue Aug 26, 2003 3:27 pm
Location: Houston, TX
Contact:
Contact JenBayles

#11 Postby JenBayles » Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:13 pm

yoda wrote:
JenBayles wrote:
yoda wrote:Don't worry, I am here to back up the guys!! :P


Sadly, a losing battle..... youth and inexperience shall never overcome old age and treachery.
:sadly: :hehe: :slime:


I don't think so. Remember, I am the Jedi Master Yoda. :D :D :D

I can hold my ground. Bring it on! :P

Don't worry men!! Matt is here! :grrr:


Careful! I'm one of those bad things that happen to good people.
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
yoda
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:51 pm
Location: Springfield VA (20 mins south of DC)
Contact:
Contact yoda

#12 Postby yoda » Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:23 pm

JenBayles wrote:
yoda wrote:
JenBayles wrote:
yoda wrote:Don't worry, I am here to back up the guys!! :P


Sadly, a losing battle..... youth and inexperience shall never overcome old age and treachery.
:sadly: :hehe: :slime:


I don't think so. Remember, I am the Jedi Master Yoda. :D :D :D

I can hold my ground. Bring it on! :P

Don't worry men!! Matt is here! :grrr:


Careful! I'm one of those bad things that happen to good people.


You are? What bad could happen to me? :P
0 likes   
Top
weatherlover427

#13 Postby weatherlover427 » Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:25 pm

JenBayles wrote:
yoda wrote:
JenBayles wrote:
yoda wrote:Don't worry, I am here to back up the guys!! :P


Sadly, a losing battle..... youth and inexperience shall never overcome old age and treachery.
:sadly: :hehe: :slime:


I don't think so. Remember, I am the Jedi Master Yoda. :D :D :D

I can hold my ground. Bring it on! :P

Don't worry men!! Matt is here! :grrr:


Careful! I'm one of those bad things that happen to good people.


*backs away slowly then runs as fast as he can for the exit door*
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
bfez1
S2K Supporter
S2K Supporter
Posts: 6548
Joined: Thu Oct 10, 2002 10:14 am
Location: Meraux--10 mi E of New Orleans-totally destroyed by Katrina
Contact:
Contact bfez1

#14 Postby bfez1 » Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:40 pm

:lol: Those are to cute!!!
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
JenBayles
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 3461
Age: 62
Joined: Tue Aug 26, 2003 3:27 pm
Location: Houston, TX
Contact:
Contact JenBayles

#15 Postby JenBayles » Fri Dec 10, 2004 9:13 pm

to the moon.....
Last edited by JenBayles on Sat Dec 11, 2004 8:37 am, edited 1 time in total.
0 likes   
Top
ColdFront77

#16 Postby ColdFront77 » Fri Dec 10, 2004 11:54 pm

Something I thought I'd never see on Storm2K.
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
JenBayles
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 3461
Age: 62
Joined: Tue Aug 26, 2003 3:27 pm
Location: Houston, TX
Contact:
Contact JenBayles

#17 Postby JenBayles » Sat Dec 11, 2004 8:39 am

ColdFront77 wrote:Something I thought I'd never see on Storm2K.

<considers herself chastised. Slinks out door>
0 likes   
Top
User avatar
yoda
Category 5
Category 5
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:51 pm
Location: Springfield VA (20 mins south of DC)
Contact:
Contact yoda

#18 Postby yoda » Sat Dec 11, 2004 8:47 am

JenBayles wrote:
ColdFront77 wrote:Something I thought I'd never see on Storm2K.

<considers herself chastised. Slinks out door>


So this means I am the last one in here? Do I win the battle? :lol:
0 likes   
Top
kevin

#19 Postby kevin » Sat Dec 11, 2004 10:51 am

Coldfront sayth

O the morals! O the times!

I sayth

funny!!! Men we must unite. We can take back the world from the women who control our paychecks and try to put healthy food on the table. Down with the new order!

=D
0 likes   
Top
Post Reply

Return to “Off Topic”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 32 guests