STORM2K

This is interesting..

Missing Texas student found after 7 years
Working at Sam's Club in Kentucky
Monday, June 6, 2005 Posted: 9:52 AM EDT (1352 GMT)

BRYAN, Texas (AP) -- A Texas A&M University student who had been feared murdered after disappearing nearly seven years ago has been found alive and working in Kentucky, according to authorities.

Brandi Stahr went missing in October 1998, and police spent hours searching for her body in wooded areas. They questioned a serial rapist and murderer about her just hours before he was executed last year.

But a telephone tip led investigators to Florence, Kentucky, where Stahr has been working for the last five years at a Sam's Club, said Texas Ranger Frank Malinak.

"We thought we were dealing with a missing persons case," Malinak said. "But, in actuality, we were dealing with a person who did not want to be found and was in hiding."

Stahr, 27, hid from her family after she and her mother, Ann Dickenson, got into an argument over bad grades she received during her sophomore year and her family stopped paying for school.

For the last five years, Stahr worked under her real name, using her Social Security number. But police said they were unable to locate her that way because they don't have access to IRS records.

Dickenson and Stahr haven't reunited yet, but have talked on the phone. Stahr told her sister the family should not bother visiting, but her mother said nothing will stop her.

"We're going. I'm going. Even if I have to sit out in a (Sam's Club) parking lot to see her," Dickenson said.

Although Stahr committed no crime in her disappearance, investigators spent a lot of money and time looking for her, Malinak said.

"The responsible thing to do would have been to let someone know you're OK," Malinak said. "There are going to be people expending man-hours and effort, trying to find a missing person."

That is a cruel thing to do to her family. Making them go through that pain thinking their child was dead for 7 years. And for what? Just over some silly argument over bad grades and not paying for school? She could of at least called her mother and let her know she was okay. She is very selfish and has a lot of growing up to do.

I thought this was a very selfish thing to do also. To let others think you're deceased, but to go on living, is very self centered. I shudder to think what type of mother she'd make someday.

Mary

This girl needs serious help. How could she do this to her family?
Will she be prosecuted like the "run away bride" Jennifer???I know, she didn't call police and make a false report!

it sounds like something one of my daughters would do. seriously.

Befz 1,

I saw some report on the news this morning that said she won't be prosecuted like the Runaway Bride because she didn't do anything illegal (i.e. like false allegations against anyone else). Also, the Texas Rangers failed to run her social security number to see if she was somewhere else-- she's been working at Sam's Club for years there.

Apparently, she & her mom had some big fight so she skipped town and started a new life. I suspect we haven't heard the whole story-- it takes a lot for someone that young to break all ties completely.

chris

cajungal wrote:That is a cruel thing to do to her family. Making them go through that pain thinking their child was dead for 7 years. And for what? Just over some silly argument over bad grades and not paying for school? She could of at least called her mother and let her know she was okay. She is very selfish and has a lot of growing up to do.

I agree. Parents being at odds with their children over grades and school tuition may be cause for some tension; to just vanish like that is immature and uncalled for.

i was thinking that we've only heard one side of the story. Apparently law enforcement didnt have access to the IRS system, so they couldnt track where she was.

i know there was a time where my mom had no idea where i was. i was an adult and not hiding or anything. it was probably 6 years that we didnt talk or correspond, due to a huge fight.

fortunately, i swallowed my pride and took the first step to recovery in our relationship. we had an incredible two years before she passed away at 59 years old in 1998.

Related, followed up story from my daily paper. From the parents' point of view.

http://news.enquirer.com/apps/pbcs.dll/ ... /506070357

Mary

There may be a lot more to this story. Somehow the parents' story does not quite ring true. I'm sure it was more than an argument about grades and the credit card story sounds odd.

This woman, while violating no laws, chose to "disappear." As the police point out, she had no driver's license, no credit cards, was very careful to keep a very low profile. That is actually quite difficult and restrictive to do and requires an awful lot of determination and self-discipline. You don't do that just because of an argument over grades/college tuition and you also don't do that over credit card bills. Notice that this is someone who had at some time become accustomed to carrying a credit card.

By the way, when my daughter went off to college, she had a credit card--but it was not for "groceries." That is a sort of micromanagement of your child that really is inappropriate. I'm just responding to the odd choice of words the parents used--most people would say what I did when my daughter went off to college--that the credit card was for "emergencies" as well as for agreed-upon expenses. But yes, a kid who puts "thousands" on a credit card may not be exceeding the rules (even if the parents do get "sticker shock."). For example, my daughter put books on her credit card at the beginning of the semester--we're talking textbooks--some at $80 a pop! If your kid takes 5 courses/semester, you probably can count on $1,000 in textbooks--more if they take certain courses. Then there are lab fees, medical deductibles, car maintenance and repairs if your child needs a car at college (e.g., to get to work, etc.) and yes, even if the card is not used for anything else than what is listed, you will have "thousands" on the credit card over the semester. But most kids pay for groceries out of their allowance, earnings from part time jobs, etc. Normally that's not what you would give a college-bound child a credit card for.

I'd be inclined to wonder about this also in light of the parents' refusal to pay for school in sophomore year. Freshmen often get into trouble over grades--but usually if you make it through your freshman year, people's (both parents and the student) expectations are more realistic. It sounds as if perhaps they stopped paying in mid-semester or something... That would make someone disappear... Usually parents would not stop paying in the middle of a semester--they would just not pay for a subsequent semester. There is a whole bunch more to this story.

Persepone wrote:There may be a lot more to this story. Somehow the parents' story does not quite ring true. I'm sure it was more than an argument about grades and the credit card story sounds odd.

This woman, while violating no laws, chose to "disappear." As the police point out, she had no driver's license, no credit cards, was very careful to keep a very low profile. That is actually quite difficult and restrictive to do and requires an awful lot of determination and self-discipline. You don't do that just because of an argument over grades/college tuition and you also don't do that over credit card bills. Notice that this is someone who had at some time become accustomed to carrying a credit card.

By the way, when my daughter went off to college, she had a credit card--but it was not for "groceries." That is a sort of micromanagement of your child that really is inappropriate. I'm just responding to the odd choice of words the parents used--most people would say what I did when my daughter went off to college--that the credit card was for "emergencies" as well as for agreed-upon expenses. But yes, a kid who puts "thousands" on a credit card may not be exceeding the rules (even if the parents do get "sticker shock."). For example, my daughter put books on her credit card at the beginning of the semester--we're talking textbooks--some at $80 a pop! If your kid takes 5 courses/semester, you probably can count on $1,000 in textbooks--more if they take certain courses. Then there are lab fees, medical deductibles, car maintenance and repairs if your child needs a car at college (e.g., to get to work, etc.) and yes, even if the card is not used for anything else than what is listed, you will have "thousands" on the credit card over the semester. But most kids pay for groceries out of their allowance, earnings from part time jobs, etc. Normally that's not what you would give a college-bound child a credit card for.

I'd be inclined to wonder about this also in light of the parents' refusal to pay for school in sophomore year. Freshmen often get into trouble over grades--but usually if you make it through your freshman year, people's (both parents and the student) expectations are more realistic. It sounds as if perhaps they stopped paying in mid-semester or something... That would make someone disappear... Usually parents would not stop paying in the middle of a semester--they would just not pay for a subsequent semester. There is a whole bunch more to this story.

I agree...no one would go to that much effort to "disappear" unless they had a VERY good reason, and the parents aren't exactly being as candid as they should be. The young lady wishing to live her life alone, w/o ties, says more than one might suspect on the surface.