St. Peter and Clinton!!
Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2003 3:26 pm
The scene: HEAVEN The year: 2031 President Clinton finishes his time on
earth and approaches the Pearly Gates of Heaven. "And who might you
be?" inquires St. Peter.
"It's me, Bill Clinton, formerly the President of the United States and
Leader of the Free World."
"Oh... Mr. President! What may I do for you?" asks St. Peter.
"I'd like to come in," replies Clinton.
"Sure," says the Saint, "but first you have to confess your sins. What
bad things have you done in your life?"
Clinton bites his lip and answers, "Well, I tried marijuana, but you
can't call it 'dope smoking' because I didn't inhale. There were
inappropriate extramarital relationships, but you can't call it
'adultery' because I didn't have full 'sexual relations' And I made some
statements that were misleading, but legally accurate, but you can't
call it 'bearing false witness' because, as far as I know, it didn't
meet the legal standard of perjury."
With that, St. Peter consults the Book of Life briefly, and declares,
"OK, here's the deal. We'll send you somewhere hot, but we won't call
it Hell.' You'll be there indefinitely, but we won't call it 'eternity.'
And when you enter, you don't have to 'abandon all hope,' just don't
hold your breath waiting for it to freeze over."
earth and approaches the Pearly Gates of Heaven. "And who might you
be?" inquires St. Peter.
"It's me, Bill Clinton, formerly the President of the United States and
Leader of the Free World."
"Oh... Mr. President! What may I do for you?" asks St. Peter.
"I'd like to come in," replies Clinton.
"Sure," says the Saint, "but first you have to confess your sins. What
bad things have you done in your life?"
Clinton bites his lip and answers, "Well, I tried marijuana, but you
can't call it 'dope smoking' because I didn't inhale. There were
inappropriate extramarital relationships, but you can't call it
'adultery' because I didn't have full 'sexual relations' And I made some
statements that were misleading, but legally accurate, but you can't
call it 'bearing false witness' because, as far as I know, it didn't
meet the legal standard of perjury."
With that, St. Peter consults the Book of Life briefly, and declares,
"OK, here's the deal. We'll send you somewhere hot, but we won't call
it Hell.' You'll be there indefinitely, but we won't call it 'eternity.'
And when you enter, you don't have to 'abandon all hope,' just don't
hold your breath waiting for it to freeze over."
...another in a great line of Clinton meets St Peter jokes
