Science Exam Answers
Posted: Wed May 24, 2006 10:33 pm
These are (supposedly) real answers to science/health exams given to students.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to
drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large
pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends
to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon,
and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where ! the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized?
A: The body is consisted into three parts---the brainium, the borax and
the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax
contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the
five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Explain the term "Caesarean Section."
A: A district in ancient Rome.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to
drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large
pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends
to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon,
and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where ! the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized?
A: The body is consisted into three parts---the brainium, the borax and
the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax
contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the
five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Explain the term "Caesarean Section."
A: A district in ancient Rome.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
