STORM2K

Well, I just bought me another car the day before yesterday. 2003 Honda Civic. Silver, fully loaded, sunroof, 4-door car. I got in a bad wreck on October 17th when a guy ran straight through the red light at the intersection and I totaled my car. A little red Honda Civic. I was amazed I was not hurt as bad as the damage was. But, now I am having severe anxiety problems. So terrified that I will get in another wreck. Terrified someone will run the intersection and hit me again. I drove to work by myself of course and was all tensed up especially on the ride home with rush hour traffic. I still never got the courage to drive to my boyfriend's house yet. Because I was driving back from his house the night that the wreck happened and it was late and it was raining. I keep having constant flashbacks from that night and it has been nearly 6 weeks. I don't know how to get past this. Because right now he claims he has having problems with his car and we have not seen each other in 9 days. I don't want people to think I am crazy because I just bought a really nice car, yet never want to drive it unless I half to. I am just terrified the most of that intersection that I must cross to get home from my boyfriends house. I was being very careful that night but someone plowed right through the intersection on red. The sound of crunching metal is something I will never, ever forget. I don't have insurance and can't afford to go to a pshyctriast. So, I am thinking of trying to go to my family doctor and get back on my anxiety medication. Was on Lexapro but got off, because I did not want to rely on meds to deal with my depression and anxiety for the rest of my life.

I know I am alive, but I keep thinking that the next time I won't be. Or I will kill someone else. I might not have been driving but I did lose a very good friend of mine. I was supposed to have ridden home with him but found another ride at the last minute. He was killed on his way to work and I saw him 15 minutes before the wreck happened.

Going back on lexapro (or any other antidepressant) doesn't mean you'll have to be on it the rest of your life. If it will help you over this "hump", why not get back on it and see how you do? You can always try to get back off when you get past the stress of the accident.

I take lexapro religiously, and have no problem at all admitting I NEED IT! Do I care if I have to take it forever? NO! There is no shame in having to take these kinds of meds, and if they help you, take 'em. Simple as that.

I have had 2 bad wrecks in my life and to this day the sound of the metal crunching is still with me. It will always be with you. You must let it serve as something good and not something bad. Let it remind you to take that extra second to be twice as sure that the roads are clear.

What I did after my second wreck was take an advanced driving course. I basically was trained to the same level as police drivers are. The awareness i gained is amazing and that helped me overcome the emotional side of things. It took a while to get my confidence back, but with time and some extra education I am a better more confident driver for it.

Take your time, you can only overcome something like this as and when you are ready to.

nholley has good advice. The worst thing you can do is decide not to drive again. You are so young canungal and I know you want to be independent. I have two relatives who do not drive and let me just say, it has definitely affected their habits and lifestyle. My mom is one, she'd be a menace on the road and I mean it. So I'm glad she never drove! She looks at everything but the road when in a car (landscaping, houses, etc.) The other is my 46 year old SIL. She is very independent and quite self sufficient. She can remodel a home as good as or better than a man. Better than her husband (my brother), that's for sure! This is one aspect of her personality that just does not fit. She has said over and over again, she wished she had conquered her fear when she was much younger.

So do what you have to, to come to terms with what happened, take good memories of your friend with you and move on. It won't be easy, but it can be done.

I wish you well.

Mary

4 years ago I was rear ended by a drunk driver and was seriously injured.I don't even remember the wreck,all I remember is stopping at a red light and then waking up in a ambulance.After I recovered physically,it took months for me to get the courage to get back behind the wheel.My girlfriend had to drive me wherever I needed to go because I was too afraid to drive.It took a while but eventually I started to forget about the wreck and just moved on.But even to this day I am a different driver,much more cautious and aware of my surroundings.Every red light or stop sign I stop at I look in my rear view mirror at who's coming up behind me.

I understand what you're going through.Try and give it some time.Spend some time with your family or friends to get your mind off the wreck,that helped me.

It is hard to get through. When I was 18 a driver ran a stop sign and plowed into me. Thank god I was driving my dad's huge crown victoria or else I would have been seriously hurt. Even now 20 years later, I still slow down when I come up to certain intersections and take a peek both ways. I don't stop, just let up on the gas. You do need to get back in your car and try and get over your fear. If you keep putting it off it will get harder and harder.

I am getting back into my car. I drove to and from work by myself in it yesterday. And the same today. I drove in 5:00 rush hour traffic yesterday and it will be the same today. I just avoid driving certain areas if I can help it. I still have not had enough courage to drive to my boyfriend's house yet. Because it was heading back from his house that the guy ran the red light and I plowed right into him. And I have no choice but to go through that intersection to get home. Maybe by next week I will feel a little better about it.

Cajungal, the only thing I can tell you is that it will get better. I know how you feel though. One of the first times I was driving on my own I was hit by another car. After that my foot would shake involuntarily when I would try to drive. But everytime I drove after that and nothing bad happened I began to regain my confidence a little bit at a time. You will too.

And if the Lexapro helps, I would see my doctor. If there is something that helps there really isn't any point in letting yourself suffer. Sometimes anxiety and depression can snowball. I would explain to my doctor that this is a situational thing

Believe it or not, you will be a better driver from this point on. Anxiety is not totally negative, in fact I find it keeps me alert. As you may know, I ride a motorcycle almost every day. Ask anybody that rides, and they have most likely seen their life flash before them several times. I seriously think that each time this happens to me, I become that much better of a driver. I’m not sure if it’s anxiety, but I have my guard up at all times, and never take another driver (or myself), for granted.

I’m not suggesting that this accident could have been avoided, but one thing I’ve learned from being out of a cage, is to look at every approaching intersection, as having the potential to be fatal. That doesn’t mean tense up and forget which is the brake and which is the gas. It simply means always prepare for the possibility that something might go wrong, and have a plan in your head BEFORE reaching the intersection, on how to avoid the collision.

Best of luck with the new car and happy driving.

* watch out for the motorcycles *

That certainly was a horrifying experience. Talking to your family doctor about your fear is a very good idea.

Also, taking medication like Lexapro for anxiety and/or depression is like taking insulin for diabetes: it's not a matter of will or of weakness.; it's a correction for a malfunction of body chemistry. Period.

Good luck!

You NEED to stay on your medication. You HAVE to realize and accept the fact that you probably will need to take it for the rest of your life. It took me a while to accept it. I was angry and resentful but I know that it is GIVING me a life.

It's understandable that you don't want to drive far and only when necessary. It was a scary experience. Just take baby steps and GET BACK ON YOUR MEDS!!

I can certainly sympathize with your situation. When I was a child I was in a car accident and for five or six years the only way I could get in a car was by sitting on the floor in the back seat with my head tucked down. Believe me it was hot, no AC then. I finally got over my fear but it was extremely difficult for me to learn to drive. I would still not be driving if it wasn't for my mother. She called a driving school, shoved me out the door and locked it. I was driving in three days. I was rear ended and my fear took over again, but I got back driving right away, but the fear and anxiety was really bad for a month and it took a year for me to feel completely comfortable. There is an area that I try to avoid because even now years and years later, I will just fall to pieces. Time will heal your wounds. Just take it one day at a time.

Cajungal, you are doing so well. I think you've made wonderful progress for all that you've been thru. I'm proud of you!!!! Please call your doctor and get your meds refilled. Why should you suffer thru this when you know lexapro will help you. ((HUGS))

I have been making process. Tommorow will make a week since I bought the car. I have been driving back and forth to work (9 miles) every day by myself. And so far everything is fine. I just slow down at intersections even if there is a green light, just in case someone decides to dart through anyway. I even drove to my boyfriends house at night for the first time since the wreck Sat night. I was still very nervous because I noticed a couple of car still going straight through the intersection even though I had the green light. So, I still look both ways and slow down a little when I approach an intersection even though it is controlled by a traffic light. Every day it gets a little better, but I feel some degree of my fear will always be there.

About 10 years ago I was involved in an accident about a mile from where I live now. Got rear ended by a drunk driver at a stoplight and the state trooper estimated the guy was doing about 50 at the time. Got slammed into the car in front of me and the beautiful Sundance that my dad had just bought and let me use that day looked like an accordion. I sustained a neck injury that still bothers me now, plus a concussion. The paramedics were amazed I wasnt badly injured and credited that to me wearing my seat belt. The state trooper was equally amazed that he had arrested the same drunk just TWO WEEKS earlier for..you guessed it..DUI. Spent the nite in the hospital since I wasnt making sense when I talked (not that I ever make sense anyway lol) and didnt drive for several days due to me being unable to move my neck much at all. Well I got a lot better after physical therapy; I have to admit that even now I try to avoid that intersection. Im a lot more aware now of whats going on behind me and am very wary of anyone approaching me fast from behind. Cajungal your degree of fear..as u put it..is understandable. Been there.

I've ran into a guardrail at 40 mph while getting onto the freeway when I first starting to drive. Yes, I am still here (I was only shook up), and although I was a little apprehensive about getting behind the wheel, I drive a lot (but I avoid the freeway for right now). But, yeah, I know what you mean. It is a job just to get to where you are going anymore. I have seen several near-accidents the last month. People weaving back and forth just to get ahead of someone going the speed limit and those that follow two closely because of a slow mover drive (no pun intended) up a wall.

I had a young lady several months ago honk and give that "what you doing?" look at me because I would not go through a yellow light. Hey, I had a safe time to stop for the yellow and subsequent red. I am not going through unless I am moving too fast for safe stop.

You will get over it! If I can get over worrying about everything under the sun, you can!