The Stupid Crimes & Misdemeanors Thread

[TexasStooge]

Woman Allegedly Tries to Buy Pot From Cops

WEST FARGO, N.D. (AP) - A North Dakota State University student is facing charges after allegedly trying to buy marijuana at the police station.

Saturday's incident was "about the craziest thing I've ever come across," Officer Ken Zeeb said. "This is something that you couldn't even make up."

The 20-year-old woman called the police station about 3:15 a.m. Saturday, asking where she could buy marijuana, authorities said. The dispatcher, after repeatedly telling the woman it was illegal to sell and possess marijuana, then told her that police had some of the drug in the station's evidence locker.

Zeeb had arrived for his 4 a.m. shift about 15 minutes early and was in the evidence locker room when the woman arrived.

"The dispatcher got on the intercom and said, 'You know what? She's here. She just handed me $3 for marijuana,'" Zeeb said.

The woman was arrested on charges of criminal attempt and possession of drug paraphernalia.

"She didn't seem like she was really under the influence of drugs or alcohol," Zeeb said. "She understood what was going on and articulated herself well."
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Information from: The Forum

[TexasStooge]

Rooftop burglar leaves a note at Ft. Worth store

FORT WORTH, Texas (The Dallas Morning News) - A burglar who entered a Fort Worth store from the roof left a note for employees overnight before getting away with cash from the store’s safe.

Fort Worth police Lt. Dean Sullivan said the manager of a Linens ‘n Things store in the 4600 block of South Hulen Street called police about 7 a.m. Tuesday to report a break-in.

Investigators determined the burglar or burglars entered the store by cutting a hole in the roof and gaining access to the ventilation system. They were able to reach the store’s floor 25 feet below and enter the office, where they cut open the safe.

One of the burglars left a note scrawled in marker on a dry-erase board in the store’s break room which read, “HAPPY B-DAY FROM UR FRIENDY ROOFTOP BOOGLAR” along with the date.

Lt. Sullivan said the burglars got away with an undetermined amount of cash. An investigation is under way, but so far there are no leads.

A group dubbed the Rooftop Burglars used similar methods to strike businesses in Fort Worth, Bridgeport, Grand Prairie, Denton, Arlington and Lewisville over the last 18 months, but in January police in Bridgeport arrested 14 suspects thought to be involved in the ring. Police have not determined if Tuesday's incident is related to the previous break-ins.

Anyone with information regarding Tuesday's burglary can call (817) 871-5005.

[rainstorm]

maybe next time the roof top boogler will fall and break his neck

[TexasStooge]

Man Obsessed With Doorknobs Faces Prison

PORT WASHINGTON, Wis. (AP) - A man who claims he is obsessed with doorknobs faces three years in prison for a burglary spree in which dozens of them were taken from construction sites, along with tools and other materials.

A criminal complaint said Thor Jeffrey Steven Laufer told police he took a variety of items from the construction sites in the Milwaukee suburb of Mequon to disguise his obsession, "so that it would look like a typical burglary rather than someone just stealing doorknobs."

Laufer, 43, of Racine, was sentenced this week by Ozaukee County Circuit Judge Joseph McCormack to the three-year prison term, plus five years of extended supervision, and ordered to pay restitution. He had pleaded no contest to felony counts of burglary.

The thefts occurred in December 2004. Laufer also faces charges in Milwaukee County for similar incidents in suburban Franklin.

[TexasStooge]

Tree Mascot Fired for Alleged Drunkenness

STANFORD, Calif. (AP) - A rowdy Stanford University mascot was fired after being discovered drunk during a basketball game, university officials said.

Fifth-year senior Erin Lashnits, who dresses as a tree for the university's irreverent band, was stripped of her duties last week after her blood-alcohol level was measured at 0.157 during a men's basketball game at the University of California, Berkeley. For the purposes of driving a vehicle in California, legally drunk is .08.

Stanford went on to lose the Feb. 9 game 65-62.

The university had previously placed the band on "alcohol suspension," which requires a zero-tolerance policy toward drunkenness, said band spokesman Sam Urmy. Lashnits was fired to avoid disciplinary penalties from the athletic department, Urmy said.

"We don't want to risk our core mission of rocking out and bringing funk to the funkless," Urmy said.
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Information from: San Jose Mercury News

[TexasStooge]

Burglary Victim Charged With Burglary

MEMPHIS, Tenn. (AP) - A burglary victim got a surprise after filing a statement with police. He was charged with burglary himself.

Clarence Dodson, 47, was arrested while talking with detectives about a 14-year-old neighbor police suspected of breaking into his house.

Dodson, who wasn't home when the teenager was discovered in his house, was located at another residence Tuesday and officers offered him a ride downtown to file a crime report.

He wasn't told until later that police were at his home looking for him when they happened upon the teenager.

Dodson was charged with burglarizing a Memphis residence last week.

In that break-in, a man and a woman came home to find a stranger in the home. Police say the couple gave the burglar a sound thrashing, using feet, fists and a hockey stick but he got away.
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Information from: The Commercial Appeal

[rainstorm]

Tree Mascot Fired for Alleged Drunkenness

STANFORD, Calif. (AP) - A rowdy Stanford University mascot was fired after being discovered drunk during a basketball game, university officials said.

Fifth-year senior Erin Lashnits, who dresses as a tree for the university's irreverent band, was stripped of her duties last week after her blood-alcohol level was measured at 0.157 during a men's basketball game at the University of California, Berkeley. For the purposes of driving a vehicle in California, legally drunk is .08.

Stanford went on to lose the Feb. 9 game 65-62.

The university had previously placed the band on "alcohol suspension," which requires a zero-tolerance policy toward drunkenness, said band spokesman Sam Urmy. Lashnits was fired to avoid disciplinary penalties from the athletic department, Urmy said.

"We don't want to risk our core mission of rocking out and bringing funk to the funkless," Urmy said.
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Information from: San Jose Mercury News

i thought drinking was required at college

[TexasStooge]

Man Allegedly Bites Off Girlfriend's Nose

TULSA, Okla. (AP) - A family sitting down to dinner had to call police and an ambulance after a man allegedly bit off the nose of his girlfriend, authorities said.

Jody Bennett came out of a back room of a north Tulsa residence on Thursday with a napkin over her face and said her boyfriend, identified as Greg Hill, had bitten her nose.

Medics responding to the house saw that Bennett's nose had been severed and called police.

"We looked around and tried to find a nose but couldn't find it," Cpl. Larry Edwards, a police spokesman, said. "I think he swallowed it."

An ambulance took Bennett, 37, to a local hospital where police talked to emergency room personnel about pumping Hill's stomach to see if the nose was inside, police Cpl. Shane Tuell said.

"They said, given the acid in the stomach, that it would be a futile effort to try and do that," Tuell said.

The nose is made primarily of cartilage and other soft tissues that stomach acid can dissolve quickly.

The couple live in California, and the other people at the house didn't know what led to the assault, Tuell said.

Officers used pepper spray on Hill, 45, after tussling with him as they tried to take him into the custody, Edwards said.

Hill denied biting Bennett's nose, police said.

He was booked into the Tulsa Jail on complaints of aggravated assault and battery, resisting arrest and destroying evidence.

Bennett could receive help from domestic violence groups to recover from her injury if she cooperates with Hill's prosecution should a criminal charge be filed, Tuell said.

[TexasStooge]

Guy seeks police help for something moronic

BERLIN, Germany (Reuters) - A 52-year-old man from the German town of Darmstadt tried in vain to get a refund for 400 euros ($475) worth of what he said was "bad marijuana" from his dealer before turning to the police for help, according to authorities.

The police then charged the man with violating drugs possession laws and confiscated the 200 grams of marijuana he brought with him to the police station, according to a report in Bild am Sonntag newspaper Sunday.

"It is un-usable," the man told police in the hope they would help him get his money back. Amounts of up to 30 grams of marijuana are allowed in most German states for private consumption.

[TexasStooge]

Drunk drivers required to play games with elderly

TAIPEI, Taiwan (Court TV/AP) — Drunk drivers in Taiwan can now choose their penalty: Pay a fine or play mahjong with the elderly.

Petty criminals in Taiwan are increasingly being handed a variety of civil duties rather than serving time in prison or cleaning the streets, said Hsu Yi-ling, an official at the Taoyuan Prosecutors Office in northern Taiwan.

Playing the popular Chinese tile game of mahjong with token money has taught offenders to love and care for the elderly, Hsu said.

"The offenders first dismissed the duty as wasting time, but they soon discovered they were respected and drew satisfaction from helping the elderly," Hsu said.

Instead of jail terms, the Taiwan government has encouraged prosecutors to hand out civil service duties to petty criminals, such as first-time burglars and those posting nude pictures on the Internet, she said.

[TexasStooge]

Police: Man left 'stolen stuff' sign inside house

KELSO, Wash. (AP) — The note inside the house made it clear to Cowlitz County sheriff's deputies that they had the right place: "Do not open door & let anyone in! Stolen Stuff visable."

Within a day, investigators confirmed that antiques, furniture, jewelry, credit cards and at least 19 guns found in the home of Gerald Levertt Mack had been stolen from at least 12 people, deputy Charles J. Rosenzweig said.

"Nothing like helping us figure out what's going on," Rosenzweig said.

Mack, 40, was arrested early Sunday after a standoff that began the previous evening, when a witness said Mack had entered his home. Deputies returned later Sunday with a search warrant.

Mack was jailed for investigation of first-degree burglary and residential burglary. Bail was set at $30,000.

[TexasStooge]

Police Identify Man With 'Cecil' Tattoo

COLUMBUS, Ind. (AP) - Officers began to suspect that the man they pulled over was lying when he identified himself as Robert despite a tattoo with the name Cecil on the back of his neck.

They arrested Cecil S. Carmer, 25, of Indianapolis and charged him with false informing, said Maj. Mark Gorbett of Bartholomew County Sheriff's Department.

After being pulled over for driving erratically, Carmer had identified himself as his brother Robert.

Sheriff's deputies also found equipment and ingredients used to make methamphetamine in Carmer's car, Gorbett said.

"The guy was ready to cook," he said.

Carmer also was charged with possession of anhydrous ammonia and other ingredients for making meth and with driving with a suspended license. He was being held Tuesday on $90,500 bond at Bartholomew County Jail.
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Information from: The Republic

[TexasStooge]

Police Say Burglar Sniffed Out His Victims

TOKYO, Japan (AP) - A Japanese man arrested for alleged burglary picked his victims by sniffing women's homes for expensive perfume, police said Wednesday.

Seiichi Shirota, 46, sniffed at the doors of potential targets for expensive women's perfume to determine if the occupant was a single woman likely to own a collection of expensive designer bags, watches and jewelry, according to Kanagawa prefectural (state) police spokesman Tsuneo Kosuge.

The suspect was arrested on Dec. 23 last year for allegedly stealing three rings worth about 300,000 yen ($2,530) after breaking into a woman's apartment in Yokohama, near Tokyo, Kosuge said.

Shirota told police he relied on his smelling abilities to target apartments of single women. The alleged thief also made sure laundry hanging from a clothesline at a balcony included no men's underwear, according to Kosugi.

Police have linked the suspect to about 200 cases of robbery worth an estimated 60 million yen ($506,000).

[TexasStooge]

Police: Homeless Man Tries to Steal Sheep

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) - A homeless man who police say tried to take a sheep from the Little Rock Zoo has been arrested on numerous charges. A security guard at the zoo called police Tuesday evening after spotting a man carrying a trash can with a sheep in it, a police report said.

When officers arrived Grady Allen Carnahan, 32, told them he was a doctor and the sheep was sick. He said he was taking the animal to a veterinary clinic, the report said.

Carnahan fought with officers as they were trying to take him into custody, police said.

He was arrested on a felony charge of violating an animal facility and on misdemeanor charges of criminal trespass, cruelty to animals, resisting arrest, and theft of property.

The animal was returned to its pen at the zoo.

[TexasStooge]

Man Gets 3 Years in Newlywed Carjacking

SAN MATEO, Calif. (AP) - A man accused of carjacking a newlywed couple with the bride in her wedding dress still in the vehicle was sentenced to three years in prison after pleading no contest to charges Tuesday.

Alan Ticas-Soto, 22, initially pleaded not guilty on Nov. 29 to one count of carjacking and one count of being under the influence of a controlled substance, but changed it to a plea of no contest, according to the San Mateo County District Attorney's Office.

Authorities said Steve Almanza and Valerie Zahn stopped by a Taco Bell for a snack after their wedding Oct. 29, and Almanza ran inside while Zahn stayed in the car with the engine still running.

Ticas-Soto, who was unarmed, got into the driver's seat and drove off with Zahn still inside, authorities said. She jumped out, and Ticas-Soto continued driving into a Taco Bell sign in the parking lot.

Zahn was uninjured in the incident.

[TexasStooge]

Alleged purse snatcher gets foreign notes, not dollars

LINDENHURST, N.Y. (Court TV) - If Thomas Dwight wanted to spend the money he swiped on Feb. 7, he would have had to board a plane bound for another continent to do so.

The purse he stole from a woman in Lindenhurst, N.Y., contained euros.

According to police documents, after Dwight, 18, allegedly robbed his victim and discovered the foreign currency, he proceeded to find a bank in an attempt to exchange the money for American dollars.

However, the purse snatcher was unaware that the various police departments in Suffolk County had been given a description of his getaway vehicle, a tan-colored Toyota.

Dwight's foreign exchange quest ended in the parking lot of a Chase Bank — located next to the Amityville Police Station.

Police officer John Sullivan, who was returning to the station after a twenty-minute search for the suspect's car, immediately recognized the occupied Toyota. The officer called for backup, and Dwight and another man, Jose Gallardo, were arrested without incident. They were later positively identified by the victim, the report said.

Dwight was charged with third-degree robbery; Gallardo was charged with criminal possession of stolen property.

[TexasStooge]

Police nab burglary suspect who made himself at home

WASHINGTON COUNTY, Wis. (Court TV) - Police in Washington County, Wis., have found the home burglar who eats, snoops, and leaves.

When Michael Weymier allegedly broke into three homes in early February, he found ways to make himself comfortable before making off with the valuables. He ate leftovers from the fridge, prepared and ate fresh meals, took showers, wore his victims' clothes, watched television and checked e-mail. The only thing he didn't do was stay around to get caught.

According to Captain Dale Schimdt of the Washington County Sheriff's office, after the last break-in, Weymier stole his victims' car, a 2004 Buick LeSabre. Three days later, deputies received a tip and tracked the vehicle and Weymier to Juneau County, where he was visiting a friend. The 24-year-old man was able to elude authorities but abandoned the car.

However, the suspect returned to visit the same friend on Feb. 9, Capt. Schmidt said. Weymier reportedly accompanied the woman to the Sauk County Courthouse, where he waited in her car while she went indoors to run an errand. The woman instead told court officers that the suspect was in her car.

Schmidt said Weymier led the officers on a 15-minute foot chase before getting caught. He reportedly confessed to the burglaries and is currently in Sauk County Jail.

[TexasStooge]

Man comes to court hearing with drugs

EVERETT, Wash. (Court TV) - If you're appearing in court because of one alleged crime, why show up with evidence that will get you charged with committing another one?

That is exactly what a 35-year-old man from Everett, Wash., did.

According to the newspaper the Daily Herald, the unidentified man was due in the Snohomish County Courthouse on Feb. 10 on a charge of illegal possession of stolen property. Visitors to the courthouse are required to pass through a metal detector, but must empty metallic contents in their pockets into designated baskets.

When the man placed his items in a basket, a guard noticed a small bag that looked suspicious, the report said. The guard handed the bag to an Everett police officer, who determined that the substance inside was cocaine.

The man was charged with possession of illegal drugs and booked into the Snohomish County Jail.

[TexasStooge]

Marijuana Package Mailed Without Address

By The Associated Press

MILL VALLEY, Calif. - A man who allegedly mailed a half-pound of marijuana without an address label on the package was arrested after authorities returned it to its sender.

Steven Coburn, 48, of Mill Valley was arrested Tuesday on suspicion of drug possession for sale and investigators found another 1 1/2 pounds of marijuana worth $10,000 at his home behind Tamalpais High School, said Det. Matt Lethin of the Marin County Major Crimes Task Force.

The private Corte Madera shipping company where Coburn tried to mail the package on Feb. 16 followed company protocol by opening the package to see whether the label was accidentally sealed inside, Lethin said.

"Once they opened it up and saw what was inside, they immediately called law enforcement," Lethin said.

Investigators said they are not sure whether Coburn forgot to affix the address label or it fell off, but it had a return address on it that led to Coburn.

He was booked into Marin County Jail and posted bail. A court date was set for March 8.

[TexasStooge]

Student Cited After Honking at Police

By The Associated Press

CHATTANOOGA, Tenn. - A college student has been given a lesson from a judge after his day in court — don't correct the police.

Clay Palmer, a student at the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga, honked his car horn when he saw police stop their patrol car, turn on blue flashers to go through a red light and then turn the flashers off. He got a ticket for violating the city noise ordinance.

The charge was reduced to a warning Wednesday when he went before a judge who told him he acted wrongly.

"The horn blowing is not the real problem here, it's that you were trying to correct the police and they didn't need correcting," Judge Russell Bean said.

Palmer left traffic court saying he still believed officers were abusing their authority.

"I see this cop with his blue lights come screeching up beside me and I didn't know what was going on," Palmer said. "Before they got to the next light, I could see they turned their blue lights off."

Palmer said officer Matthew Puglise forced him onto the hood of his car and issued him a ticket for honking the horn when there was no reason.

Puglise said he was helping another officer track down a speeder when Palmer saw him pass through the red light.

Bean said Puglise was right and Palmer was wrong.

"I expect officers to follow the rules like everyone else," Bean said.