How Hot and Dry Is It?

[Dee Bee]

It's so hot and dry that ...

...the birds have to use potholders to pull the worms out of the ground.

...the trees are whistling for the dogs.

...the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

...hot water comes from both taps.

...you can make sun tea instantly.

...you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

...when the temperature drops below 95 F, you feel a little chilly.

...you discover that it takes only two fingers to steer your car.

...you learn that you can get sunburned through your car window.

...you sear your hand opening the car door.

...you break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:00 A.M.

...your biggest bicycle wreck fear is "What if I get knocked out, end up lying on the pavement, and cook to death?"

...you experience the liquid stage of asphalt.

...the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter.

...the cows are giving evaporated milk.

...farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

[vbhoutex]

UH, have you moved to Texas Dee Bee?