Men vs Women...

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mf_dolphin
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Men vs Women...

#1 Postby mf_dolphin » Thu Dec 09, 2004 4:50 pm

Gender-Specific Dictionary


Wants & needs (wontz and nedz) n.
female: The delicate balance of emotional, physical and psychological longing one seeks to have fulfilled in a relationship.
male: Food, sex and beer.

Thingy (thing-ee) n.
female: Any part under a car's hood.
male: The strapfastener on a woman's bra.

Lesbian (lez-bi-an) n.

female: A woman who makes love to other women.
male: A woman who has sex with other women so men can watch and get really turned on.

Glass ceiling (glas see-ling) n.

female: The invisible barrier that stops women from rising to the upper levels in business.
male: What would really be great at work since that hot babe took over the office one flight up.

Vulnerable (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.

female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
male: Playing ball without a cup.

Communication (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.

female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the guys.

Butt (but) n.

female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes "look bigger."
male: The organ of mooning (and farting).

Commitment (ko-mit-ment) n.

female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

Entertainment (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.

female: A good movie, concert, play or book.
male: Anything with one ball, two folds, or three stooges.

Flatulence (flach-u-lens) n.

female: An embarrassing byproduct of digestion.
male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.

Making love (may-king luv) n.

female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
male: What men have to call "boinking" to get women to boink.

Remote control (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.

female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2 1/2 minutes.

Taste (tayst) v.

female: Something you do frequently to whatever you're cooking, to make sure it's good.
male: Something you must do to anything you think has gone bad, prior to tossing it out.
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#2 Postby yoda » Thu Dec 09, 2004 4:59 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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#3 Postby sunny » Thu Dec 09, 2004 5:01 pm

LOL - this is funny!
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#4 Postby coriolis » Thu Dec 09, 2004 9:24 pm

Ahhhhh. Life is good.
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#5 Postby Lindaloo » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:23 pm

Marshall must want his tail kicked all the way to Timbucktoo. hehehehe. I guess he is due one. :lol:
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#6 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:25 pm

Ahhhh-haaaaaa! C'mon, Linda - we MUST have a
spare "Butt Kicker", somewhere around Storm2K? :lol:
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#7 Postby Lindaloo » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:26 pm

breeze wrote:Ahhhh-haaaaaa! C'mon, Linda - we MUST have a
spare "Butt Kicker", somewhere around Storm2K? :lol:



There are plenty of spares. lol.
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#8 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:31 pm

Break a couple 'o them out, then - let the
beatings begin!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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#9 Postby coriolis » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:37 pm

Better be fast with the butt kickers. See "flatulence" above.
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#10 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:42 pm

A-hem, Ed....being brought up with a bunch of
BOYS, flatulence don't even phase me! They even
made me a good nurse in my profession! :lol: :lol:
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#11 Postby Lindaloo » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:43 pm

coriolis wrote:Better be fast with the butt kickers. See "flatulence" above.


Excuse me while I shake in my boots. ROFL!!! :lol: :lol:
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#12 Postby Lindaloo » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:43 pm

breeze wrote:A-hem, Ed....being brought up with a bunch of
BOYS, flatulence don't even phase me! They even
made me a good nurse in my profession! :lol: :lol:


Go breeze, go breeze, go breeze!! :D
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#13 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:44 pm

Them boots are made for walkin', eh, Linda? :lol:
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#14 Postby weatherlover427 » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:45 pm

You know that flatulence makes a nice breeze right? :D
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#15 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:49 pm

Breezes can handle whatever comes along....
can you say...TOUGH??? :lol:
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#16 Postby weatherlover427 » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:52 pm

breeze wrote:Breezes can handle whatever comes along....
can you say...TOUGH??? :lol:


I have no comment, I don't want to dig a hole just yet... :wink:
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#17 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:59 pm

LOL, bring on those strong, north winds, young man! These
here womanfolk can handle your nastinest, as we are
STRONG!
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#18 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 11:08 pm

Of course, ya'll know that it's time for the
old woman to turn in, for the night, eh?
Ahhhh - I shall have to continue my debate, tomorrow!


(*Old poopy woman turns in, for the night...) :lol:
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#19 Postby weatherlover427 » Thu Dec 09, 2004 11:09 pm

breeze wrote:LOL, bring on those strong, north winds, young man! These
here womanfolk can handle your nastinest, as we are
STRONG!


Well given that I am pretty far south and west, it would be a southwest wind for most of you. ;)
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#20 Postby breeze » Thu Dec 09, 2004 11:16 pm

LOL, Josh! ZZZZZzzzzzzz.............
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