My Retirement

[angelwing]

"My Retirement"

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it. So they gave me the ax.

After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it.
Mainly because it was a so-so job.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting. I couldn't get the hang of it.

I tried working in a optical factory but made a spectacle of myself. And they saw through me. I couldn't focus.

Then I tried to be a chef, figured it would add a little spice to my life. But I just didn't have the thyme.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.

Then I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company. But the work was just too draining.

So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.

My last job was working at a coffee house, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.

SO, I RETIRED, AND I FOUND I AM JUST PERFECT FOR THE JOB.

[coriolis]

I tried out with the postal service but couldn't deliver.

I tried out teaching but couldn't make the grade.

Got a job at a tobacco shop but wasn't up to snuff.

Applied for a job as a russian king, but wasn't Godunov