Letter to Clinton...

[Lindaloo]

Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton:
>
>I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for
>Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending my
>"Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:
>
>1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica
>Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey and Juanita Broderick.
>Did I leave anyone out?
>
>2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really
>planned to wait until he was older to discuss it with him, but now he
>knows more about it than I did as a senior in college.
>
>3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place
>(especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to
>know is what the meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know that
>certain sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while the
>other one involved does NOT have sex.
>
>4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new
>generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag
>the Dog" could be plausible after all.
>
>5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look
>graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and
>John Kennedy look moral.
>
>6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the 5th
>Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying
>about Democratic campaign fund raising.
>
>7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonments
>from the White-water "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal
>convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton" scandals.
>
>8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our
>foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully
>disguised as necessary trips.
>
>9. Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of dollars--- I really didn't
>need it in the first place, and I can't think of a better use of my
>hard-earned dollars than jet fuel for all your globe-trotting. I
>understand you, the family and your cronies have logged in more time
>aboard Air Force One than any other administration.
>
>10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons of
>convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have them
>rejoin society. (Not to mention the scores you pardoned while Governor
>of Arkansas)
>
>11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I'm sure that
>Laura Bush didn't like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming
>gifts you've received from your "friends."
>
>12. Thanks to your staff in the West Wing of the White House for
>vandalizing and destroying government property on the way out. I also
>appreciate removing all of that excess weight, China, silverware,linen,
>towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass, flight manuals, etc.)
>from Air Force 1. The weight savings means burning less fuel and fewer
>tax dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!
>
>13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million dollar
>advance for her upcoming "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10 million
>advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!
>
>14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing Israel to
>let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus
>in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As
>part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to
>agree to release so-called "political prisoners". However, the Israelis
>would not release any with blood on their hands. The American President
>at the time, you, Bill Clinton, and your Secretary of State, Warren
>Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released. Thus Mohammed
>Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane into
>Tower One of the World Trade Centre. This was reported by many of the
>American TV networks at the time that the terrorists were first
>identified.
>It was censored in the US from all later reports.Why shouldn't Americans
>know the real truth? What a guy!!
>
>If you agree that the American public must be made aware of these facts,
>pass this on. God bless America and THANK YOU (once again) for spending
>my taxes so wisely and frugally.
>
>SINCERELY, A US Citizen

[GalvestonDuck]

LOL! Pretty funny.

One thing though -- #14 is a case of mistaken identity. http://www.snopes.com/rumors/atta.htm Mahmoud Atta (the alleged bus bomber) and Mohammed Atta (9/11 #@&%#!)) are not the same person.

*snicker* @ the "Wag The Dog" reference. Can't watch that movie or "Primary Colors" without thinking about Bill.

[JetMaxx]

I couldn't have said it better....even if I'd tried.

That letter reminds me of an incident that occurred in a local Kroger store during Bill Clinton's first term...

Some loudmouthed left-wing woman was in the checkout line behind me, and she was laying it on thick...talking loudly to no one in particular...what a "great guy" Clinton was, and "how much she loved him"...and was "so glad he beat that disgusting twig" (referring to George Bush Sr). I don't know if she was just an idiot, or knew this was ultra- conservative Douglas County and was trying to tick people off.

I stood there minding my own business....UNTIL the fool started arguing with the young woman in line behind her...and became very nasty (called the young woman several vulgar names in front of her two toddlers). At this point, I'd had enough of her mouth, and said loudly "Gimme a break lady....Bill Clinton is a friggin draft dodger...that's ALL I have to know about him...he's a friggin draft dodger"!

With that, the liberal battle-ax turned beet-red in the face and ran out of the store...whimpering and crying as she went. Both the young mother and the checkout clerk thanked me...and I even heard polite applause when the foulmouthed troublemaker left the building....leaving her grocery cart and groceries in the checkout line

I know I was bad....but it felt SO GOOD!!

[southerngale]

I'd sign that letter.

Except I'd take out #14 since it was just a rumor.


Thanks for sharing Lindaloo.

[streetsoldier]

Just after the 1992 election, I visited my local library and was offered a "biography" of the new President; I replied, "No, thanks...I don't read fiction."

Later that year, coppertop went in for his very first "real" haircut. He sat there, VERY still and quiet, then addressed the barber...

"You're a hair-cutter, aren't you?"..."Well, yes, I am."..."I FEEL YOUR PAIN." This was delivered by a four-year-old boy, totally "dead-pan", and had the whole shop laughing! "Thats my BOY!!!!"