1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the
dinner table in front of her kids.
2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down
depending on how much gas is in it.
3. You've been married three times and still have the
same in-laws.
4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls
on a different night.
5. You wonder how service stations keep their
restrooms so clean.
6. Someone in your family died right after saying,
"Hey, guys, watch this."
7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling
fan.
9. Your junior prom offered day care.
10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled
Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines."
11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house
exploded right off its wheels.
12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth
than your spouse.
13. You have to go outside to get something from the
fridge.
14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.
15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get
a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because
there's a law against it.
17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting
your wife drunk.
You're An EXTREME Redneck When....
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