Tech Support for Wife 1.0

[Pburgh]

>Dear Tech Support:
>
>Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed
>that the new program began unexpected child processing that takes up a
>lot of space and valuable resources.
>
>In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
>monitors all other system activity.
>
>Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and
>Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever
>selected. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while
>attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going
>back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Do
>I have a virus problem?
>
>Please help!
>
>Thanks,
>A Troubled User.
>
>
>REPLY:
>
>Dear Troubled User:
>This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people
>upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a fun
>Utilities and Entertainment program.
>
>Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
>EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to
>Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program
>files from the system once installed. You do not have a virus problem.
>
>You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to
>not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under
>"Warnings-Alimony/Child Support." I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0
>and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the
>background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.
>
>The best course of action is to enter the command C: \ APOLOGIZE.
>Because ultimately you will have to give the 'APOLOGIZE' command before
>the system will return to normal anyway. Wife 1.0 is really a great
>program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with
>several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.
>
>However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will
>cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens,
>the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase
>additional software. For this I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !
>
> WARNING!!!
>DO NOT, under any circumstances, install or even play the demo version
>of Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported
>by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
>
>Best of luck,
>Tech Support
>

[alicia-w]

that's great. i've seen it before but it's always funny.

[Pburgh]

One guy I know tried to reboot wife 1.0 and his system crashed!!!

[SouthFloridawx]

WARNING!!!
>DO NOT, under any circumstances, install or even play the demo version
>of Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported
>by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
>

[Brent]

> WARNING!!!
>DO NOT, under any circumstances, install or even play the demo version
>of Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported
>by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

[coriolis]

Hmm. I'm running wife 1.0, but she's running husband 2.0. Somehow her program seems a lot more powerful than mine. She has a lot more memory than me, so I would be committing suicide by trying that Secretary program. I'm learning the tweaks and tricks to make the best of it, but I'll stay away from the cheats. In a couple years the license for Son 1.0 will expire and shortly thereafter Son 2.0, 3.0 and 4.0 will also expire, and automatically upgrade to Empty Nest - Beta Version. Once that happens I'm going to get MidLife Crisis 4.0 with the sports car plug in. Life will be good.

[Pburgh]

Pay close attention to your hard drive when you get that MidLife Crisis 4.0. Many times with that sports car plug in you can loose a lot of memory too.

[MSRobi911]

Well I installed Empty Nest after Daughter 1.0 and Son 1.0 Licenses ran out but unfortunately I must have a virus because every time I uninstall them, they keep coming back. I can't get MidLife Crisis 4.0 with the Sports Car program to install and am having a very difficult time running out of Patience 9999999.99!

Mary

[greeng13]

Try NOFINANCSUPPORT 18+ and follow up with RENTDUE 30.0 (constantly updating program 1x per month)

[MSRobi911]

If I could get them to install RealJob 1.0 it would help me do all the other stuff, but unfortunately they still are working on College 3.0 and 1.0.......

Mary

[greeng13]

lol

How about COOKFORMEFORACHANGE Beta?

[coriolis]

I love it!


I didn't mention that I also have Stepdaughterthatdroppedoutofhighschoolandisnowasinglemomlivinginamobilehomeandcantkeepasteadyjobandasksformoneyallthetimeandmomcantsayno DOS version that is installed and doesn't even show up in the Add/remove programs.

OK, I'll settle for a new bicycle.

[beachbum_al]

I am going to have to send this to my husband at work so he can laugh and get in trouble because of wife 1.0

[SouthFloridawx]

I’ve had no need to upgrade to Wife 1.0 yet. I have been using the Girlfriend brand of applications since the first alpha RC that I got for free while at school. So far, the various Girlfriend distros have satisfied my needs just fine. Once I even tried to run two different distros of Girlfriend on a dual boot. This worked well at first but an error loop developed when I tried to exchange data between distros. This corrupted both Girlfriend installations requiring a complete reformat of the system before installing the next upgrade.

I have found that upgrades to the various Girlfriends have become available soon after finding any bugs. This is a distinct advantage over the continuous patching required keep any Wife version stable. I looked into upgrading old Girlfriend versions to Wife 1.0 in the past, but found that Wife 1.0 was not compatible with my B. Pad Alpha 0.04 or any other applications form the Hobbies range.

It should be noted that the UK version of Girlfriend has a common law bug that is yet to be patched. After 5 years constant use, it will automatically upgrade to Wife 1.0 without notice. This bug can be avoided by purging the system every few years and installing a different Girlfriend distro.

[Terrell]

It should be noted that the UK version of Girlfriend has a common law bug that is yet to be patched. After 5 years constant use, it will automatically upgrade to Wife 1.0 without notice. This bug can be avoided by purging the system every few years and installing a different Girlfriend distro.

Curious, does that bug in the UK version of Girlfriend apply to all UK versions of Girlfriend, or does it only apply to Girlfriend setups with the live-in add on pack?