Help! My boyfriend refuses to shave!

[cajungal]

When I first met my boyfriend, I was very attracted to him and he was clean-shaven. Now, he has totally his appearance go. He has not shaved at ALL in over a month. His beard is now pretty thick and not groomed. And he did not even trim his neckline or anything. I am not physically attracted to him at all anymore. I tried talking to him several times this week about it in a very nice way. And it seems he gets mad everytime someone mentions him shaving. His excuse was that he was not going to shave until hunting season is over to keep his face warm. Hello? We live in SE coastal Louisiana and it does not get cold very often. Then, his excuse was that he was not shaving until LSU football season is over. He has not shaved since Sept 15th. I always still fix myself up around him and I don't understand after just a little over 3 months of dating, he would just let him self go. He even dresses sloppy most of the time now. He used to always dress nice in the beginning. I bought him a nice shirt for his birthday, now if we go somewhere, that is all he wears. Just because I bought him that shirt and like it, I still would like to see him wear something different once in awhile. I am not even going to kiss him until he shaves. I don't like all the scruff rubbing against my face. Now, I am embarrased to even introduce him to family. My friends wedding is next Friday and if still refuses to shave, I am going to be very embarrased!

[george_r_1961]

Well maybe u can compromise a little. He can keep his beard short like mine and keep it edged and well defined. As far as the way he dresses you could possibly tell him how good he looks wearing nice clothes. Thats the most nonconfrontational way I can think of to make him think more about his appearance

Good luck!

[kevin]

Lumberjacks are the epitome of manliness.

[coriolis]

Once the fish is landed, there's no longer a need for bait.

In response, you should stop shaving too.

[rainstorm]

here is an idea. tell him you wont bathe till he shaves. see how he likes that

[MGC]

Ha, RS! Better yet, if you shave your legs quit for a while. Then, when the hairs get long enough rub your leg on his....he'll get the message......MGC

[Lindaloo]

I have been around a few that are mental like this. lol. I would tell him if he wants to let it grow to at least shape it up.

[JenBayles]

Nothing wrong with facial hair as long as it's groomed. I suspect the more you make an issue of it, the more he's going to dig in and refuse to do anything about his appearance. If you're only a few months into the relationship, you might begin to wonder what other things he's going to be unreasonable about and if he's worth putting up with the juvenile behavior. Your choice either way.

[Josephine96]

You could always do the dramatic approach and tell him to get lost.. It appears u are 1 of those that wants to have their man look presentable. Which is understandably so...

You can try to get him to shave.. but if u keep pleading and he doesn't give in.. You never know what else he may have regarding appearance issues or what not..

Just my 2 cents lol..

[Pburgh]

A lot of men up here get that scruffy look during hunting season. However, if he is being a slob all of the time and not just when he is playing "grizzly adams", and if you don't find any other redeeming qualities, I say dump his butt!!!!!!!!! Yep, why waste your time on someone who cares that little about your opinion. Ed, is so right.

Or, you might just distance yourself enough that he is forced to "bait that hook" again.

[rainstorm]

Ha, RS! Better yet, if you shave your legs quit for a while. Then, when the hairs get long enough rub your leg on his....he'll get the message......MGC

yep, fight fire with fire.

[LaPlaceFF]

I say give him an ultamatim(sp)!!

[TexasStooge]

here is an idea. tell him you wont bathe till he shaves. see how he likes that

Good one!!

[Pburgh]

EWWWWWW. YUCK

[O Town]

I agree with wanting to have a man look clean shavin, I hate when my hubby gets all scruffy. I won't get near him until he shaves it, and most of the times he will shave after I say something about it. Although I do find a goatee sexy for some reason, and beards on SOME men. My man does not carry a beard well at all. lol.
I like the idea of compromise, ask him to get it cleaned up if he wants to keep it. If he doesn't then you need to decide if what he has on the inside is more important than what he looks like on the outside.

[rainstorm]

EWWWWWW. YUCK

thats the point. does he like his scruffy appearance so much that he doesnt mind a "ripe" aroma, lol

[Miss Mary]

Maybe an early xmas present is in order - a men's electric shaver, with all the attachments?

Couldn't hurt......then again, I like beards on men.

[cajungal]

Problem might be solved. I can't believe I got this many responses. He told me he was going to shave finally! I told him he is way too good looking to be hiding behind facial hair. And I told him I am not kissing him until he shaves. So, lets see if he is telling me the truth or not if I see him with a clean shaven face. I know he would not like it if I stopped shaving my arm pits and my legs, and wore sweatpants and sweatshirts all the time. I don't care if been together for 3 months or 50 years. I think someone should keep pride in their appearance. Looks are definitly not everything to me, his heart is more important. But, I still have to have some physical attraction to stay interested.

[breeze]

LOL, good luck, cajungal! I was reading this and agreeing with not shaving
yourself and see how he likes it - tell him you're building up your winter
thermal "coat", as well! I like well-groomed beards, but, not the
scruffy kinds that you could braid!

~Annette~

[Tstormwatcher]

I was going to say that if he refuses to clean himself up for you then maybe he just doesn't really care about you. If he doesn't shave, then take some time off away from him and maybe then he will wake up and stop acting like a slob.