DUI-Southern Style

[angelwing]

DUI - SOUTHERN STYLE

Only a person in North Carolina could think
of this. From the county where drunk driving is
considered a sport, comes this true story.


Recently a routine police patrol parked
outside a bar in Kinston , North Carolina after
last call the officer noticed a man leaving
the bar so apparently intoxicated that he
could barely walk.


The man stumbled around the parking lot for
a few minutes, with the officer quietly
observing. After what seemed an eternity in
which he tried his keys on five different
vehicles, the man managed to find his car and
fall into it.

He sat there for a few minutes as a number
of other patrons left the bar and drove off.
Finally he started the car,
switched the wipers on and off--it was a
fine, dry summer night--, flicked the blinkers
on and off a couple of times, honked the horn
and then switched on the lights. He moved the
vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little
and then remained still for a few more minutes
as some more of the other patrons' vehicles
left.

At last, when his was the only car left in
the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly
down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently
all this time, now started up his patrol car,
put on the flashing lights, promptly
pulled the man over and administered a
breathalyzer test.

To his amazement, the breathalyzer
indicated no evidence that the man had consumed
any alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to
the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the truly proud Redneck.

"Tonight I'm the designated decoy."

[JonathanBelles]

HAHAHA. That doesnt sound too NC, sounds more florida.

[pojo]

That was perfect!

[lurkey]

Alabama Woman on Horseback Charged With DUI

Posted: Today at 4:12 p.m.

SYLVANIA, Ala. — A woman who went for a horseback ride through town at midnight and allegedly used the horse to ram a police car was charged with driving under the influence and drug offenses, police said Tuesday.

"Cars were passing by having to avoid it, and almost hitting the horse," said Police Chief Brad Gregg.

He said DUI charges can apply even when the vehicle has four legs instead of wheels.

Police in the northeast Alabama town received a call around midnight Saturday about someone riding a horse on a city street, Gregg said.

Officer John Seals found Melissa Byrum York, 40, of Henagar on horseback on a nearby road and attempted to stop her. Seals asked the woman repeatedly to get off the horse, but she kept trying to kick the animal to make it run, the chief said.

"She wouldn't stop. She kept riding the horse and going on," Gregg said.

After ramming the police car with the horse and riding away, the woman tried to jump off but caught her foot in a stirrup, Gregg said. The officer took the woman into custody and discovered that she had crystal methamphetamine, a small amount of marijuana, pills and a small pipe, the chief said.

York was charged with DUI for allegedly riding the horse under the influence of a controlled substance. She was also charged with drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia, resisting arrest, assault, attempting to elude police and cruelty to animals.

Gregg said the horse, which belonged to York, "wasn't in the best of health, but it's still alive."

York was released from the DeKalb County Jail on $4,000 bond and was being transferred to the jail in Jackson County, where authorities had a warrant for her arrest on unrelated charges, Gregg said.

Jackson County officials said Tuesday that York had yet to be booked, and there were no records indicating whether she had a lawyer.

[TexasStooge]

[angelwing]

For a minute I thought Lady Godiva came back

[Brent]

Alabama Woman on Horseback Charged With DUI

Posted: Today at 4:12 p.m.

SYLVANIA, Ala. — A woman who went for a horseback ride through town at midnight and allegedly used the horse to ram a police car was charged with driving under the influence and drug offenses, police said Tuesday.

"Cars were passing by having to avoid it, and almost hitting the horse," said Police Chief Brad Gregg.

He said DUI charges can apply even when the vehicle has four legs instead of wheels.

Police in the northeast Alabama town received a call around midnight Saturday about someone riding a horse on a city street, Gregg said.

Officer John Seals found Melissa Byrum York, 40, of Henagar on horseback on a nearby road and attempted to stop her. Seals asked the woman repeatedly to get off the horse, but she kept trying to kick the animal to make it run, the chief said.

"She wouldn't stop. She kept riding the horse and going on," Gregg said.

After ramming the police car with the horse and riding away, the woman tried to jump off but caught her foot in a stirrup, Gregg said. The officer took the woman into custody and discovered that she had crystal methamphetamine, a small amount of marijuana, pills and a small pipe, the chief said.

York was charged with DUI for allegedly riding the horse under the influence of a controlled substance. She was also charged with drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia, resisting arrest, assault, attempting to elude police and cruelty to animals.

Gregg said the horse, which belonged to York, "wasn't in the best of health, but it's still alive."

York was released from the DeKalb County Jail on $4,000 bond and was being transferred to the jail in Jackson County, where authorities had a warrant for her arrest on unrelated charges, Gregg said.

Jackson County officials said Tuesday that York had yet to be booked, and there were no records indicating whether she had a lawyer.

That sounds like something someone would do here...

[Janie2006]

HAHAHA. That doesnt sound too NC, sounds more florida.

I beg to differ, sir. Sounds like a Mississippi event to me!

[MSRobi911]

That is toooooo funny!!!! Thanks for the laugh!

Mary

[O Town]

Good one anglewing! I will be passing that one along.

[lurkey]

The Alabama woman needs to move to New Jersey:

New Jersey Judge: No Such Thing As Zamboni DWI

Posted: Apr. 3, 2007
Updated: Today at 8:17 a.m.

NEWARK, N.J. — It's not drunken driving in New Jersey if it involves a Zamboni.

A judge ruled the four-ton ice rink-grooming machines aren't motor vehicles because they aren't useable on highways and can't carry passengers.

Zamboni operator John Peragallo had been charged with drunken driving in 2005 after a fellow employee at the Mennen Sports Arena in Morristown told police the machine was speeding and nearly crashed into the boards.

Police said Peragallo's blood alcohol level was 0.12 percent. A level of 0.08 is considered legally drunk in New Jersey.

Peragallo appealed, and Superior Court Judge Joseph Falcone on Monday overturned his license revocation and penalties.

"It's a vindication for my client," Peragallo attorney James Porfido said after the hearing. "It's the right decision."

Morris County Assistant Prosecutor Joseph D'Onofrio said no decision had been made on whether to appeal.

Peragallo, 64, testified at his trial that he did drink beer and vodka, but not until after he had groomed the ice. However, he told police he had a shot of Sambuca with his breakfast coffee and two Valium-pills before work.