Witchdoctor killings condemned
NAIROBI (Reuters) - Tanzania's President Jakaya Kikwete has condemned witchdoctors who kill albinos and harvest their body parts in the hope it will bring prosperity.
He said 19 albinos had been murdered since March 2007, and another two were missing presumed dead in the east African country.
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As they sing, "Ooh, eee, oo-aah-aah. Ting-tang, badabada bing bang..."
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Hawk swoops, attacks girl at Fenway Park
BOSTON (AP) - Once again, an A-Rod got an unfriendly welcome from the home of Red Sox Nation.
This time, it was 13-year-old Alexa Rodriguez and not the Yankees All-Star third baseman Alex Rodriguez.
She was touring Fenway Park on a school trip Thursday and was attacked by a resident red-tailed hawk that drew blood from her scalp. Rodriguez wasn't seriously hurt.
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Why is it that the person that has a shortened nickname "A-Rod" gets singled out?
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Diamond thong shown to the throng
SINGAPORE (Reuters) - A diamond thong worth S$168,000 ($122,000) was the highlight of a lingerie fashion show in Singapore on Thursday.
The Triumph Luxurious Diamond Thong had 518 brilliant-cut diamonds, totaling 30 carats, studded into the front of a black lace thong in a floral pattern. The skimpy underwear that left little to the imagination also had 27 white gold tassels hanging off it.
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Diamonds are forever, underwear isn't.
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Fowl play prompts unusual court order
CENTRAL ISLIP, N.Y. (AP) - A court has issued what could be at least a local first: an order of protection for a duck.
A Suffolk County judge approved the measure Thursday, telling a man accused of shooting a family's pet duck to stay away from the bird and her owners.
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Gives crying "Fowl" a whole new meaning.
"Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Moderator: S2k Moderators
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TexasStooge
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
No happy returns as school bans birthday cake
WELLINGTON (Reuters) - Children in a New Zealand school have been banned from bringing cakes to share on their birthdays, due to new government healthy eating guidelines.
Pupils at Oteha Valley primary school north of Auckland have been told they are allowed to celebrate their birthdays, but the cake must stay at home, the New Zealand Herald newspaper reported.
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The government there is Fat-o-phobic. I know they wanna do what's right, but they've pushed it too far.
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Farmer cuts property in two to give to ex-wife
BELGRADE (Reuters) - A Serb farmer used a grinding machine to cut in half his farm tools and machines to comply with a court ruling that he must share all his property with his ex-wife, local media reported on Thursday.
Branko Zivkov, 76, told Belgrade daily Kurir he had been ready to give his wife Vukadinka her equal share of everything earned during their 45-year marriage, but was furious at being asked to give away half his farming equipment.
Instead, he bought a grinder and cut in two all his tools, including large items such as cattle scales, a harrow and a sowing machine.
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He's literally taking the Prenup agreement seriously, hasn't he?
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Driver climbs on roof of van, crashes
READING, Pa. (AP) - A Reading man whose minivan crashed after he climbed on its roof while driving about 55 miles per hour is in fair condition this weekend.
Police in West Reading say the 38-year-old man later stripped naked and led them on a chase along the highway.
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Another day, another "Jackass" wannabe.
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Border separates senior center couple
PROVO, Utah (AP) - A 96-year-old man who outlived two wives is separated from his third — by immigration problems.
Canadian Doreen Buttery, 73, was a temporary visitor when she met Leonard "Woody" Woodward at a senior center in Provo. They wed this year and honeymooned in Alberta — which gave Buttery the chance to sell her house and prepare to move to Provo permanently.
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Couldn't they at least build a house on the border?
WELLINGTON (Reuters) - Children in a New Zealand school have been banned from bringing cakes to share on their birthdays, due to new government healthy eating guidelines.
Pupils at Oteha Valley primary school north of Auckland have been told they are allowed to celebrate their birthdays, but the cake must stay at home, the New Zealand Herald newspaper reported.
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The government there is Fat-o-phobic. I know they wanna do what's right, but they've pushed it too far.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Farmer cuts property in two to give to ex-wife
BELGRADE (Reuters) - A Serb farmer used a grinding machine to cut in half his farm tools and machines to comply with a court ruling that he must share all his property with his ex-wife, local media reported on Thursday.
Branko Zivkov, 76, told Belgrade daily Kurir he had been ready to give his wife Vukadinka her equal share of everything earned during their 45-year marriage, but was furious at being asked to give away half his farming equipment.
Instead, he bought a grinder and cut in two all his tools, including large items such as cattle scales, a harrow and a sowing machine.
----------------------------------------------------------------
He's literally taking the Prenup agreement seriously, hasn't he?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Driver climbs on roof of van, crashes
READING, Pa. (AP) - A Reading man whose minivan crashed after he climbed on its roof while driving about 55 miles per hour is in fair condition this weekend.
Police in West Reading say the 38-year-old man later stripped naked and led them on a chase along the highway.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Another day, another "Jackass" wannabe.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Border separates senior center couple
PROVO, Utah (AP) - A 96-year-old man who outlived two wives is separated from his third — by immigration problems.
Canadian Doreen Buttery, 73, was a temporary visitor when she met Leonard "Woody" Woodward at a senior center in Provo. They wed this year and honeymooned in Alberta — which gave Buttery the chance to sell her house and prepare to move to Provo permanently.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Couldn't they at least build a house on the border?
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Hair salon scalps customers
BEIJING (Reuters) - A Chinese hair salon has been shut down and fined 500,000 yuan ($71,280) for holding two customers hostage and charging wildly excessive fees for haircuts, a newspaper reported on Monday.
College students Zhang Yi and Yuan Sha Sha went for a haircut at Baolou International Beauty Salon in Zhengzhou, in the central province of Henan, expecting to pay the 38 yuan ($5.42) advertised on the window.
But when the barbers were done, they produced a joint bill for 12,000 yuan ($1,700), enough to make anyone's hair curl, the Beijing News reported.
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Get it? "Curl!" Well, that's one Barber shop I won't be going to.
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Watch the birdy: Cameraman fired for fake pigeon
BEIJING (Reuters) - A Chinese photographer has apologized for his "bad behavior" forging an award-winning picture of pigeons, Xinhua news agency said on Monday.
Zhang Liang, a former photographer for the Harbin Daily newspaper, admitted that he added a pigeon to a photo, using Photoshop software, which showed pigeons receiving bird flu vaccine shots from medical workers.
The photo won the top prize in the first China International Press Photo Contest, held by the Photojournalist Society of China in 2005.
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Hey look!! A Clay Pigeon!! (BANG!)
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Postal workers attacked by wild turkeys
MADISON, Wis. (AP) - Rather than rain or snow, or even dogs, postal workers in a West Side neighborhood near Owen Conservation Park are being pestered by wild turkeys this spring. Mara Wilhite, manager of the Hilldale Station Post Office, said she expected to deal with all manner of issues when she went to work for the U.S. Post Office. But that was not one of them.
"Just when you thought you'd heard it all," she said.
About five to 10 of the birds have been pecking at the postal workers as they make their rounds, and some of the birds have attacked the letter carriers with the sharp spurs on their legs. One of the birds went through the open door of a mail truck and scratched the driver.
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What next? Lions? Tigers? Bears? OH MY!!
BEIJING (Reuters) - A Chinese hair salon has been shut down and fined 500,000 yuan ($71,280) for holding two customers hostage and charging wildly excessive fees for haircuts, a newspaper reported on Monday.
College students Zhang Yi and Yuan Sha Sha went for a haircut at Baolou International Beauty Salon in Zhengzhou, in the central province of Henan, expecting to pay the 38 yuan ($5.42) advertised on the window.
But when the barbers were done, they produced a joint bill for 12,000 yuan ($1,700), enough to make anyone's hair curl, the Beijing News reported.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Get it? "Curl!" Well, that's one Barber shop I won't be going to.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Watch the birdy: Cameraman fired for fake pigeon
BEIJING (Reuters) - A Chinese photographer has apologized for his "bad behavior" forging an award-winning picture of pigeons, Xinhua news agency said on Monday.
Zhang Liang, a former photographer for the Harbin Daily newspaper, admitted that he added a pigeon to a photo, using Photoshop software, which showed pigeons receiving bird flu vaccine shots from medical workers.
The photo won the top prize in the first China International Press Photo Contest, held by the Photojournalist Society of China in 2005.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Hey look!! A Clay Pigeon!! (BANG!)
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Postal workers attacked by wild turkeys
MADISON, Wis. (AP) - Rather than rain or snow, or even dogs, postal workers in a West Side neighborhood near Owen Conservation Park are being pestered by wild turkeys this spring. Mara Wilhite, manager of the Hilldale Station Post Office, said she expected to deal with all manner of issues when she went to work for the U.S. Post Office. But that was not one of them.
"Just when you thought you'd heard it all," she said.
About five to 10 of the birds have been pecking at the postal workers as they make their rounds, and some of the birds have attacked the letter carriers with the sharp spurs on their legs. One of the birds went through the open door of a mail truck and scratched the driver.
----------------------------------------------------------------
What next? Lions? Tigers? Bears? OH MY!!
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Naomi Campbell banned from British Airways?
LONDON (Reuters) - Supermodel Naomi Campbell has been banned from flying with British Airways after she was escorted off a flight last week and arrested on suspicion of assaulting a police officer, media reports said on Tuesday.
The 37-year-old, released on bail pending an investigation into the incident, said she hoped the row with the airline could be resolved "amicably."
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No surprise there.
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Sexism chafes as vote looms
By Stephen Brown
ROME (Reuters) - Silvio Berlusconi, who has been biting his tongue for most of the April 13-14 election campaign, said on Tuesday his opponents on the left had no taste in women.
"The left has no taste, not even when it comes to women," he said. "As for our (women candidates) being more beautiful, I say that because in parliament they have no competition."
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OK, going back to the Naomi Campbell story...
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Louisiana Senate nixes state cocktail
BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) - A proposal to honor the New Orleans cocktail known as the Sazerac has gone down the drain.
The Louisiana Senate on Tuesday rejected legislation that would have made the whiskey-based beverage the official state cocktail.
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Probably because that'll give more people an excuse to get drunk. Staying on the alcohol topic...
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Vodka-maker Absolut apologizes for ads
By MARK STEVENSON, Associated Press Writer
MEXICO CITY - The Absolut vodka company apologized Saturday for an ad campaign depicting the southwestern U.S. as part of Mexico amid angry calls for a boycott by U.S. consumers.
The campaign, which promotes ideal scenarios under the slogan "In an Absolut World," showed a 1830s-era map when Mexico included California, Texas and other southwestern states. Mexico still resents losing that territory in the 1848 Mexican-American War and the fight for Texas independence.
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Absolut Stupidity.
LONDON (Reuters) - Supermodel Naomi Campbell has been banned from flying with British Airways after she was escorted off a flight last week and arrested on suspicion of assaulting a police officer, media reports said on Tuesday.
The 37-year-old, released on bail pending an investigation into the incident, said she hoped the row with the airline could be resolved "amicably."
----------------------------------------------------------------
No surprise there.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Sexism chafes as vote looms
By Stephen Brown
ROME (Reuters) - Silvio Berlusconi, who has been biting his tongue for most of the April 13-14 election campaign, said on Tuesday his opponents on the left had no taste in women.
"The left has no taste, not even when it comes to women," he said. "As for our (women candidates) being more beautiful, I say that because in parliament they have no competition."
----------------------------------------------------------------
OK, going back to the Naomi Campbell story...
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Louisiana Senate nixes state cocktail
BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) - A proposal to honor the New Orleans cocktail known as the Sazerac has gone down the drain.
The Louisiana Senate on Tuesday rejected legislation that would have made the whiskey-based beverage the official state cocktail.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Probably because that'll give more people an excuse to get drunk. Staying on the alcohol topic...
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Vodka-maker Absolut apologizes for ads
By MARK STEVENSON, Associated Press Writer
MEXICO CITY - The Absolut vodka company apologized Saturday for an ad campaign depicting the southwestern U.S. as part of Mexico amid angry calls for a boycott by U.S. consumers.
The campaign, which promotes ideal scenarios under the slogan "In an Absolut World," showed a 1830s-era map when Mexico included California, Texas and other southwestern states. Mexico still resents losing that territory in the 1848 Mexican-American War and the fight for Texas independence.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Absolut Stupidity.
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Frog without lungs found in Indonesia
By MICHAEL CASEY, AP Environmental Writer
BANGKOK, Thailand - A frog has been found in a remote part of Indonesia that has no lungs and breathes through its skin, a discovery that researchers said Thursday could provide insight into what drives evolution in certain species.
The aquatic frog Barbourula kalimantanensis was found in a remote part of Indonesia's Kalimantan province on Borneo island during an expedition in August 2007, said David Bickford, an evolutionary biologist at the National University of Singapore. Bickford was part of the trip and co-authored a paper on the find that appeared in this week's edition of the peer-reviewed journal Current Biology.
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What a "Ribbit"ing story.
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Ghost hunt canceled at former asylum
IOWA CITY, Iowa (AP) - The Johnson County Board of Supervisors has changed its mind about allowing a paranormal team to look for ghosts at a one-time mental asylum.
Board members last month approved an investigation of the buildings, but decided to vote it down in response to negative feedback, said Board Chairman Rod Sullivan.
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I think the Spirit Asylum is released.
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Ice-cream stick ship sails for England
DEN OEVER, The Netherlands (Reuters) - A Viking ship made from ice-cream sticks set sail for England from the Netherlands on Tuesday.
The 15-metre (50-foot) long ship, named after the Norse god Thor, is made from 15 million recycled ice-cream sticks glued together by U.S.-born stuntman Robert McDonald, his son and more than 5,000 children.
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I wonder how many kids get brain freeze before it's all said & done.
By MICHAEL CASEY, AP Environmental Writer
BANGKOK, Thailand - A frog has been found in a remote part of Indonesia that has no lungs and breathes through its skin, a discovery that researchers said Thursday could provide insight into what drives evolution in certain species.
The aquatic frog Barbourula kalimantanensis was found in a remote part of Indonesia's Kalimantan province on Borneo island during an expedition in August 2007, said David Bickford, an evolutionary biologist at the National University of Singapore. Bickford was part of the trip and co-authored a paper on the find that appeared in this week's edition of the peer-reviewed journal Current Biology.
----------------------------------------------------------------
What a "Ribbit"ing story.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Ghost hunt canceled at former asylum
IOWA CITY, Iowa (AP) - The Johnson County Board of Supervisors has changed its mind about allowing a paranormal team to look for ghosts at a one-time mental asylum.
Board members last month approved an investigation of the buildings, but decided to vote it down in response to negative feedback, said Board Chairman Rod Sullivan.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I think the Spirit Asylum is released.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Ice-cream stick ship sails for England
DEN OEVER, The Netherlands (Reuters) - A Viking ship made from ice-cream sticks set sail for England from the Netherlands on Tuesday.
The 15-metre (50-foot) long ship, named after the Norse god Thor, is made from 15 million recycled ice-cream sticks glued together by U.S.-born stuntman Robert McDonald, his son and more than 5,000 children.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I wonder how many kids get brain freeze before it's all said & done.
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Beer-sipping clients have taxes done in a bar
By Marcy Nicholson
HOBOKEN, New Jersey (Reuters) - The sounds of the Rolling Stones pour from the speakers while beer glasses are filled and a jovial game of darts takes place 10 feet away.
It's just another night at the office for Carmine Sodora, certified public accountant.
Sodora founded Tavern Tax in 2005. For 10 weeks leading up to the April 15 deadline to submit U.S. income tax returns, he brings his tax-filing services to bars on weekday nights and weekend afternoons. He didn't know of anyone else offering such a service.
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That's a perfect solution before they drink their tax problems away.
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Car wash finds $500,000 diamond pendant
ST PETERSBURG, Russia (Reuters) - Car cleaners at a Russian firm got a surprise when they cleaned out a vacuum cleaner this week: a diamond pendant worth up to 300,000 euros ($475,400).
"I didn't know how much it was worth at first so I got a jeweler to come around and he said it was worth as much as 300,000 euros," Vladimir Shapiro, owner of the car cleaning firm in Russia's northern city of St Petersburg, told Reuters.
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One of the drivers must've taken the "This Diamond Ring" song by Gary Lewis & The Playboys too seriously.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Mexican wrestler puckers up to fight
MEXICO CITY (AP) - In a hot-pink Mohawk haircut and leotard to match, he pirouettes before taking down his muscle-bound enemies with a swift kick to the groin.
Maximo, Mexican professional wrestling's latest sensation, then delivers a crowning blow — a kiss on the lips of his macho opponent — to the delight of a roaring crowd.
----------------------------------------------------------------
We don't know how it all started, but maybe this trailer mght give us a hint.
__________________________________________________________________________________________.
Woman found living with rats and snakes
ROCHESTER, Wash. (AP) - Authorities say a woman has been found living with hundreds of rats and four malnourished snakes in a home outside Rochester.
Thurston County Animal Services Director Susanne Beauregard says an official from the Area Agency on Aging alerted authorities about a month ago, but the woman has been uncooperative. She says the woman calls the rats her friends.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Coming up next "Rats Outliving Snakes In A House".
By Marcy Nicholson
HOBOKEN, New Jersey (Reuters) - The sounds of the Rolling Stones pour from the speakers while beer glasses are filled and a jovial game of darts takes place 10 feet away.
It's just another night at the office for Carmine Sodora, certified public accountant.
Sodora founded Tavern Tax in 2005. For 10 weeks leading up to the April 15 deadline to submit U.S. income tax returns, he brings his tax-filing services to bars on weekday nights and weekend afternoons. He didn't know of anyone else offering such a service.
----------------------------------------------------------------
That's a perfect solution before they drink their tax problems away.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Car wash finds $500,000 diamond pendant
ST PETERSBURG, Russia (Reuters) - Car cleaners at a Russian firm got a surprise when they cleaned out a vacuum cleaner this week: a diamond pendant worth up to 300,000 euros ($475,400).
"I didn't know how much it was worth at first so I got a jeweler to come around and he said it was worth as much as 300,000 euros," Vladimir Shapiro, owner of the car cleaning firm in Russia's northern city of St Petersburg, told Reuters.
----------------------------------------------------------------
One of the drivers must've taken the "This Diamond Ring" song by Gary Lewis & The Playboys too seriously.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Mexican wrestler puckers up to fight
MEXICO CITY (AP) - In a hot-pink Mohawk haircut and leotard to match, he pirouettes before taking down his muscle-bound enemies with a swift kick to the groin.
Maximo, Mexican professional wrestling's latest sensation, then delivers a crowning blow — a kiss on the lips of his macho opponent — to the delight of a roaring crowd.
----------------------------------------------------------------
We don't know how it all started, but maybe this trailer mght give us a hint.
__________________________________________________________________________________________.
Woman found living with rats and snakes
ROCHESTER, Wash. (AP) - Authorities say a woman has been found living with hundreds of rats and four malnourished snakes in a home outside Rochester.
Thurston County Animal Services Director Susanne Beauregard says an official from the Area Agency on Aging alerted authorities about a month ago, but the woman has been uncooperative. She says the woman calls the rats her friends.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Coming up next "Rats Outliving Snakes In A House".
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Uruguay hosts biggest BBQ, grills 12 tons of beef
MONTEVIDEO (Reuters) - More than a thousand barbecue fanatics in Uruguay grilled up 12 metric tonnes (26,400 lbs) of beef on Sunday, setting a new Guinness world record while promoting the country's succulent top export.
Army personnel set up a grill nearly 1 mile long and firefighters lit six tonnes of charcoal to kick off the gargantuan cookout.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Just get a knife, fork, plate, and a bottle of A-1 and come to the biggest BBQ in the whole world.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
stuff star unveils campaign weapon-her bottom
By Phil Stewart
ROME (Reuters) - She had no desire to be just another smiling face in Italian politics. So when stuff star Milly D'Abbraccio designed her campaign posters, it was obvious she was going to show off her bottom.
Targeting her male fan base, the veteran of Italy's adult entertainment industry has plastered images of her derriere all around the Eternal City in a bid to win a seat in Rome's city hall.
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stuff starts should not be politicians...especially after a senator was caught with a hooker.
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Man jailed for fake Viagra sales
SHANGHAI (Reuters) - The general manager of a Shanghai chemical company was jailed for two years on Thursday for selling fake tablets of the male impotence drug Viagra on the Internet, the official Xinhua news agency reported.
Yu Bohuai made a profit of over 60,000 yuan ($8,585) in 2006 and 2007 by selling 14,030 fake tablets to clients abroad and in Shanghai. He was arrested last July.
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No one will be singing "Viva Viagra" anymore.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Ky. city debates allowing pet goat
FRANKFORT, Ky. (AP) - A central Kentucky planning board won't get Gale Warfield's goat, but the city commission might.
Officials in Frankfort are discussing whether goats are livestock or pets.
The issue came up in October when Warfield received a violation notice about the goat and duck she keeps as pets on her residential property. Warfield said the letter informed her that Szokie the goat had to go.
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What did the goat do to the planning board?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oy! Eating champ downs 35 dozen oysters
By MARY FOSTER, Associated Press Writer
NEW ORLEANS - Patrick "Deep Dish" Bertoletti looked down at the litter of empty oyster shells in front of him and savored the sweet taste of victory. For Crazy Legs Conti, the bitter taste of defeat could be washed away only by beer.
The Acme World Oyster Eating championship belt — leather, with a silver dish featuring an oyster on the half-shell — hung on Bertoletti's skinny hips. The 22-year-old Chicago resident took the title Saturday by slurping 35 dozen of the big bivalves in eight minutes.
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Congratulations, "Deep Dish", you're qualified for the Hamwinkies eating contest.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Legally blind golfer, 85, gets ace
GREEN VALLEY, Ariz. (AP) - An 85-year-old legally blind golfer from southern Arizona made a hole-in-one this week on a par-3 course. Robert Dunham accomplished the feat on the third hole at Tortuga in Green Valley.
Playing with a group of fellow blind veterans enrolled in a Veterans Affairs health care system program, Dunham's volunteer assistant lined him up with the ball, handed him a 9-iron and stepped back.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I like to see golfers do this blind-folded.
MONTEVIDEO (Reuters) - More than a thousand barbecue fanatics in Uruguay grilled up 12 metric tonnes (26,400 lbs) of beef on Sunday, setting a new Guinness world record while promoting the country's succulent top export.
Army personnel set up a grill nearly 1 mile long and firefighters lit six tonnes of charcoal to kick off the gargantuan cookout.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Just get a knife, fork, plate, and a bottle of A-1 and come to the biggest BBQ in the whole world.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
stuff star unveils campaign weapon-her bottom
By Phil Stewart
ROME (Reuters) - She had no desire to be just another smiling face in Italian politics. So when stuff star Milly D'Abbraccio designed her campaign posters, it was obvious she was going to show off her bottom.
Targeting her male fan base, the veteran of Italy's adult entertainment industry has plastered images of her derriere all around the Eternal City in a bid to win a seat in Rome's city hall.
----------------------------------------------------------------
stuff starts should not be politicians...especially after a senator was caught with a hooker.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man jailed for fake Viagra sales
SHANGHAI (Reuters) - The general manager of a Shanghai chemical company was jailed for two years on Thursday for selling fake tablets of the male impotence drug Viagra on the Internet, the official Xinhua news agency reported.
Yu Bohuai made a profit of over 60,000 yuan ($8,585) in 2006 and 2007 by selling 14,030 fake tablets to clients abroad and in Shanghai. He was arrested last July.
----------------------------------------------------------------
No one will be singing "Viva Viagra" anymore.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Ky. city debates allowing pet goat
FRANKFORT, Ky. (AP) - A central Kentucky planning board won't get Gale Warfield's goat, but the city commission might.
Officials in Frankfort are discussing whether goats are livestock or pets.
The issue came up in October when Warfield received a violation notice about the goat and duck she keeps as pets on her residential property. Warfield said the letter informed her that Szokie the goat had to go.
----------------------------------------------------------------
What did the goat do to the planning board?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oy! Eating champ downs 35 dozen oysters
By MARY FOSTER, Associated Press Writer
NEW ORLEANS - Patrick "Deep Dish" Bertoletti looked down at the litter of empty oyster shells in front of him and savored the sweet taste of victory. For Crazy Legs Conti, the bitter taste of defeat could be washed away only by beer.
The Acme World Oyster Eating championship belt — leather, with a silver dish featuring an oyster on the half-shell — hung on Bertoletti's skinny hips. The 22-year-old Chicago resident took the title Saturday by slurping 35 dozen of the big bivalves in eight minutes.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Congratulations, "Deep Dish", you're qualified for the Hamwinkies eating contest.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Legally blind golfer, 85, gets ace
GREEN VALLEY, Ariz. (AP) - An 85-year-old legally blind golfer from southern Arizona made a hole-in-one this week on a par-3 course. Robert Dunham accomplished the feat on the third hole at Tortuga in Green Valley.
Playing with a group of fellow blind veterans enrolled in a Veterans Affairs health care system program, Dunham's volunteer assistant lined him up with the ball, handed him a 9-iron and stepped back.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I like to see golfers do this blind-folded.
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TexasStooge
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Stolen rhino horns could be deadly
CAPE TOWN (Reuters) - Two 19th century rhino horns stolen from a South African museum could be deadly if sold as a popular aphrodisiac because they are drenched in poison, a museum official said on Monday.
The "priceless" horns were snatched from a display at the historic mammal gallery in Cape Town on Saturday evening, said Jatti Bredekamp, chief executive of Iziko Museums.
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Never steal any horns from animals. They could be used as a potential deadly weapon on anybody.
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Man loses 17th-century violin on train
By RAPHAEL G. SATTER, Associated Press Writer
LONDON - A retired shipping consultant said he lost a 17th-century violin worth nearly $400,000 after leaving it on a train.
Rob Napier said Monday he did not realize the instrument — made by master Venetian craftsman Matteo Goffriller in 1698 — was still on the train's luggage rack until it began pulling out of the station.
"I think you can imagine the awful, kind of pit-in-your-stomach feeling," Napier told The Associated Press in a telephone interview. "My first instinct was: Can I jump on top of the train? But that was obviously stupid."
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Drivers and conductors tell us time and time again to make sure we take our belongings. But do some of us listen? No.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Smile and dress modestly, civil servants told
BELGRADE (Reuters) - Serbia's civil servants must get over their grumpiness, answer queries with a smile and stop wearing shorts to work, according to a new code of conduct that came into force this month.
The code says civil servants "must act professionally and kindly," "provide true and timely information" and "respect citizens' personality and dignity." They must keep citizens' business confidential and behave with dignity in public.
----------------------------------------------------------------
It's probably another one of thos e"Do this or else..." kind of cases.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Boy inflates 213 ballons — by his nose
BLAINE, Wash. (AP) - A 13-year-old boy hopes to win a balloon-blowing record by a nose.
Blowing through one nostril at a time, Andrew Dahl inflated 213 balloons within an hour Friday — a feat that has been submitted for review by Guinness World Records.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I don't think anybody's gonna be touching his balloons.
CAPE TOWN (Reuters) - Two 19th century rhino horns stolen from a South African museum could be deadly if sold as a popular aphrodisiac because they are drenched in poison, a museum official said on Monday.
The "priceless" horns were snatched from a display at the historic mammal gallery in Cape Town on Saturday evening, said Jatti Bredekamp, chief executive of Iziko Museums.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Never steal any horns from animals. They could be used as a potential deadly weapon on anybody.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man loses 17th-century violin on train
By RAPHAEL G. SATTER, Associated Press Writer
LONDON - A retired shipping consultant said he lost a 17th-century violin worth nearly $400,000 after leaving it on a train.
Rob Napier said Monday he did not realize the instrument — made by master Venetian craftsman Matteo Goffriller in 1698 — was still on the train's luggage rack until it began pulling out of the station.
"I think you can imagine the awful, kind of pit-in-your-stomach feeling," Napier told The Associated Press in a telephone interview. "My first instinct was: Can I jump on top of the train? But that was obviously stupid."
----------------------------------------------------------------
Drivers and conductors tell us time and time again to make sure we take our belongings. But do some of us listen? No.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Smile and dress modestly, civil servants told
BELGRADE (Reuters) - Serbia's civil servants must get over their grumpiness, answer queries with a smile and stop wearing shorts to work, according to a new code of conduct that came into force this month.
The code says civil servants "must act professionally and kindly," "provide true and timely information" and "respect citizens' personality and dignity." They must keep citizens' business confidential and behave with dignity in public.
----------------------------------------------------------------
It's probably another one of thos e"Do this or else..." kind of cases.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Boy inflates 213 ballons — by his nose
BLAINE, Wash. (AP) - A 13-year-old boy hopes to win a balloon-blowing record by a nose.
Blowing through one nostril at a time, Andrew Dahl inflated 213 balloons within an hour Friday — a feat that has been submitted for review by Guinness World Records.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I don't think anybody's gonna be touching his balloons.
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
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- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Court terminates 8-year-old girl's marriage
SANAA (Reuters) - A Yemeni court ordered the marriage of an eight-year-old girl terminated on Tuesday because she had not reached puberty.
The court also ordered the child's family to pay about $250 in compensation to the 30-year-old ex-husband.
The girl's lawyer and human rights activist Shatha Nasser said the minor had filed a suit in April asking for divorce and told the court that her husband had been physically abusing her and forcing her to have sex with him after hitting her."
----------------------------------------------------------------
I wonder if itr was a shotgun wedding.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oregon man thinks his black Labrador is an impostor
LAKE OSWEGO, Ore. (AP) - Ken Griggs likes his new dog, but he preferred the old one. Then again, it might be the same dog. In a possible case of mistaken identity, Griggs said the black Labrador named Callie that he left at a Dundee kennel before spring break was not the same dog he picked up a week later.
"It's a sweet dog," Griggs said of the impostor living at his Lake Oswego house. "It's tough because now we've had the dog for 10-plus days, and the kids, especially the younger ones, start to get attached to the dog. I like it, but I want mine."
----------------------------------------------------------------
How can the people at the kennel be so stupid?
SANAA (Reuters) - A Yemeni court ordered the marriage of an eight-year-old girl terminated on Tuesday because she had not reached puberty.
The court also ordered the child's family to pay about $250 in compensation to the 30-year-old ex-husband.
The girl's lawyer and human rights activist Shatha Nasser said the minor had filed a suit in April asking for divorce and told the court that her husband had been physically abusing her and forcing her to have sex with him after hitting her."
----------------------------------------------------------------
I wonder if itr was a shotgun wedding.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oregon man thinks his black Labrador is an impostor
LAKE OSWEGO, Ore. (AP) - Ken Griggs likes his new dog, but he preferred the old one. Then again, it might be the same dog. In a possible case of mistaken identity, Griggs said the black Labrador named Callie that he left at a Dundee kennel before spring break was not the same dog he picked up a week later.
"It's a sweet dog," Griggs said of the impostor living at his Lake Oswego house. "It's tough because now we've had the dog for 10-plus days, and the kids, especially the younger ones, start to get attached to the dog. I like it, but I want mine."
----------------------------------------------------------------
How can the people at the kennel be so stupid?
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
No buyer for 72 carat diamond
HONG KONG (Reuters) - Global auction house Sotheby's failed to hammer off a 72.22-carat, "D" flawless white diamond at its Asian sales last week in a possible sign of weakness in the global diamond trade.
The large diamond which had a pre-sale estimate of $10-12 million, attracted a final bid of HK$73 million ($9.24million) that fell short of the reserve price and went unsold, said Sotheby's press officer Rhonda Yung.
----------------------------------------------------------------
You would think there will be some millionaires there.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Iowa pranksters get just desserts: 3,000 forks in their yard
DUBUQUE, Iowa (AP) - When known pranksters Rick and Marilyn Jones left town for a wedding, neighbors seeking payback eyed their property and decided to stick a fork in it — a few thousand forks, in fact.
Tom and Paula Tschudi planted 3,000 white plastic forks in the Jones' yard and dangled more from the roof, fence and garage.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Rick and Marilyn got what they deserve.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Robbers steal watches worth $1.4 million
LONDON (Reuters) - Armed robbers stole designer watches worth 700,000 pounds in simultaneous daytime raids on two upmarket department stores in Manchester on Wednesday, police said.
Two men carrying claw hammers smashed display cases at Selfridges, while a third filled a bag with watches worth 400,000 pounds.
----------------------------------------------------------------
They're probably gonna sell them to the black market.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Company receives hundred of 'smelly' gas calls
ERIE, Pa. (AP) - National Fuel Gas Distribution Corp. crews have been busy with a smelly problem in about 850 Erie-area homes. The gas company says too much mercaptan was added to natural gas, prompting hundreds of calls from residents concerned about gas leaks.
Mercaptan is a substance added so people can "smell" natural gas, which is actually odorless and colorless in its natural state.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Who cut the cheese?
HONG KONG (Reuters) - Global auction house Sotheby's failed to hammer off a 72.22-carat, "D" flawless white diamond at its Asian sales last week in a possible sign of weakness in the global diamond trade.
The large diamond which had a pre-sale estimate of $10-12 million, attracted a final bid of HK$73 million ($9.24million) that fell short of the reserve price and went unsold, said Sotheby's press officer Rhonda Yung.
----------------------------------------------------------------
You would think there will be some millionaires there.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Iowa pranksters get just desserts: 3,000 forks in their yard
DUBUQUE, Iowa (AP) - When known pranksters Rick and Marilyn Jones left town for a wedding, neighbors seeking payback eyed their property and decided to stick a fork in it — a few thousand forks, in fact.
Tom and Paula Tschudi planted 3,000 white plastic forks in the Jones' yard and dangled more from the roof, fence and garage.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Rick and Marilyn got what they deserve.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Robbers steal watches worth $1.4 million
LONDON (Reuters) - Armed robbers stole designer watches worth 700,000 pounds in simultaneous daytime raids on two upmarket department stores in Manchester on Wednesday, police said.
Two men carrying claw hammers smashed display cases at Selfridges, while a third filled a bag with watches worth 400,000 pounds.
----------------------------------------------------------------
They're probably gonna sell them to the black market.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Company receives hundred of 'smelly' gas calls
ERIE, Pa. (AP) - National Fuel Gas Distribution Corp. crews have been busy with a smelly problem in about 850 Erie-area homes. The gas company says too much mercaptan was added to natural gas, prompting hundreds of calls from residents concerned about gas leaks.
Mercaptan is a substance added so people can "smell" natural gas, which is actually odorless and colorless in its natural state.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Who cut the cheese?
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
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- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Cute and prickly hedgehogs latest pet fad
By Jane Lee
LONDON (Reuters) - Can man's best friend be replaced by a prickly pal the size of your palm?
Busy British pet lovers have been buying hedgehogs, whose nocturnal habits make them appealing to the modern worker because they wake in the evening when their owners arrive home after a day in the office.
Although Britain has its own wild breed of hedgehogs, the latest pet craze focuses on African pygmy hedgehogs -- a cross between Algerian and white-bellied hedgehogs.
----------------------------------------------------------------
As long as they're not used as weapons.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Jogging pilgrim stuns motorists Thu
BERLIN (Reuters) - Police in Germany were shocked to find a man running down a major highway pulling a three-wheeled trailer -- but even more surprised to learn he was a Polish pilgrim on a 3,000 km (1,800 mile) trek.
Motorists near Coburg in Bavaria saw the man towing a load with a rod attached to his back and called police.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Nobody has ever seen a Jogging Pilgrim before, huh?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Get the right name and open doors for your child
LONDON (Reuters) - British parents spend 30 million hours a year picking the names of their newborn children, a survey showed on Thursday.
And choosing the right name can be crucial -- if you want your child to get on in life.
The survey by Abbey Banking showed that parents agonize for up to 45 hours over the name of their child -- a combined 30 million hours annually in Britain.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Luckily, I already picked one for my future baby(ies). Speaking of which...
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Maryland woman gives birth to rare quadruplets, 3 identical
TOWSON, Md. (AP) - A mother has given birth to a rare set of quadruplets in which three of the four boys are identical. The boys were born 11 weeks premature in January at Greater Baltimore Medical Center in Towson. The parents plan to introduce themselves and their boys at a news conference Friday.
There are fewer than 100 documented cases of "identical triplets plus one" in the United States, hospital officials said.
----------------------------------------------------------------
3 years from now, we'll see the triplets being misidentified by their names.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
New Jersey mayor finds lost cat in home's wall
NORTH ARLINGTON, N.J. (AP) - Mayor Peter Massa put out a citywide cat call when his Maine Coon disappeared. Massa had an automatic call sent to 8,500 voters on Wednesday asking for help finding Max.
Turns out he didn't have to look that far. Massa's wife, Val, says 14-year-old Max was found inside a wall of their house Thursday morning. He had been missing since Tuesday
----------------------------------------------------------------
Needless to say, Curiosity walled the cat.
Speaking of pets, here's a follow-up on the mistaken pooch story:
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man who claimed dog was imposter reunited with right pooch
LAKE OSWEGO, Ore. (AP) - Ken Griggs finally brought the right dog home. More than two weeks after the Lake Oswego man claimed a boarding kennel returned the wrong dog after spring break, he and his family were reunited with their black Labrador named Callie.
During the break in late March, Callie shared a kennel with a lookalike named Dixie. When Griggs went to retrieve Callie on March 30, he somehow ended up with Dixie.
Griggs knew something wasn't right when Callie wouldn't heel and the family cat — normally pals with Callie — hissed at the dog.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And now we solved the mystery:
ROBOT: You can't have Callie, I love her!
CLERK: Callie has to go.
ROBOT: No! No! Weeping. Weeping.
By Jane Lee
LONDON (Reuters) - Can man's best friend be replaced by a prickly pal the size of your palm?
Busy British pet lovers have been buying hedgehogs, whose nocturnal habits make them appealing to the modern worker because they wake in the evening when their owners arrive home after a day in the office.
Although Britain has its own wild breed of hedgehogs, the latest pet craze focuses on African pygmy hedgehogs -- a cross between Algerian and white-bellied hedgehogs.
----------------------------------------------------------------
As long as they're not used as weapons.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Jogging pilgrim stuns motorists Thu
BERLIN (Reuters) - Police in Germany were shocked to find a man running down a major highway pulling a three-wheeled trailer -- but even more surprised to learn he was a Polish pilgrim on a 3,000 km (1,800 mile) trek.
Motorists near Coburg in Bavaria saw the man towing a load with a rod attached to his back and called police.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Nobody has ever seen a Jogging Pilgrim before, huh?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Get the right name and open doors for your child
LONDON (Reuters) - British parents spend 30 million hours a year picking the names of their newborn children, a survey showed on Thursday.
And choosing the right name can be crucial -- if you want your child to get on in life.
The survey by Abbey Banking showed that parents agonize for up to 45 hours over the name of their child -- a combined 30 million hours annually in Britain.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Luckily, I already picked one for my future baby(ies). Speaking of which...
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Maryland woman gives birth to rare quadruplets, 3 identical
TOWSON, Md. (AP) - A mother has given birth to a rare set of quadruplets in which three of the four boys are identical. The boys were born 11 weeks premature in January at Greater Baltimore Medical Center in Towson. The parents plan to introduce themselves and their boys at a news conference Friday.
There are fewer than 100 documented cases of "identical triplets plus one" in the United States, hospital officials said.
----------------------------------------------------------------
3 years from now, we'll see the triplets being misidentified by their names.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
New Jersey mayor finds lost cat in home's wall
NORTH ARLINGTON, N.J. (AP) - Mayor Peter Massa put out a citywide cat call when his Maine Coon disappeared. Massa had an automatic call sent to 8,500 voters on Wednesday asking for help finding Max.
Turns out he didn't have to look that far. Massa's wife, Val, says 14-year-old Max was found inside a wall of their house Thursday morning. He had been missing since Tuesday
----------------------------------------------------------------
Needless to say, Curiosity walled the cat.
Speaking of pets, here's a follow-up on the mistaken pooch story:
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man who claimed dog was imposter reunited with right pooch
LAKE OSWEGO, Ore. (AP) - Ken Griggs finally brought the right dog home. More than two weeks after the Lake Oswego man claimed a boarding kennel returned the wrong dog after spring break, he and his family were reunited with their black Labrador named Callie.
During the break in late March, Callie shared a kennel with a lookalike named Dixie. When Griggs went to retrieve Callie on March 30, he somehow ended up with Dixie.
Griggs knew something wasn't right when Callie wouldn't heel and the family cat — normally pals with Callie — hissed at the dog.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And now we solved the mystery:
ROBOT: You can't have Callie, I love her!
CLERK: Callie has to go.
ROBOT: No! No! Weeping. Weeping.
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Psychics see big trouble over new laws
By Peter Griffiths
LONDON (Reuters) - Fortune-tellers, mediums and spiritual healers marched on the home of the British prime minister at Downing Street on Friday to protest against new laws they fear will lead to them being "persecuted and prosecuted."
Organizers say that replacing the Fraudulent Mediums Act of 1951 with new consumer protection rules will remove key legal protection for "genuine" mediums.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Nobody believes in Psychics anymore, so why not?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oregon cop battles 12-foot python to save pet store owner
EUGENE, Ore. - A pet store owner is calling a police sergeant a hero for saving her from the coils of a 12-foot Burmese python doing its best to turn her into a meal.
Teresa Rossiter had reached into a cage Thursday to show the huge snake to a customer when it bit her right hand and coiled around her left arm to throw her to the floor.
----------------------------------------------------------------
OK, the snake is not for sale now.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Dog crosses desert, mountains and somehow gets back home
ELY, Nev. (AP) - A dog that ran off during a road-trip rest stop apparently made her way nearly 80 miles across Nevada's high desert and two mountain ranges to return home a week later.
Moon, a Siberian husky, was reunited April 14 with owner Doug Dashiell, who had last seen her April 6 near Railroad Valley, about 77 miles from his home in Ely.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Moon could be the next "Lassie".
By Peter Griffiths
LONDON (Reuters) - Fortune-tellers, mediums and spiritual healers marched on the home of the British prime minister at Downing Street on Friday to protest against new laws they fear will lead to them being "persecuted and prosecuted."
Organizers say that replacing the Fraudulent Mediums Act of 1951 with new consumer protection rules will remove key legal protection for "genuine" mediums.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Nobody believes in Psychics anymore, so why not?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oregon cop battles 12-foot python to save pet store owner
EUGENE, Ore. - A pet store owner is calling a police sergeant a hero for saving her from the coils of a 12-foot Burmese python doing its best to turn her into a meal.
Teresa Rossiter had reached into a cage Thursday to show the huge snake to a customer when it bit her right hand and coiled around her left arm to throw her to the floor.
----------------------------------------------------------------
OK, the snake is not for sale now.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Dog crosses desert, mountains and somehow gets back home
ELY, Nev. (AP) - A dog that ran off during a road-trip rest stop apparently made her way nearly 80 miles across Nevada's high desert and two mountain ranges to return home a week later.
Moon, a Siberian husky, was reunited April 14 with owner Doug Dashiell, who had last seen her April 6 near Railroad Valley, about 77 miles from his home in Ely.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Moon could be the next "Lassie".
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
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- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Prince William lands copter in girlfriend's garden
LONDON (Reuters) - Prince William landed a Royal Air Force helicopter in the garden of his girlfriend Kate Middleton's family home but the Defence Ministry defended his actions, saying he achieved essential training objectives.
The News of the World reported on Sunday that 25-year-old William, second in line to the British throne, asked Middleton's parents' permission to land at their home in Berkshire, southern England, because of a shortage of landing slots in the neighboring county Hampshire.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, c'mon! Can't he impress his girlfriend?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Hello Kitty gets high fashion makeover
TOKYO (Reuters) - She may be cute, but the latest top model to make her debut in Vogue is also podgy with short legs and whiskers.
Hello Kitty, a popular cat character in Japan, is set for a designer makeover in the June issue of Japanese Vogue, which goes on sale on April 26.
The fashion spread will show Kitty modeling the latest autumn and winter designs by John Galliano for the Dior brand, posing with the designer and enjoying a shopping spree in Paris.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Watch as Hello Kitty gets an Extreme Makeover.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Buddy wins 'beautiful bulldog' contest in Des Moines
By NAFEESA SYEED, Associated Press Writer
DES MOINES, Iowa - Buddy the bulldog is a sleeping beauty. The reddish brown male can usually be found sleeping on his back, his large tongue lolling out as he snores loudly. But the 3-year-old from Ankeny, Iowa, was wide-awake Monday while being crowned winner of the "Beautiful Bulldog" contest, held in downtown Des Moines. The contest was among events leading up to the Drake Relays, one of the nation's oldest and most prestigious track and field competitions.
The beauty contest honors Drake University's mascot, the bulldog.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Whatever happened to the "Chappy Chihuaua" contest?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Don't touch me there: NY jury rejects rectal exam lawsuit
NEW YORK - A hospital did nothing wrong when it tried to examine the rectum of a construction worker who had been hit on the head by a falling wooden beam, a jury found Monday.
After deliberating for about an hour, a state Supreme Court jury awarded nothing to Brian Persaud, who sued NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital for unspecified damages. The panel found the hospital and its emergency room medical staff were not liable.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Like it or not, it's required.
LONDON (Reuters) - Prince William landed a Royal Air Force helicopter in the garden of his girlfriend Kate Middleton's family home but the Defence Ministry defended his actions, saying he achieved essential training objectives.
The News of the World reported on Sunday that 25-year-old William, second in line to the British throne, asked Middleton's parents' permission to land at their home in Berkshire, southern England, because of a shortage of landing slots in the neighboring county Hampshire.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, c'mon! Can't he impress his girlfriend?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Hello Kitty gets high fashion makeover
TOKYO (Reuters) - She may be cute, but the latest top model to make her debut in Vogue is also podgy with short legs and whiskers.
Hello Kitty, a popular cat character in Japan, is set for a designer makeover in the June issue of Japanese Vogue, which goes on sale on April 26.
The fashion spread will show Kitty modeling the latest autumn and winter designs by John Galliano for the Dior brand, posing with the designer and enjoying a shopping spree in Paris.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Watch as Hello Kitty gets an Extreme Makeover.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Buddy wins 'beautiful bulldog' contest in Des Moines
By NAFEESA SYEED, Associated Press Writer
DES MOINES, Iowa - Buddy the bulldog is a sleeping beauty. The reddish brown male can usually be found sleeping on his back, his large tongue lolling out as he snores loudly. But the 3-year-old from Ankeny, Iowa, was wide-awake Monday while being crowned winner of the "Beautiful Bulldog" contest, held in downtown Des Moines. The contest was among events leading up to the Drake Relays, one of the nation's oldest and most prestigious track and field competitions.
The beauty contest honors Drake University's mascot, the bulldog.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Whatever happened to the "Chappy Chihuaua" contest?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Don't touch me there: NY jury rejects rectal exam lawsuit
NEW YORK - A hospital did nothing wrong when it tried to examine the rectum of a construction worker who had been hit on the head by a falling wooden beam, a jury found Monday.
After deliberating for about an hour, a state Supreme Court jury awarded nothing to Brian Persaud, who sued NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital for unspecified damages. The panel found the hospital and its emergency room medical staff were not liable.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Like it or not, it's required.
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
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- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Woman claims Victoria's Secret stole her bra
NEW YORK (Reuters) - A New York woman filed suit against Limited Brands Inc Monday alleging the parent company of Victoria's Secret stole her idea for its Very Sexy 100-way strapless convertible bra.
Katerina Plew sued in U.S. District Court in lower Manhattan, saying Victoria's Secret infringed her May 2004 patent and knew about the patent since at least April 2006.
----------------------------------------------------------------
A bra is a bra is a bra is a bra.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Dogs "rescue" girl abandoned by mother
PATNA, India (Reuters) - Hundreds of villagers have flocked to a remote Indian village to see a baby girl who was saved by stray dogs after she was abandoned in a mound of mud by her mother, officials said on Tuesday.
Villagers in the eastern state of Bihar saved the newborn on the weekend after they saw three dogs barking near a baby covered with mud.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Instead of humans rescuing pets, we have pets rescuing humans!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Elvis' secret visit revealed, 50 years on
By Andrew Hough
LONDON (Reuters) - Rock'n'Roll legend Elvis Presley did in fact visit Britain, it was revealed on Tuesday, with a secret visit to London accompanied by another rocker.
For more than half a century it was generally accepted the "King" only made a fleeting transit visit to Scotland in 1960 -- much to the disappointment of his legion of UK fans.
----------------------------------------------------------------
But some of the fans got a second chance. So is Elvis alive?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Spider plague closes Australian hospital
SYDNEY, Australia (AP) - A tiny Australian hospital is closing temporarily because of an infestation of poisonous spiders.
The Baralaba Multi Purpose Health Service will close for 24 hours starting Thursday morning so officials can fumigate the building to get rid of redback spiders that have been found in large numbers in the main part of the hospital.
----------------------------------------------------------------
In that case, all the hospitals worldwide need to keep their eyes peeled for any suspicious insect activity.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Robotic vigilante: Homemade 'Bum Bot' patrols in Atlanta
By GREG BLUESTEIN, Associated Press Writer
ATLANTA - Cars passing O'Terrill's pub screech to a halt at the sight of a 300-pound, waist-high robot marked "SECURITY" rolling through downtown long after dark.
The regulars hardly glance outside. They've seen bar owner Rufus Terrill's invention on patrol before — its bright red lights and even brighter spotlight blazing, infrared video camera filming and water cannon at the ready in the spinning turret on top.
----------------------------------------------------------------
If it's considered a pilot program, I think it should work in Dallas too.
NEW YORK (Reuters) - A New York woman filed suit against Limited Brands Inc Monday alleging the parent company of Victoria's Secret stole her idea for its Very Sexy 100-way strapless convertible bra.
Katerina Plew sued in U.S. District Court in lower Manhattan, saying Victoria's Secret infringed her May 2004 patent and knew about the patent since at least April 2006.
----------------------------------------------------------------
A bra is a bra is a bra is a bra.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Dogs "rescue" girl abandoned by mother
PATNA, India (Reuters) - Hundreds of villagers have flocked to a remote Indian village to see a baby girl who was saved by stray dogs after she was abandoned in a mound of mud by her mother, officials said on Tuesday.
Villagers in the eastern state of Bihar saved the newborn on the weekend after they saw three dogs barking near a baby covered with mud.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Instead of humans rescuing pets, we have pets rescuing humans!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Elvis' secret visit revealed, 50 years on
By Andrew Hough
LONDON (Reuters) - Rock'n'Roll legend Elvis Presley did in fact visit Britain, it was revealed on Tuesday, with a secret visit to London accompanied by another rocker.
For more than half a century it was generally accepted the "King" only made a fleeting transit visit to Scotland in 1960 -- much to the disappointment of his legion of UK fans.
----------------------------------------------------------------
But some of the fans got a second chance. So is Elvis alive?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Spider plague closes Australian hospital
SYDNEY, Australia (AP) - A tiny Australian hospital is closing temporarily because of an infestation of poisonous spiders.
The Baralaba Multi Purpose Health Service will close for 24 hours starting Thursday morning so officials can fumigate the building to get rid of redback spiders that have been found in large numbers in the main part of the hospital.
----------------------------------------------------------------
In that case, all the hospitals worldwide need to keep their eyes peeled for any suspicious insect activity.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Robotic vigilante: Homemade 'Bum Bot' patrols in Atlanta
By GREG BLUESTEIN, Associated Press Writer
ATLANTA - Cars passing O'Terrill's pub screech to a halt at the sight of a 300-pound, waist-high robot marked "SECURITY" rolling through downtown long after dark.
The regulars hardly glance outside. They've seen bar owner Rufus Terrill's invention on patrol before — its bright red lights and even brighter spotlight blazing, infrared video camera filming and water cannon at the ready in the spinning turret on top.
----------------------------------------------------------------
If it's considered a pilot program, I think it should work in Dallas too.
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
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Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
I don't know nothin' 'bout writin' musicals...
By Paul Majendie
LONDON (Reuters) - Critics decided they "didn't give a damn" on Wednesday after the world premier of a new musical version of the American Civil War epic "Gone With the Wind."
Headline writers had a field day adapting Rhett Butler's famous parting shot to Scarlett O'Hara -- and most reviewers agreed the show was far too long at over three and a half hours.
"Frankly my dear, it's not up to much" decided the Daily Mail's Quentin Letts after the first night of the musical directed by Trevor Nunn, famed for his stagings of "Cats" and "Les Miserables" that became worldwide hits.
----------------------------------------------------------------
"Frankly my dear, nothing beats the original movie".
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Penis theft panic hits city
By Joe Bavier
KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.
Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I wonder if that kind of Witchcraft is used on Male Cheaters.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Jell-O snack packs splatter over highway in Florida
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. (AP) - A driver is being treated at a Saint Johns County hospital after his truck overturned, spilling Jell-O snack packs all over I-95.
Police say the driver's truck flipped over this morning after it slammed into another truck. Individual packs of Jell-O splattered all over the highway, which caused a major traffic jam.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And even more bad news, the price of Jell-O has gone up, and there's a sticky mess on the freeway.
By Paul Majendie
LONDON (Reuters) - Critics decided they "didn't give a damn" on Wednesday after the world premier of a new musical version of the American Civil War epic "Gone With the Wind."
Headline writers had a field day adapting Rhett Butler's famous parting shot to Scarlett O'Hara -- and most reviewers agreed the show was far too long at over three and a half hours.
"Frankly my dear, it's not up to much" decided the Daily Mail's Quentin Letts after the first night of the musical directed by Trevor Nunn, famed for his stagings of "Cats" and "Les Miserables" that became worldwide hits.
----------------------------------------------------------------
"Frankly my dear, nothing beats the original movie".
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Penis theft panic hits city
By Joe Bavier
KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.
Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I wonder if that kind of Witchcraft is used on Male Cheaters.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Jell-O snack packs splatter over highway in Florida
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. (AP) - A driver is being treated at a Saint Johns County hospital after his truck overturned, spilling Jell-O snack packs all over I-95.
Police say the driver's truck flipped over this morning after it slammed into another truck. Individual packs of Jell-O splattered all over the highway, which caused a major traffic jam.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And even more bad news, the price of Jell-O has gone up, and there's a sticky mess on the freeway.
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Thousands flock to exhumed body of saint
By Philip Pullella
SAN GIOVANNI ROTONDO, Italy (Reuters) - The exhumed body of Padre Pio, a saint considered a miracle worker by his devotees, attracted thousands of pilgrims on Thursday when it went on display 40 years after his death.
Padre Pio is one of the Catholic Church's most popular saints and during his lifetime the Italian monk was said to have had the stigmata, the bleeding wounds of Jesus' crucifixion on his hands and feet.
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His body must've been well prerserved.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Nose-picking lawmaker to shout his last good-bye
TAIPEI (Reuters) - Taiwan's cabinet will soon lose one of its more colorful members who was notorious for sleeping in parliament, shouting at legislators, picking his nose in public and shoving a journalist.
Tu Cheng-sheng, education minister since 2004, will step down next month along with current President Chen Shui-bian.
"According to Eastern tradition and Taiwan culture, you could say that these actions were hard to accept," said Liu Chin-hsu, secretary-general of the National Teachers' Association.
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Who would want him as a lawyer anyways?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Getting paid to drink
LONDON (Reuters) - Found: drinking companions to join elderly gentleman for a friendly beer at his local pub.
Mike Hammond was bombarded with offers after advertising in his village post office for someone to accompany his 88-year-old father Jack on visits to a southern England pub from a nursing home.
He offered the lucky winner 7 pounds ($14) an hour plus expenses and, after sifting through the applicants, decided on a job-share. Drinking duties are to be divided between a retired doctor and a former military man.
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That's probvably the Nose-pickin' Lawyer's next move.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man mowing his lawn discovers 7-10 foot
CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa - A Cedar Rapids man mowing his lawn has stumbled into a big hole — but the origin is a mystery. Rick Thompson discovered the hole on Wednesday. He says the grass seemed a little soft in that spot, and he blamed it on the rain. Then his leg sank up to his calf. He grabbed the lawn mower to stop himself from sinking any more.
Thompson started digging around the hole, which turned out to be 7-10 feet deep, with water and rusty pipes in the bottom.
----------------------------------------------------------------
(as Milli Vanilli lipsynching) "Blame It On The Rain".
By Philip Pullella
SAN GIOVANNI ROTONDO, Italy (Reuters) - The exhumed body of Padre Pio, a saint considered a miracle worker by his devotees, attracted thousands of pilgrims on Thursday when it went on display 40 years after his death.
Padre Pio is one of the Catholic Church's most popular saints and during his lifetime the Italian monk was said to have had the stigmata, the bleeding wounds of Jesus' crucifixion on his hands and feet.
----------------------------------------------------------------
His body must've been well prerserved.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Nose-picking lawmaker to shout his last good-bye
TAIPEI (Reuters) - Taiwan's cabinet will soon lose one of its more colorful members who was notorious for sleeping in parliament, shouting at legislators, picking his nose in public and shoving a journalist.
Tu Cheng-sheng, education minister since 2004, will step down next month along with current President Chen Shui-bian.
"According to Eastern tradition and Taiwan culture, you could say that these actions were hard to accept," said Liu Chin-hsu, secretary-general of the National Teachers' Association.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Who would want him as a lawyer anyways?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Getting paid to drink
LONDON (Reuters) - Found: drinking companions to join elderly gentleman for a friendly beer at his local pub.
Mike Hammond was bombarded with offers after advertising in his village post office for someone to accompany his 88-year-old father Jack on visits to a southern England pub from a nursing home.
He offered the lucky winner 7 pounds ($14) an hour plus expenses and, after sifting through the applicants, decided on a job-share. Drinking duties are to be divided between a retired doctor and a former military man.
----------------------------------------------------------------
That's probvably the Nose-pickin' Lawyer's next move.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man mowing his lawn discovers 7-10 foot
CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa - A Cedar Rapids man mowing his lawn has stumbled into a big hole — but the origin is a mystery. Rick Thompson discovered the hole on Wednesday. He says the grass seemed a little soft in that spot, and he blamed it on the rain. Then his leg sank up to his calf. He grabbed the lawn mower to stop himself from sinking any more.
Thompson started digging around the hole, which turned out to be 7-10 feet deep, with water and rusty pipes in the bottom.
----------------------------------------------------------------
(as Milli Vanilli lipsynching) "Blame It On The Rain".
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
State moves to ban fake testicles on vehicles
By Michael Peltier
TALLAHASSEE, Florida (Reuters) - Senate lawmakers in Florida have voted to ban the fake bull testicles that dangle from the trailer hitches of many trucks and cars throughout the state.
Republican Sen. Cary Baker, a gun shop owner from Eustis, Florida, called the adornments offensive and proposed the ban. Motorists would be fined $60 for displaying the novelty items, which are known by brand names like "Truck Nutz" and resemble the south end of a bull moving north.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Even I agree that testicles (real or fake) are disgusting on vehicles.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Ads seek ex-soldiers for smuggling jobs
By Herbert Hernandez
GUATEMALA CITY (Reuters) - Guatemala is investigating radio advertisements seeking elite ex-soldiers, who have been known to work for drug cartels, to smuggle goods into Mexico, officials said on Thursday.
The ads were broadcast in the lawless northern jungle region of Peten, home to a tough military training center for Kaibil soldiers, infamous during Guatemala's civil war as a brutal guerilla-fighting, special forces unit.
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Oh, c'mon! Haven't those soldiers been away from home for too long?!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Choir director brings prayers for lower gas prices to SF
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) - A choir director who hopes prayer can bring down high gas prices is trying out his approach at some of the costliest pumps in the country.
Rocky Twyman of Washington, D.C., came to San Francisco over the weekend to stage a pray-in at a Chevron station. He is also calling on churchgoers to ask for God's intervention where he says politicians have failed.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And while you're at it, bring prayers for lower gas prices in Texas.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Scratching cat in lap blamed for causing accident
MODESTO, Calif. - Modesto police are blaming a scratching cat for an accident that toppled a power pole and shut down a street for nearly an hour. A police sergeant said Friday that a woman was driving with a cat in her lap. The animal scratched her, and she drove into the pole.
The woman suffered minor injuries and was taken to a hospital. The cat was taken to a vet to treat an injured eye.
----------------------------------------------------------------
What ever happened to putting your pet in a cage?
By Michael Peltier
TALLAHASSEE, Florida (Reuters) - Senate lawmakers in Florida have voted to ban the fake bull testicles that dangle from the trailer hitches of many trucks and cars throughout the state.
Republican Sen. Cary Baker, a gun shop owner from Eustis, Florida, called the adornments offensive and proposed the ban. Motorists would be fined $60 for displaying the novelty items, which are known by brand names like "Truck Nutz" and resemble the south end of a bull moving north.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Even I agree that testicles (real or fake) are disgusting on vehicles.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Ads seek ex-soldiers for smuggling jobs
By Herbert Hernandez
GUATEMALA CITY (Reuters) - Guatemala is investigating radio advertisements seeking elite ex-soldiers, who have been known to work for drug cartels, to smuggle goods into Mexico, officials said on Thursday.
The ads were broadcast in the lawless northern jungle region of Peten, home to a tough military training center for Kaibil soldiers, infamous during Guatemala's civil war as a brutal guerilla-fighting, special forces unit.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, c'mon! Haven't those soldiers been away from home for too long?!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Choir director brings prayers for lower gas prices to SF
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) - A choir director who hopes prayer can bring down high gas prices is trying out his approach at some of the costliest pumps in the country.
Rocky Twyman of Washington, D.C., came to San Francisco over the weekend to stage a pray-in at a Chevron station. He is also calling on churchgoers to ask for God's intervention where he says politicians have failed.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And while you're at it, bring prayers for lower gas prices in Texas.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Scratching cat in lap blamed for causing accident
MODESTO, Calif. - Modesto police are blaming a scratching cat for an accident that toppled a power pole and shut down a street for nearly an hour. A police sergeant said Friday that a woman was driving with a cat in her lap. The animal scratched her, and she drove into the pole.
The woman suffered minor injuries and was taken to a hospital. The cat was taken to a vet to treat an injured eye.
----------------------------------------------------------------
What ever happened to putting your pet in a cage?
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Manners are getting worse?
By Andrew Hough
LONDON (Reuters) - Britons are ruder than they were a decade ago, according to a survey on Monday that showed almost three-quarters of people think manners should be taught at school.
A third believe bad manners are the catalyst for much of the anti-social behavior in Britain, the ITV poll found.
Experts interviewed by the network blamed a lack of respect for authority.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Wasn't that the country that invented Manners?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Are lice art? Israelis scratch their heads
By Rebecca Harrison
BAT YAM, Israel (Reuters) - From pickled cows to elephant dung, the art world is no stranger to offbeat ideas. But a group of lice-infested Germans?
Seven young artists from Berlin are trying to stretch the boundaries of art by living in an Israeli museum for three weeks with lice in their hair.
"Art is no longer just a painting on the wall," Milana Gitzin-Adiram, chief curator of the Museum of Bat Yam near Tel Aviv, told Reuters. "Art is life, life is art."
----------------------------------------------------------------
We know that. What I wanna know is why use something that'll get loose and into other people's hair?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Official sees "destructive" Barbie influence
TEHRAN (Reuters) - Imports of Barbie dolls and other Western toys will have destructive cultural and social consequences in Iran, the Islamic Republic's top prosecutor was quoted as saying on Monday.
Iran's conservative clerical establishment often rails against the perceived dangers of U.S.-inspired culture and consumerism, branding it "Westoxication."
But young Iranians are often keen consumers of such music, films and other goods from the West. Iconic toy brands can be bought in children's shops in the capital Tehran and elsewhere.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, PLEASE!!! I'm not a fan of Barbie dolls, but
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Saudi governor orders haircuts for men who hit on women
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia (AP) - Local media reports say a governor in northern Saudi Arabia has ordered authorities to punish men who flirt with women in public places by cutting their hair.
Several Saudi newspapers, including Al Hayat, say Prince Fahd bin Badr ordered police Sunday to carry out the punishment after seeing a group of men with long hair pestering female students as they left school in the town of Skaka.
Many clergymen in this conservative Gulf country say men should not have long hair because Islam prohibits the sexes from emulating each other.
----------------------------------------------------------------
"No!! Not my 'Guitar Hero' hair!"
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oregon fishing spot drains on opening day
CENTRAL POINT, Ore. (AP) - Opening day was drained out at a popular Southern Oregon fishing spot. Angler Doug Evans took his family to a pond in the Denman Wildlife Area at noon Saturday. The water level quickly seemed to dip and then it dipped some more.
It wasn't his imagination.
By 4 p.m., the pond was dry, transformed into a mudhole populated with dying carp, catfish and blue gill.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Alright! Who's been siphoning the lake water?
By Andrew Hough
LONDON (Reuters) - Britons are ruder than they were a decade ago, according to a survey on Monday that showed almost three-quarters of people think manners should be taught at school.
A third believe bad manners are the catalyst for much of the anti-social behavior in Britain, the ITV poll found.
Experts interviewed by the network blamed a lack of respect for authority.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Wasn't that the country that invented Manners?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Are lice art? Israelis scratch their heads
By Rebecca Harrison
BAT YAM, Israel (Reuters) - From pickled cows to elephant dung, the art world is no stranger to offbeat ideas. But a group of lice-infested Germans?
Seven young artists from Berlin are trying to stretch the boundaries of art by living in an Israeli museum for three weeks with lice in their hair.
"Art is no longer just a painting on the wall," Milana Gitzin-Adiram, chief curator of the Museum of Bat Yam near Tel Aviv, told Reuters. "Art is life, life is art."
----------------------------------------------------------------
We know that. What I wanna know is why use something that'll get loose and into other people's hair?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Official sees "destructive" Barbie influence
TEHRAN (Reuters) - Imports of Barbie dolls and other Western toys will have destructive cultural and social consequences in Iran, the Islamic Republic's top prosecutor was quoted as saying on Monday.
Iran's conservative clerical establishment often rails against the perceived dangers of U.S.-inspired culture and consumerism, branding it "Westoxication."
But young Iranians are often keen consumers of such music, films and other goods from the West. Iconic toy brands can be bought in children's shops in the capital Tehran and elsewhere.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, PLEASE!!! I'm not a fan of Barbie dolls, but
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Saudi governor orders haircuts for men who hit on women
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia (AP) - Local media reports say a governor in northern Saudi Arabia has ordered authorities to punish men who flirt with women in public places by cutting their hair.
Several Saudi newspapers, including Al Hayat, say Prince Fahd bin Badr ordered police Sunday to carry out the punishment after seeing a group of men with long hair pestering female students as they left school in the town of Skaka.
Many clergymen in this conservative Gulf country say men should not have long hair because Islam prohibits the sexes from emulating each other.
----------------------------------------------------------------
"No!! Not my 'Guitar Hero' hair!"
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Oregon fishing spot drains on opening day
CENTRAL POINT, Ore. (AP) - Opening day was drained out at a popular Southern Oregon fishing spot. Angler Doug Evans took his family to a pond in the Denman Wildlife Area at noon Saturday. The water level quickly seemed to dip and then it dipped some more.
It wasn't his imagination.
By 4 p.m., the pond was dry, transformed into a mudhole populated with dying carp, catfish and blue gill.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Alright! Who's been siphoning the lake water?
0 likes
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
Guy tears hair out over hairdresser's phone
BERLIN (Reuters) - Police helping a German man track down a nuisance caller discovered his tormentor for two years was a faulty card payment system in a hairdresser's shop.
The 58-year-old man in Frankfurt did not recognize the Hamburg number that kept ringing him and had it blocked.
After several months, he got tired of paying for the blocking service and the calls began again on working days.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And he thought it was a prankster inside the store.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
So, you don't like the color, right?
BEIJING (Reuters) - A 2 million yuan ($286,000) sculpture in northeastern China that took two years to build was dismantled days before its unveiling because a senior government official disliked the color, local media said on Tuesday.
"Fly," a show-piece installation at a new airport terminal in China's northern port city of Tianjin, was taken down after a local vice-mayor took exception to it while touring the terminal three weeks before its opening, a report posted on the official China Central Television (CCTV) Web site said.
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What color did he see? PLAID?!?!?!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Minor league hockey player charged after caught streaking
SCRANTON, Pa. (AP) - The captain of the Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins was charged with indecent exposure after a police officer saw him running naked on a downtown street early Sunday, and a teammate was arrested for public drunkenness. Nathan Smith told the officer he acted on a bet.
Officials said Smith, a center for the AHL team, was charged with misdemeanor counts of indecent exposure, open lewdness and disorderly conduct, as well as public drunkenness. He was released on $10,000 bail.
----------------------------------------------------------------
That reporter didn't say "Streak", did he?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Newspaper carrier finds woman pinned by husband's dead body
By JIM SUHR, Associated Press Writer
ST. LOUIS - Newspaper carrier Bruce Pitts knew the elderly couple only by the prayers the wife made for him while he was working at night and in bad weather, but he felt something was wrong when the papers piled up outside their home.
"It was never like them to leave a newspaper in their tube," Pitt said Tuesday. "That wonderful, small voice inside me said, `This isn't right.'"
After his route early Sunday, Pitts went home, napped briefly and, with his wife, returned to Blanche and Fred Roberts' home, just outside Marion, Ill.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Some things are just out of the norm when you're on the job.
BERLIN (Reuters) - Police helping a German man track down a nuisance caller discovered his tormentor for two years was a faulty card payment system in a hairdresser's shop.
The 58-year-old man in Frankfurt did not recognize the Hamburg number that kept ringing him and had it blocked.
After several months, he got tired of paying for the blocking service and the calls began again on working days.
----------------------------------------------------------------
And he thought it was a prankster inside the store.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
So, you don't like the color, right?
BEIJING (Reuters) - A 2 million yuan ($286,000) sculpture in northeastern China that took two years to build was dismantled days before its unveiling because a senior government official disliked the color, local media said on Tuesday.
"Fly," a show-piece installation at a new airport terminal in China's northern port city of Tianjin, was taken down after a local vice-mayor took exception to it while touring the terminal three weeks before its opening, a report posted on the official China Central Television (CCTV) Web site said.
----------------------------------------------------------------
What color did he see? PLAID?!?!?!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Minor league hockey player charged after caught streaking
SCRANTON, Pa. (AP) - The captain of the Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins was charged with indecent exposure after a police officer saw him running naked on a downtown street early Sunday, and a teammate was arrested for public drunkenness. Nathan Smith told the officer he acted on a bet.
Officials said Smith, a center for the AHL team, was charged with misdemeanor counts of indecent exposure, open lewdness and disorderly conduct, as well as public drunkenness. He was released on $10,000 bail.
----------------------------------------------------------------
That reporter didn't say "Streak", did he?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Newspaper carrier finds woman pinned by husband's dead body
By JIM SUHR, Associated Press Writer
ST. LOUIS - Newspaper carrier Bruce Pitts knew the elderly couple only by the prayers the wife made for him while he was working at night and in bad weather, but he felt something was wrong when the papers piled up outside their home.
"It was never like them to leave a newspaper in their tube," Pitt said Tuesday. "That wonderful, small voice inside me said, `This isn't right.'"
After his route early Sunday, Pitts went home, napped briefly and, with his wife, returned to Blanche and Fred Roberts' home, just outside Marion, Ill.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Some things are just out of the norm when you're on the job.
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TexasStooge
- Category 5
- Posts: 38127
- Joined: Tue Mar 25, 2003 1:22 pm
- Location: Irving (Dallas County), TX
- Contact:
Re: "Hamwinkies" The Crazy News Thread
German politician may auction his beard
BERLIN (Reuters) - The head of Germany's Social Democrats, who has ambitions to be his country's next leader, is thinking about donating his beard to charity, but is not quite sure.
Kurt Beck, who as party leader has a strong claim to lead the SPD into next year's national election, said in a panel discussion in Mainz that he might shave off his beard to raise 1 million euros ($1.5 million) for charity, the newspaper Bild am Sonntag reported.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I don't want it...unless it's fake.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Official suspended for surfing stuff at work
TOKYO (Reuters) - A city bureaucrat in western Japan was suspended from his job after officials discovered he visited stuff websites at work almost every day, often spending hours gazing at nude photos, a city official said.
The 57-year-old man, who was working in the construction division of Kinokawa City in Wakayama, surfed stuff sites from an office computer almost every day for eight months from June 2007, spending up to three hours a day on the websites, said Kazuhiko Ueyama, a Kinokawa City official.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Ooooohhh, XXX.com..OOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Illinois man orders custom beer-can coffin
SOUTH CHICAGO HEIGHTS, Ill. (AP) - Bill Bramanti will love Pabst Blue Ribbon eternally, and he's got the custom-made beer-can casket to prove it.
"I actually fit, because I got in here," said Bramanti of South Chicago Heights.
The 67-year-old Glenwood village administrator doesn't plan on needing it anytime soon, though.
----------------------------------------------------------------
He's wanting people to look at him and go "Jeez, he partied."
__________________________________________________________________________________________
NYPD horse throws officer off, then makes his way home alone
NEW YORK (AP) - Police say a patrol horse found his own way back through Manhattan streets to his stable after throwing his rider.
The officer was treated for minor injuries after traffic noise spooked Aldo on Friday. The 8-year-old took off about eight blocks to the stable.
New York police spokesman Paul Browne says the horse "knows his turf."
----------------------------------------------------------------
That horse is under investigation.
BERLIN (Reuters) - The head of Germany's Social Democrats, who has ambitions to be his country's next leader, is thinking about donating his beard to charity, but is not quite sure.
Kurt Beck, who as party leader has a strong claim to lead the SPD into next year's national election, said in a panel discussion in Mainz that he might shave off his beard to raise 1 million euros ($1.5 million) for charity, the newspaper Bild am Sonntag reported.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I don't want it...unless it's fake.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Official suspended for surfing stuff at work
TOKYO (Reuters) - A city bureaucrat in western Japan was suspended from his job after officials discovered he visited stuff websites at work almost every day, often spending hours gazing at nude photos, a city official said.
The 57-year-old man, who was working in the construction division of Kinokawa City in Wakayama, surfed stuff sites from an office computer almost every day for eight months from June 2007, spending up to three hours a day on the websites, said Kazuhiko Ueyama, a Kinokawa City official.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Ooooohhh, XXX.com..OOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Illinois man orders custom beer-can coffin
SOUTH CHICAGO HEIGHTS, Ill. (AP) - Bill Bramanti will love Pabst Blue Ribbon eternally, and he's got the custom-made beer-can casket to prove it.
"I actually fit, because I got in here," said Bramanti of South Chicago Heights.
The 67-year-old Glenwood village administrator doesn't plan on needing it anytime soon, though.
----------------------------------------------------------------
He's wanting people to look at him and go "Jeez, he partied."
__________________________________________________________________________________________
NYPD horse throws officer off, then makes his way home alone
NEW YORK (AP) - Police say a patrol horse found his own way back through Manhattan streets to his stable after throwing his rider.
The officer was treated for minor injuries after traffic noise spooked Aldo on Friday. The 8-year-old took off about eight blocks to the stable.
New York police spokesman Paul Browne says the horse "knows his turf."
----------------------------------------------------------------
That horse is under investigation.
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