To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

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southerngale
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To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

#1 Postby southerngale » Wed Oct 29, 2008 11:44 am

1. At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to Espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For marijuana"

7. Finish all your sentences with, "in accordance with the prophecy."

9. Skip down the hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.

10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go".

12. Sing along at the opera.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends that you can't attend their party because you have a headache.

17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives! They're loose!"

19. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
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dizzyfish
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Re: To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

#2 Postby dizzyfish » Wed Oct 29, 2008 12:09 pm

#3 - I've actually done that! :lol: :P

#11 - You won't believe this - I was once ASKED if my order was "to go" when I went through a drive thru. :roll:
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Cyclenall
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#3 Postby Cyclenall » Wed Oct 29, 2008 12:13 pm

Number 18 was the best one, that would be funny.
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Brent
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Re:

#4 Postby Brent » Wed Oct 29, 2008 3:02 pm

Cyclenall wrote:Number 18 was the best one, that would be funny.


:lol:
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#5 Postby JonathanBelles » Wed Oct 29, 2008 3:07 pm

What happened to #'s 4, 8, and 13?
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southerngale
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#6 Postby southerngale » Wed Oct 29, 2008 3:35 pm

fact789 wrote:What happened to #'s 4, 8, and 13?


LOL - good question. I copied it and didn't notice that. I'd fix it, but then it would mess up the above replies.
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Re: To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

#7 Postby Stephanie » Wed Oct 29, 2008 6:23 pm

Those were good! :lol:
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Re: Re:

#8 Postby Cryomaniac » Sun Nov 02, 2008 9:10 am

southerngale wrote:
fact789 wrote:What happened to #'s 4, 8, and 13?


LOL - good question. I copied it and didn't notice that. I'd fix it, but then it would mess up the above replies.


Well, 4 is unlucky in the far east, 8 is unlucky to Discworld wizards and 13 is unlucky in the west, maybe the person who made the list was a Chinese-American wizard :lol: ?
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Dionne
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Re: To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

#9 Postby Dionne » Sun Nov 02, 2008 9:32 am

#20.....Remedy standing in long voting lines by painting red spots on your face and cough uncontrolled.
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