I Love Mustard

[angelwing]

I Love Mustard

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As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thick slab of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands, but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side...

"Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich," she said.

I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers...

I love mustard. I had no napkin. I licked it off.

It was not mustard.

No man ever put a baby down faster.

It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding out.

With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife Said, "Now you know why they call that fancy mustard .......


'Poupon.'"

[southerngale]

LOL & excuse me while I go throw up...

[vbhoutex]

ROFLMAO!!! Classic.

[JonathanBelles]

ROFL! Discusting! LOL