NEVER SAY TO A COP
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8. I pay your salary!
9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other
cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
12. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
What not to say to a cop
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What not to say to a cop
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stormraiser
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Skywatch_NC
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Re: What not to say to a cop
4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
I wonder if the Duke boys ever said that to Roscoe P. Coltrane?
I wonder if the Duke boys ever said that to Roscoe P. Coltrane?
Last edited by Skywatch_NC on Thu Feb 19, 2004 1:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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GalvestonDuck
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stormraiser
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GalvestonDuck
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stormraiser
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southerngale
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my Cowboys -
Bunch
Several years ago, a group of us went out for the evening, and one of the group told all the bartenders that he was the Designated Driver, because the bars always gave free soft drinks to designated drivers. What none of us knew at the time, though, was that he was taking the free soft drinks, and adding to them from a bottle in his inside coat pocket.
Later in the evening, when pulled over, he looked indignantly at the officer, and inquired:
"Why did you pull me over? I was elected to say stober. . ."
True story.
Later in the evening, when pulled over, he looked indignantly at the officer, and inquired:
"Why did you pull me over? I was elected to say stober. . ."
True story.
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stormraiser
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Some friend-
mf_dolphin
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When I was in the military several of us went to the NCO club for some drinks. On the way back to the barracks the military cops pulled over our obviously drunk driver. After handcuffing him the cop asked if anyone was sober enough to drive. One of the guys in the back said yes and as he went to get out of the car he fell flat on his face! Needless to say the rest of us got a lift to the lockup until they could get someone to come pick us up. LOL
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azskyman
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Still like this one.
Woman pulled over for speeding. Officer comes up to the window and asks for her license and registration.
"Gee, officer. I didn't know I was driving THAT fast! By the way, are those flies buzzing around your head?"
"You were driving that fast, and I don't see any flies," he replied.
"We'll they are the kind that you normally see around a horse's rear end."
"Are you implying I'm a horse's ass, Miss?"
"No, officer, I would never do that. But those flies sure seem to think so!"
Woman pulled over for speeding. Officer comes up to the window and asks for her license and registration.
"Gee, officer. I didn't know I was driving THAT fast! By the way, are those flies buzzing around your head?"
"You were driving that fast, and I don't see any flies," he replied.
"We'll they are the kind that you normally see around a horse's rear end."
"Are you implying I'm a horse's ass, Miss?"
"No, officer, I would never do that. But those flies sure seem to think so!"
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Guest
azskyman wrote:Still like this one.
Woman pulled over for speeding. Officer comes up to the window and asks for her license and registration.
"Gee, officer. I didn't know I was driving THAT fast! By the way, are those flies buzzing around your head?"
"You were driving that fast, and I don't see any flies," he replied.
"We'll they are the kind that you normally see around a horse's rear end."
"Are you implying I'm a horse's ass, Miss?"
"No, officer, I would never do that. But those flies sure seem to think so!"
Then the officer procedes, "Out of the car miss."
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blizzard
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azskyman wrote:Still like this one.
Woman pulled over for speeding. Officer comes up to the window and asks for her license and registration.
"Gee, officer. I didn't know I was driving THAT fast! By the way, are those flies buzzing around your head?"
"You were driving that fast, and I don't see any flies," he replied.
"We'll they are the kind that you normally see around a horse's rear end."
"Are you implying I'm a horse's ass, Miss?"
"No, officer, I would never do that. But those flies sure seem to think so!"
I know that this is supposed to be a humorous thread, and I take it that way, but if this were to be true, which is questionable. The lady needs a swift kick in the butt. She is implying that the police officer is a horse's ass because she was caught doing something that she wasn't supposed to be doing and she knew it. Why take your own stupidity and mistakes out on the enforcement authority. Sorry for the rant on this humorous thread, but it just chaps my hind end....
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firefighter16
blizzard wrote:azskyman wrote:Still like this one.
Woman pulled over for speeding. Officer comes up to the window and asks for her license and registration.
"Gee, officer. I didn't know I was driving THAT fast! By the way, are those flies buzzing around your head?"
"You were driving that fast, and I don't see any flies," he replied.
"We'll they are the kind that you normally see around a horse's rear end."
"Are you implying I'm a horse's ass, Miss?"
"No, officer, I would never do that. But those flies sure seem to think so!"
I know that this is supposed to be a humorous thread, and I take it that way, but if this were to be true, which is questionable. The lady needs a swift kick in the butt. She is implying that the police officer is a horse's ass because she was caught doing something that she wasn't supposed to be doing and she knew it. Why take your own stupidity and mistakes out on the enforcement authority. Sorry for the rant on this humorous thread, but it just chaps my hind end....
Want some Talcom powder Blizz ?????
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southerngale
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