the miracle of toilet paper

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chadtm80

the miracle of toilet paper

#1 Postby chadtm80 » Mon May 17, 2004 1:43 pm

the miracle of toilet paper

The Miracle of Toilet Paper:
Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically
telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.
"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of
toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds". Willing to
try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the
mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I ask.
"They will grow larger over a period of years," he replies. I stop. "Do you
really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day
will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without missing a beat he
says, "Worked for your butt , didn't it?" He's still alive, and with a
great deal of therapy, may even walk again.
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GalvestonDuck
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#2 Postby GalvestonDuck » Mon May 17, 2004 1:47 pm

If that was the case, wouldn't she think her hubby would use it too, instead of doing the "shake?"
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#3 Postby stormraiser » Mon May 17, 2004 1:57 pm

:lol: Once Jen reads that, Chad, we'll pray that your recovery goes well
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#4 Postby vbhoutex » Mon May 17, 2004 1:57 pm

TMI!!!TMI!!!!
:roflmao: :hehe: :roflmao: :hehe: :roflmao: :hehe: :roflmao: :hehe: :roflmao: :hehe: :roflmao: :hehe:
Last edited by vbhoutex on Mon May 17, 2004 2:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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#5 Postby HurricaneGirl » Mon May 17, 2004 2:07 pm

:D Very nice!! :lol:
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#6 Postby Guest » Mon May 17, 2004 2:09 pm

Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings. ;) So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...

P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.
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#7 Postby GalvestonDuck » Mon May 17, 2004 2:18 pm

mrschad wrote:Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings. ;) So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...

P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.


LOL, yup! :wink:
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#8 Postby Stephanie » Mon May 17, 2004 2:31 pm

mrschad wrote:Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings. ;) So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...

P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.


LOL!!!! It's going to get ugly at their house!!!
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#9 Postby stormraiser » Mon May 17, 2004 2:33 pm

In the words of a fellow board member
GalvestonDuck wrote:LOL, yup! :)
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#10 Postby southerngale » Mon May 17, 2004 5:21 pm

LOL!! Get 'em Jen! :lol:
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#11 Postby Brent » Mon May 17, 2004 5:39 pm

mrschad wrote:Chad is a bad bad man, lol. This story could easily be turned around by replacing the woman with a man, who would be questioning his, er, shortcomings. ;) So from that point of view, I can LMAO at this story.
...Jennifer...

P.S. I just realized we're insinuating the same thing Duck, lol.


:lol: :lol: :lol:
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#12 Postby Josephine96 » Mon May 17, 2004 7:20 pm

LOL
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#13 Postby azskyman » Mon May 17, 2004 8:38 pm

I doubt very much Chad that the fat lip you wake up with tomorrow will have anything at all to do with toilet paper. You may need it to stop the bleeding though.
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#14 Postby mf_dolphin » Mon May 17, 2004 8:40 pm

CHAD FOR PRESIDENT!!!! :-)
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#15 Postby timNms » Mon May 17, 2004 8:58 pm

Chad, you are in BIG trouble!
Now I need to go get a tissue to wipe the tears from my eyes. I'm laughing so hard!
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#16 Postby Pburgh » Tue May 18, 2004 1:14 pm

How did I miss this yesterday!!!!!!!!
ROTFLMAO

Chad?????? Are you there???????? Can you hear me??????
Last edited by Pburgh on Tue May 18, 2004 2:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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#17 Postby Guest » Tue May 18, 2004 2:09 pm

Chad and I always joke with each other about the opposite sex. For years now, even our friends "play" boys against girls. This goes along with almost everything we do (from card games, to whose the smarter sex, to who has final say, etc). The women almost always hold the upper hand (we have to let the men win sometimes so that they'll keep playing along). I guess Chad figures since this is his and Marshall's board, that the men might have a fighting chance. Wrong!!! lol. When are men ever going to learn?
...Jennifer...
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#18 Postby Pburgh » Tue May 18, 2004 2:25 pm

I guess if they want a board where they can win, they should start and "all male" board!!!!!!!lol
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#19 Postby GalvestonDuck » Tue May 18, 2004 2:36 pm

Pburgh wrote:I guess if they want a board where they can win, they should start and "all male" board!!!!!!!lol


But then who's going to correct them when they're wrong and tease them when they're silly? They can't do that on their own. :)
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#20 Postby Pburgh » Tue May 18, 2004 2:47 pm

Oh Ducky, you're so wise. I didn't think of that!!!lol
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