Just when I thought all was quiet..

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Josephine96

Just when I thought all was quiet..

#1 Postby Josephine96 » Sat Jun 19, 2004 6:12 pm

I had finally stopped worrying about Ms. Casandra.. and she obviously is no longer my number 1 worry.

But I just came home after spending the afternoon out with a chilling message that said "Hey John.. this is Cassie.. I am in the hospital again.. Call ya tomorrow sometime.. bye"..

I already know I can only be a friend to her at this point. and I can't guarantee she's in there again for cutting {though I'd bet my life savings on it}.

I will talk to her if she calls and I'm actually here to receive it. lol.. But what do I tell her.. The 1st couple times I told her the "You have to stop doing this to yourself" routine.. But apparently that obviously didn't work.

Should I give her the tough love approach?.. Should I completely disband myself from her? {even though I still want to be her friend}. Or should I just sit back and eventually watch her slowly die. {Not expecting that to happen, but Mom has always told me that ALL cutters eventually die because sooner or later they cut the right spot or don't get caught in time or whatever {good pick me up huh lol}..}

I'm not going to let this eat at me because I have too many much more important issues right now.. But.. I am a tad bit worried. I just wish I knew why she was doing this to herself, especially so constantly
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#2 Postby Skywatch_NC » Sat Jun 19, 2004 6:30 pm

John,

Has Cassie sought some counseling from a professional about her on-going problem? :(

My prayers and thoughts continue for her and her family and friends...and she's VERY Blessed and fortunate to have you in her life, too. :)

Eric
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#3 Postby Rainband » Sat Jun 19, 2004 6:34 pm

Your a good friend John But is she being a good friend to you?? She needs to get help and stop hurting the people that care about her. :(
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#4 Postby Guest » Sat Jun 19, 2004 7:01 pm

Skywatch_NC wrote:My prayers and thoughts continue for her and her family and friends...and she's VERY Blessed and fortunate to have you in her life, too. :)


That is true. If individuals like Cassie are COMPLETELY disconnected from the outside world, sometimes they could end up in severe depression along with the typically accompanying suicidal thoughts. I think she knows you care about her; she stays in touch with you. BUT...

Rainband wrote:
Your a good friend John But is she being a good friend to you?? She needs to get help and stop hurting the people that care about her.


Cassie needs to understand that what she is doing, or, (cringe) what she may be thinking of doing in the future to herself or others, is VERY hurtful emotionally and mentally to those who care about her, friends, etc. If I knew someone like this, I would be very worried. I would probably go as far as intervening if I caught the person trying to hurt themselves if I could safely take care of the problem.

Basically, what Rainband said, she needs to get some serious help, and with my very uneducated guess (I only took an Intro Psychology class recently...:lol:), a mental hospital might not be what Cassie needs. Perhaps some one-on-one counseling with her and her family may be needed.

Prayers with Cassie, her family and you! :)
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#5 Postby coriolis » Sat Jun 19, 2004 7:50 pm

John, I'm not sure that there's anything that you can say or do to help her. Neither gentle reminders or a tough love approach will do any good. I'm beginning to wonder if she's using this whole situation in a manipulative manner towards you. Not that she has bad intent, but it may be part of the illness. It seems that you and her go round and round in a repeating pattern. You may be feeling as if you need to be her hero, and she's finding someone who will be sympathetic, but not a threat to really make her change. She needs some heavy duty therapy, and possibly some meds if there's an acute crisis. You may want to consider some counseling for yourself to help you sort this out and help her in a healthy way. You may be advised to not try to help her, I don't know. But definitely, it is not your responsibility, or even in your ability to "save" her. She needs more help than you can give her. If she's in the hospital, I'm sure that they have lots of suggestions for assistance, therapy, programs, and agencies that can help. Is her family involved in this? I'm finding that in my situation, counseling for the entire family is very useful because many problems that manifest themselves in the children start with family issues.
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#6 Postby Josephine96 » Sat Jun 19, 2004 7:53 pm

I do not know if she's been seeing any counselors. School ended for the year here on May 25th and I haven't heard from her in over a month {until today}.

I do agree that she needs serious professional help, and I also agree she needs it ASAP.

This is the 1st time she's called me since May 20th. That was the night I skipped graduation of my alma mater because I decided to wait for her return phone call that never came lol..

Anyway.. I just wish I knew what was causing her to do this much. She's told me about a lot of traumas from her past. But I didn't think they'd cause her to do anything.

I also hate that everytime she calls.. I'm never home lol.. It's like I can't catch a break lol..

If I'm home the next time she calls.. I may ask her where exactly she is and if she's allowed visitors. Then I'll go see her on Monday myself {if she calls tomorrow}..

Mom has told me countless times though that maybe it'd be better for me not to go see her. I always seem to get mixed signals from her lol..

Anyway.. Lots of prayers will be going her way when I'm at church tomorrow
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#7 Postby Brent » Sat Jun 19, 2004 8:16 pm

I don't know what you should say either... cutting is defintely not good. :eek:

She also CERTAINLY needs help, NOW.
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