The Stupid Crimes & Misdemeanors Thread

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#141 Postby TexasStooge » Fri Jun 25, 2004 11:38 am

Request for big bills ruins bank heist

MONTGOMERY COUNTY, Pa. (Court TV) - Bad timing and banking industry red-tape derailed Andre Lamar Henderson's alleged bank heist.

According to Montgomery County, Pa., police, Henderson walked into a Plymouth Township bank June 11 at 5:40 p.m. with an explicit request: "Give me all your hundreds and fifties fast."

He approached a teller with the note but got some unexpected news.

"The bank teller told him that she only had a single $50 bill," Detective Jeff McGee said. "He hit the bank towards closing time and it's banking policy to put away big bills around that time."

The 30-year-old man allegedly took the single bill but said, "Don't make me come back there and get more."

A bank manager operating a vacuum cleaner nearby turned off the machine and overheard Henderson. The alleged robber got nervous and fled in a waiting car. The manager wrote down the vehicle's number.

The car's license number was matched to a Philadelphia address, and McGee contacted police in that city. Philadelphia police were waiting when Henderson and his alleged getaway driver, Lisa Terry Hanna, drove up to Hanna's home.

Henderson admitted that the incident at the bank caught him off-guard, according to police.

"He said that when he got back to the car he was very upset that he only came away with $50," McGee said. "He decided that he was going to rob another bank that he had hit previously."

Henderson and Hanna are being held in the Montgomery County jail. They are charged with robbery, theft by unlawful taking, receiving stolen property, criminal conspiracy and more.

Henderson is wanted in four other counties on similar charges.
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#142 Postby TexasStooge » Fri Jun 25, 2004 11:39 am

Blind man drives for drunk friend

PEACHTREE CITY, Ga. (Court TV) - Michael Johnston knew he was too drunk to drive his golf cart, so he recruited a friend to take care of the driving. Good idea.

His choice for designated driver, however, was his blind friend. Bad idea.

Johnston, 47, and Samuel McClain, who is legally blind, were recently charged with reckless conduct.

According to Peachtree City, Ga., police, Johnston and McClain, 35, were trying to get to a Mexican restaurant two miles away from Johnston's home. But Johnston, who had consumed more than five beers, decided McClain should do the driving. McClain's seeing-eye dog came along.

Police Captain Jim Murray said Johnston directed McClain through the two miles to the restaurant, telling the visually impaired man when and how to make turns and when to slow down.

The two men arrived at the restaurant safely, Murray said. But when McClain tried to park the golf cart, he allegedly hit another car.

No DUI charges were filed because McClain was not intoxicated and Johnston was not driving. They will be arraigned July 11 and could face a $1,000 fine or up to a year in jail.
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#143 Postby TexasStooge » Sat Jun 26, 2004 12:39 pm

Woman Stabs Partner Over Soccer Match

BERLIN, Germany (Reuters) - Passions surrounding Germany's final match at the Euro 2004 soccer championships turned violent when a woman stabbed her partner in the head because she didn't want to watch the game on television.

"He wanted to watch football, she didn't," said a police spokesman in the western city of Wuppertal on Thursday.

Police arrested the 31-year-old woman and confiscated the kitchen knife with which she gashed the man at the start of Germany's Group D tie against the Czech Republic on Wednesday. The man was treated in hospital and later released.

Germany lost the game 2-1 and crashed out of the tournament.
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#144 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jun 28, 2004 11:50 am

PHOTO FINISH: Three unidentified men in Everett, Wash., are accused of stealing a camera -- out of the hands of a woman who was taking pictures with it. The woman was an undercover police officer in the middle of a surveillance job. Backup officers swarmed the men, who ran. One of them raced off in a pickup truck and was cornered. He jumped out of his vehicle, but didn't put it in park first. The pickup ran him over, making him a bit easier to catch. As the various suspects ran, they dumped incriminating evidence including a gun, drugs, and other items. All three were arrested. (Everett Herald) ...Sadly, none of it was captured on camera.
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#145 Postby TexasStooge » Fri Jul 02, 2004 11:20 am

Teens terrorize local statues

EATON COUNTY, Mich. (Court TV) — Mascots and lawn ornaments — and those who care about them — can rest easily again.

Police recently caught up with a gang of statue-napping high school seniors and put an end to their escapades.

But the rescue came too late for one big bird.

According to Eaton County Police Captain Fred McPhail, the idea to steal oversized mascots and statues from local businesses started as a prank for bragging rights among four local teens. Their names have not been released.

Their first target was a popular green ogre and movie star.

"They stole an inflatable Shrek off of Burger King," Captain McPhail said. "They also had their eye on Big Boy from Big Boy restaurant."

Luckily for the cherub-faced Big Boy, the teens hit another area restaurant first: Joe's Gizzard City, home to a 13-foot-tall Fiberglass chicken mascot. Not only was the fake bird too heavy to transport, it was secured with a lock and chain. So as not to leave empty-handed, perhaps, the vandals decapitated the chicken with a hacksaw.

McPhail said the teens passed the severed head among their friends, but when police tracked down a suspect, the others tried to destroy the evidence. They took the head to a field and attempted to burn it.

Eventually, one of the teens came forward and confessed to the beheading and other heists, according to McPhail. The teens had also allegedly stolen a 300-pound concrete cow from a farm. The cow and Shrek were recovered and returned to their owners.

The teens have not been charged with a crime.

"Their parents are trying to raise money to pay for the chicken," McPhail said. "But they have until the end of the month. If they don't pay up the owner wants to prosecute."

The teens would face charges of malicious destruction of property if they are unable to pay for the mascot. Damage to the mascot is estimated at $6,700.
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#146 Postby TexasStooge » Thu Jul 08, 2004 11:15 am

Parking goof derails bank robbery

BEAVERTON, Oregon (Court TV) - Knute Falk planned his first bank robbery by the book. He had a mask to hide his face, a loaded gun to wave at bank employees and customers, a bag for the cash, and a getaway car. Yet his big debut went bust.

The 54-year-old Oregon man allegedly walked into a Beaverton Bank of America May 20 and announced he was there to rob the bank.

Police say Falk corralled bank employees and customers into a corner, but left one teller behind the counters to empty the drawers. He directed another teller to retrieve money from the vault.

According to Officer Mark Hyde, Falk's first robbery could have netted him $180,000 if he had parked a little closer to the bank.

Falk had parked his getaway car about a quarter-mile away. But when he wanted to make his escape he needed a faster way to get to his car.

"He took the keys to a customer's car, went out but was unable to unlock the car door," Hyde said.

Falk reportedly took off his mask and returned to the bank. The customer who had observed that Falk was having difficulty opening his car yelled out to the robber, "It's the silver Infiniti key!"

By the time Falk was able to make his escape police had already been alerted about the robbery and the car's description. They observed Falk coming from the direction of the bank and followed him to the parking lot where he left his original getaway car.

Falk was apprehended as he transferred money from one car to the other. He was indicted for armed robbery, and is being held in a Portland detention center.
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#147 Postby TexasStooge » Thu Jul 08, 2004 11:18 am

Religious fire starter faces judgment

SAN JOSE, Calif. (Court TV) - Matthew McCoy blames his personal woes for his bizarre attempt to rid the world of a statue.

The San Jose man was sentenced June 22 for setting a figure of Jesus on fire last November.

According to the San Mateo County Times, McCoy, 26, had been bothered for some time by the appearance of the statue in the courtyard of St. Bruno's Catholic Church. He has said he felt there was something odd about the statue because it featured Jesus wearing a silver robe and bleeding from the head without a crown of thorns. He didn't recognize this particular image of Jesus, he said.

But McCoy said his personal misfortunes — his girlfriend had just dumped him and he ran out of his unemployment benefits — pushed him over the edge and propelled him to take action.

"It was because of a woman," McCoy told the paper. "I thought I was doing a good thing for this church by removing an evil symbol."

McCoy attempted to break the plexiglass container that housed the statue but the glass withstood his assault. He then doused the container with gasoline and used his lighter to set the fire.

McCoy was arrested. He confessed to the crime and was charged with felony endangerment. The charge was later reduced to arson and he pleaded no contest.

McCoy was sentenced to a year in jail, but he received 327 days in jail for time served. According to the news report, he was placed on three years probation and ordered to pay $3,748 to the church for the damaged statue.
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#148 Postby TexasStooge » Thu Jul 08, 2004 11:21 am

Man Accused of Stealing Boy's Socks

COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) - A man accused of grabbing a 9-year-old boy, carrying him behind a Kroger store and stealing his socks has been arrested on kidnapping and robbery charges.

Maurice C. Teague told officers he has more than 500 pairs of children's socks.

Investigating officers said they couldn't confirm the number but said they found "a lot" of socks at Teague's home, police spokeswoman Sherry Mercurio said on Tuesday.

Police said Teague, 28, accosted the boy Friday evening and dropped a piece of identification as he fled. They arrested him at his home on Sunday, Mercurio said. He's jailed on $75,000 bond.

"It's odd, obviously — someone going after little boys' socks," Detective Guy Patete said.

Police said the child was on his way home from the grocery around 6:30 p.m. when Teague asked to buy his socks for $5. The boy refused again when Teague offered him $10, and Teague picked him up, ran behind the store and pulled the boy's shoes and socks off his feet.

Police said the boy picked up Teague's identification and his mother called police. Teague, who has no criminal record, at first denied the account but then admitted grabbing the boy, police said.
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#149 Postby TexasStooge » Thu Jul 08, 2004 11:23 am

Home Confinement Device Placed on Cat

PRINCETON, W.Va. (AP) - A 14-year-old girl under house arrest on charges of murdering her father escaped after cutting an electronic monitoring device off her ankle and gluing it to a cat, authorities said.

Police searched on Wednesday for Kayla Marie LaSala, who fled an uncle's house early Saturday.

If she thought pinning the device to the cat would fool authorities, it did not work: An alarm went off when a circuit in the device was broken, officials said. But she was gone before police could get there.

"She's very, very sharp. She's cunning," said sheriff's Detective C. T. Lowe.

Kayla is awaiting trial Sept. 7 on charges of stabbing her father to death in February. Sheriff's Sgt. A. D. Beasley said the motive for the slaying was unclear.

Lowe said Kayla told family members she planned to escape by July 2. He said the relatives were asleep when she fled.
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#150 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 12, 2004 12:22 pm

Thief swipes BBQ grill and meat

ROELAND PARK, Mo. (Court TV) — The thief who made off with Paul Kirk's barbecue grill is no vegetarian.

Police are looking for the suspect who stole Kirk's van, the custom-built grill attached to the vehicle, and barbecued meat — plenty of it.

Kirk, a nationally renowned barbeque champion and author, discovered the van and the $18,000 grill missing the morning of June 26. Also gone were several chickens, a half-dozen slabs of ribs and a dozen pounds of brisket he had prepared for a catering job.

According to Roeland Park Police Chief Rex Taylor, the thief did not have to work very hard for his lip-smacking payoff because Kirk left the keys in the van.

The van and grill were recovered three days later when residents of an apartment complex called to report a gigantic barbeque grill sitting in their parking lot.

The 5,000 pound grill showed no sign of recent use, police said. But Kirk's award-winning barbecued meat was nowhere to be found.

"As far as we're concerned this is a case of auto theft," Chief Taylor laughed when questioned about the missing meat.

The suspect is still at large.
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#151 Postby TexasStooge » Tue Jul 13, 2004 12:56 pm

Uh-oh! Looks like we got another Shrek stealer.

Police hunt for stolen "Shrek"

LONDON, England (Reuters) - Police say they have launched a hunt for thieves who stole a 5 foot tall model of friendly green ogre Shrek -- star of the blockbuster animated movie.

Two youths made off with the model, worth 500 pounds, from a fancy dress shop in Great Barr, near Birmingham, after throwing bricks through the window.

"If anyone has seen Shrek, been offered it for sale or has any information they should contact officers," West Midlands police said in a statement on Tuesday.

"Shrek 2", the sequel about the ogre and his princess bride, has been a smash box office hit, pulling in $418 million in North America alone.
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#152 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:30 pm

Crooked canine caught in statue heist

MCLEAN, Va. (Court TV) - Police have collared the thief who targeted Ruth Breiner's collection of garden statues.

He is furry, walks on four legs and goes by the name Magnum. The details of his nocturnal canine pursuits were caught on tape.

According to a police report, Breiner, 75, noticed in April that a ceramic baby raccoon was missing from the set of animal figurines located in her yard. The thief returned June 7 and made off with a fawn. A replacement deer disappeared June 14, and a squirrel two days later.

Suspecting she was the target of a prank Breiner contacted Fairfax County Police. Detectives decided to set up a surveillance camera in Breiner's yard, the report said.

The felonious pooch had become a seasoned statue-napper and was not camera-shy. On four different occasions, the camera caught Magnum, a black Labrador retriever, enter Breiner's yard late at night, scout his surroundings for eyewitnesses before making off with various garden ornaments in his mouth.

Police were unable to identify the dog at the time and sent out a press release asking for information leading to his capture.

Police spokesperson Officer Sophia Grinan said Magnum's owner came forward July 9 after a friend saw footage of Magnum on a local station's news report. The owner told them she found Magnum's stash of ceramic animals hidden in her backyard.

Magnum won't be getting a slap on the paw.

"Dogs don't have criminal intent and cannot be prosecuted," Grinan said.

Magnum's owner has returned the figurines to their rightful owner, although two are still unaccounted for.
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#153 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:32 pm

'Full monty' display lands man in jail

ST. PAUL, Minn. (Court TV) - Perhaps Daryl Miller thought making a full disclosure would speed up the airport security screening process. It turned out to be a faster way to land in jail.

The Minnesota man was waiting on line July 9 to get through airport security at Minnesota's St. Paul International Airport. According to an airport police officer, Miller was selected for a secondary screening process after he passed through the main security entrance.

When a male security screener waved a metal detection wand over the front of Miller's shorts, Miller dropped his shorts and said, "There, how do you like your job."

Miller was not wearing any underwear.

The screeners called airport police and Miller was arrested. The screeners told police that Miller had been confrontational earlier in the screening process. When a screener went through his bags, an expletive written on a note was found inside a magazine. Miller allegedly told the screener, "Yeah, it's for you."

Police charged Miller, said to be in his 40s, with indecent exposure. He was released on $300 bond. Police could not confirm if Miller returned to his flight.

He is scheduled to appear in a Minnesota court Aug. 4.
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#154 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:34 pm

Thief wanted in left-shoe theft

KANSAS CITY, Missouri (Court TV) - The thief who made off with Ray Staiger's collection of sneakers is going to have a hard time unloading the goods.

According to the Kansas City Star, Staiger, a Nike salesman, parked a van full of new athletic shoes in front of a hotel in Overland Park, Kan., July 6. When he returned to the vehicle the next morning he discovered that the 14 bags containing the shoe samples were missing.

Staiger estimated that the 312-shoe collection was worth about $10,789 if each of the stolen sneakers were matched with its right-foot partner.

The salesman planned on presenting the shoe samples to prospective buyers in Kansas City and Omaha. All 312 left shoes would then be matched up with their right-foot mates waiting in Missouri with another salesperson, the report said.

Overland Park Police do not have a suspect in the case.
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#155 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:35 pm

'Big bad wolf' wanted for pig-napping

The classic folk tale of the three little pigs is getting a modern-day revival in Gallatin, Tenn.

Police say Mary and Bobby Romine reported two of their concrete pig statues missing June 27. A ransom note signed "the big bad wolf" was left at the site of the abduction.

The wolf, perhaps having lost a taste for meat over the centuries, wanted two ears of corn and a ripe mango.

"We thought it was rather humorous," police spokesperson Kate Novitsky said. "But it's still a theft of property so we filed an incident report."

A day later, the Romines received a single serving of fried pork chop and a second note that read, "Cooked the pig."

The ransom notes were sent to a lab for fingerprints, but police are still waiting for the results.

Although the statues are only worth $10 each their owners are anxious to have them back, Novitsky said.

The "big bad wolf" would face a misdemeanor theft of property charge if caught.
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#156 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:42 pm

Parents charged with making fake carnival tickets

BARTLETT, Ill. (Court TV) - Police have shut down one family's Ferris-wheel fest.

Timothy and Carole Alexander are charged with making counterfeit tickets to bankroll summer-long admission for their children to a local amusement park. The joy rides came to a halt three days after they started.

According to a police document, carnival workers at Astro Amusement discovered the deception July 4 when one of the Alexander children attempted to board a ride with one of the fake tickets.

"The tickets were exceptionally similar, but there was enough of a slight difference in which the workers were able to tell they were not real," police spokesperson Sergeant Jessica Crawley said.

The workers alerted Bartlett police, who spoke with the girl and then conducted several interviews with her parents. Timothy and Carole Alexander, both 41, were later placed under arrest and charged with forgery.

Police allege that the couple manufactured hundreds of tickets and distributed them to their children and to as many as 20 other children who used them over the holiday weekend.

Police are not disclosing where or how the fake tickets were made. The original tickets are worth $1 apiece.

According to the Chicago Daily Herald, the Alexanders have denied the charges and maintain that they were approached by a man who offered them a bundle of tickets for $50. They thought the tickets were real.

The couple was released from DuPage County jail after posting $500 bond each. They are expected in court July 26. The forgery charge carries a sentence of probation or two to five years in prison.
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#157 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:44 pm

Angry mother batters giant rat

MACON COUNTY, Ga. (Court TV) - Chuck E. Cheese's is pizza and paradise for children, but not so for giant rats that cross angry mothers.

"The rodent got ransacked," Macon, Ga., police officer Roy Chesnutt said of the alleged beating the restaurant chain's mascot — a gray rodent with large front teeth — received at the hands of 31-year-old Keisha Guiche.

The incident occurred June 27 when the Macon woman visited the local Chuck E. Cheese's restaurant to celebrate her child's birthday. Police reports say Guiche was frustrated that the mascot, 17-year-old Jasmine Murchison, was spending more time with other children and not paying enough attention to her child.

The costumed Murchison and an assistant were leading other children in a dance at the time Guiche became upset, Chesnutt said. She failed to get their attention despite her vocal protests.

"She asked them, 'Hey, what about my kid? Pay attention to my kid!' She expected them to stop, but they didn't," the officer said.

Guiche grabbed Murchison by the arm. But Murchison allegedly ignored the irate mother and continued dancing with the children.

According to witnesses, Guiche then said, "I'm going to whip Chucky E. Cheese's ass if she gets out of that costume."

Guiche allegedly threw a slice of pizza at Murchison and then punched the mascot.

Murchison reported the incident to her manager who called police. Guiche admitted to police that she grabbed the mascot initially but denied hitting her.

No arrests were made. Murchison's family has urged her to file charges, Chesnutt said. If she does, Guiche would face simple battery charges for the tossed pizza slice.
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#158 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:46 pm

Robber pays for spilled coffee

MISSION CITY, Kan. (Court TV) - Sometimes even gun-toting robbers are plagued by guilt.

Police in Mission City, Kan., are looking for a suspect who robbed a convenience store and then made monetary amends for a spilled cup of coffee.

The suspect's June 24 crime spree started at 2:30 a.m. in Kansas City when he accosted a woman exiting the drive-thru of a McDonald's restaurant and carjacked her Lexus. He reportedly picked up a female companion and drove to a QuikTrip gas station four miles away in Mission City.

According to Police Detective Dan Madden, the man used a trash bag with cut-out holes for a mask and approached the convenience store with a gun. At the same time, a newspaper delivery man was making his way out of the store with a cup of coffee.

The delivery man spotted the robber and tried to make a run for it, but the suspect forced him back into the store, spilling the man's coffee in the process. The suspect allegedly pointed his gun at the store clerk and demanded money and a pack of Marlboro cigarettes.

But after receiving $55 in cash from the clerk, the robber reportedly had a change of heart.

"He turns and looks at the delivery man and starts apologizing to him for making him spill his coffee," the detective said. "He takes a dollar from the money he just stole and hands it to the clerk and says, 'It's for the coffee."

The suspect fled in the Lexus that police found wrecked and abandoned 30 minutes later.

Mission Police are following several leads about the suspect but have yet to locate him.
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#159 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Jul 19, 2004 12:48 pm

Man, family jailed after arrest attempt

WARREN COUNTY, Tenn. (Court TV) - Lance Champion could not have asked for a more loyal family.

When the 23-year-old Tennessee man landed in jail for attempting a citizen's arrest on a police officer, his entire family rallied behind him — they joined him in lockup.

According to The Tennessean, Champion allegedly pulled up behind a Warren County deputy across from the local jail and tried to place the officer under arrest for violating the speed limit.

The arresting citizen got arrested instead.

Champion was placed in custody and charged with disorderly conduct, resisting and evading arrest. But the situation soon became a family affair when Champion's mother, Janice, and her 17-year-old son arrived to post his bail.

The mother and son duo became confrontational when Champion's car was being towed, the report said.

The younger Champion allegedly slapped the hand of a deputy who motioned for them to leave the area; he was arrested. Mother Champion was also taken into custody when she became vocal during her second's son arrest.

The Champion family's arresting saga continued when husband and father Hal Champion appeared at the jail to get his family released. Champion senior became so unruly officers were forced to restrain him with a Taser gun before placing him in jail.

The family was later released on bond. They have retained an attorney for their case.
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#160 Postby TexasStooge » Thu Jul 22, 2004 11:34 am

Thief Steals Car, Owner's Mother-In-Law

WELLINGTON, New Zealand (AP) - A thief who raced off from a service station with a car — and the driver's mother-in-law — crashed a short time later and left the woman in the vehicle, Auckland police said Thursday.

"We don't know at this stage if the guy jumped in the car knowing she's in there or if he jumped in there and got a bit of a surprise," said Inspector Gavin Macdonald.

The vehicle's owner was filling the fuel tank when the thief leapt in and drove off with the man's mother-in-law in the car, Macdonald said.

The car crashed 40 minutes later, about 30 kilometers (18 miles) away.

"The offender decamped from there and left the mother-in-law in the car," Macdonald said. "I don't think she's seriously injured."

The woman was taken to a hospital for observation. Her age and other details were not immediately available.

Auckland, New Zealand's largest city, is 660 kilometers (400 miles) north of the capital, Wellington.
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