Signs That You are Too Drunk

[sunny]

You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

Your job is interfering with your drinking.

Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alchohol stream.

Your career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts.

The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.

You sincerely believe alchohol is the elusive 5th food group.

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? I think not!

Two hands and just one mouth.. - now THAT'S a drinking problem!

You can focus better with one eye closed.

The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.

You fall off the floor..

Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.

Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!

Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.

At AA meetings you begin: 'Hi my name is.. uh..'

Your idea of cutting back is less salt.

You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed.

The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in..

You think the Four Basic Food Groups are Caffeine, Nicotine, Alchohol, and [Women or Men].

Every night you're beginning to find your roommate's cat more and more attractive.

Roseanne looks good.

Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.

That damned pink elephant followed me home again.

I'm as sober as a judge.

The shrubbery's drunk from too frequent watering.

You wake up screaming 'TORO TORO TORO!' in the middle of the night.

[TexasStooge]

[vbhoutex]

I guess I qualify as being too drunk a few times.

Not in MANY, MANY, MANY years now though.

[sunny]

I guess I qualify as being too drunk a few times.

Not in MANY, MANY, MANY years now though.

lol - i'm with you! i THINK i have learned my "cut off" point, because i haven't gotten anywhere near there in a few years!

[CajunMama]

that darn pink elephant is still following me around

[Pburgh]

Gotta love the 4 Basic Food Groups. LOL

David, I'm so very surprised at you. I've never been drunk in my life - not that I can remember anyway. (of course I can't remember what I had for breakfast!!!!!!!!!)lol Let's see, it may have been some red wine! That's the same as grape juice, right?? With my coffee I had Kahlua. For lunch I'm planning on having a Bloody Mary. YUMMY

[alicia-w]

here's one....

the guy you wake up with is NOT the one you took home....

[vbhoutex]

that darn pink elephant is still following me around

You have a good excuse!! It's Mardi Gras time!!!!!

[vbhoutex]

here's one....

the guy you wake up with is NOT the one you took home....

Well in my situation I hope NEITHER EVER happens!!! I think my wife would be quite upset!!!

[Tornado_Chaser2005]

Hey Rosanna looke good!